For The Love Of The King
by Welcome2MyWorldxoxo
Summary: She was exquisite. Her skin was pale almost white. A light blush tainted her otherwise perfect face and her teeth dug into the soft skin of her lips. Her eyes were like bottomless pools. I wanted to get to know this beauty. ExB.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: I wrote this for my writer's block. I hope it will help me.**

I ran a hand through my dishevelled hair and sighed. Sometimes it really sucked to be a cousin of the king. I had spent the last week fighting in the name of the king against an uproar in the south. We finally had come to an agreement. They would stop fighting against the king as long as they had some sort of power close to the king. They wanted me and the daughter of the chief counsel to produce a male heir so that they would have someone of their own in the court.

I shoved the cloth entrance of the tent aside and walked in. _She _stood there in a dirty dress, which she must have been wearing when she was taken. There was another woman there talking to her. I coughed alerting them to my presence. The other woman looked over at me startled," Oh my Lord I didn't know you would be back so soon. I haven't had time to get her ready." I looked at the girl curiously, but her head was bent down hiding her face from me.

"You may leave." I said to the woman. She opened her mouth to say something, but something in my face must have told her other wise because she scuttled out quickly. I walked up to the girl and placed a finger under her chin making her look up at me.

She was exquisite. Her skin was pale almost white. A light blush tainted her otherwise perfect face and her teeth dug into the soft skin of her lips. Her eyes were like bottomless pools. I wanted to get to know this beauty." What is your name, little one?" I asked quietly.

She met my gaze steadily completely contradicting her trembling hands clasped tightly at her sides." Isabella." She whispered before looking down again. I nodded," That is a lovely name. My name is Edward." I moved away from her to my trunk. I pulled out a small knife and came to stand behind her. Her body trembled. She was scared." Shhhh... relax." I brought the knife down and listened as the material gave way. She squeaked but otherwise didn't move.

The dress fell away from her leaving her only in her shift and stays. She shivered as a cool wind blew inside and I made haste to unfasten her stays leaving her in just her shift. I moved round to her front and bent down and reached the hem of it. I pushed it up slowly letting my fingers drag along her skin. I kept pushing the material up letting my hands touch her thighs, and go over her hips and caress the edges of her breasts before bringing it over her head.

As soon as it was discarded she covered her small breasts with her hands trying to hide them from my view. I gently grabbed her wrists and pulled them slowly away from her body," Don't, you're beautiful." She blushed and looked down not daring to meet my eyes.

I let my eyes wander over her naked body. Her breasts were round and supple with hardened pink nipples. Her stomach was smooth and led down to the patch of curls between her legs. Her legs were long and shapely. She was prefect. I offered my hand to her and she took it hesitantly.

I led her to the middle of the room where a bath had been drawn for her. I helped her in and reached for a cloth. I dipped a corner into the water and proceeded to wipe her face of the dirt and mud that had gathered there. I moved the cloth down to her neck and watched in fascination as the tops of her breast that were peeking out of the water heaved up and down. I leaned back a grabbed a small cup. I dipped it into the water filling it up to the brim.

"Lean your head back." I told her. She obliged and I poured the water through her brown locks. Once I deemed her hair sufficiently clean I carried on down to her collarbone. I made circles against her skin each one getting bigger and closer to her breasts. She gasped as the cloth brushed against her nipple and I paused making sure she was all right. She bit her lip and nodded for me to continue.

I carried on going downwards making sure to give enough attentions to her breasts, loving the sounds of her small whimpers. I moved down her stomach to the curls that resided between her thighs. She stiffened and I stopped and looked up at her. She was holding the edges of the tub tightly in her hands and she looked slightly scared. I removed my hand and stroked her cheek softly," Relax, I wish to only give you pleasure."

She let out a heavy breath and relaxed slightly. I dropped the cloth and gently ran a finger down her slit. Her hips buckled against my hand and I let my finger explore her intimately. She gasped and let her head fall backwards arching her chest towards me. I leaned down and sucked one of her nipples into my mouth. I sucked and licked it as I moved my fingers inside her before pushing one into her entrance. It was so tight. Too tight. I wasn't sure if I could fit into such a small space. I added another finger and felt her walls stretch to accommodate more.

Suddenly her body shuddered and she moaned wantonly. She clenched down hard around my fingers and her eyes were closed as she rode out her orgasm. She sat gasping for breath and I pulled off my shirt and scooped her wet body up into my arms and walked over to the bed. I lay her down on it and discarded the rest of my clothes onto the floor. I crawled up the bed and hovered over her.

She looked up at me with frightened eyes and I leaned down and brushed my lips against hers. I cupped her cheek and moved so that I was between her legs," This is going to hurt." I warned. She nodded and closed her eyes tightly. I eased myself slowly into her searching her face for signs of pain. I stopped when I got to her barrier. She opened one of eyes," Just do it." She whispered unshed tears in her eyes.

I kissed her hard hoping to distract her from the pain." Hold onto me." I mumbled against her lips. She wound her arms around my chest and dug her nails into me. I thrust forwards breaking her barrier. She screamed in pain and hot tears fell down her face as she sobbed.

Her nails dug into my back, hard enough to draw blood. Never had I felt like such a monster than I had then. Not when I was fighting. Not when I was killing. Never. I scrunched my eyes up and tried to stay still. She was tight and warm. After a few excruciating minutes she loosened her hold on me and opened her eyes," You can move."

I raised my eyebrows unsure. She wiggled underneath me and winced slightly." Please."

I drew back slowly and thrust back in. After a few thrusts she lifted her hips up to meet mine. I groaned and buried my head into her neck. She felt so good. I could feel the tension inside building and I started thrusting more erratically. There was no way I was going to cum before her. I reached down and rubbed her clit hoping against all hopes that she was close.

She suddenly clenched down hard around and threw back her head and arched her back," Edward!" She moaned as she came. I groaned in surprise and spilt my seed deep inside her.

She had said my name. I looked at her in awe. She had hardly said two words all night and to hear my name leave her lips warmed me more than I thought possible. I slipped out bed to clean her innocence off me before coming back and cleaning her. I kneeled between her bent knees and wiped the blood off her before climbing back into the bed. She sat up clutching the sheets to her chest and looked at me," Edward?" She asked in a small voice." May I stay?"

I pulled her to my chest and kissed her forehead," Yes, love. You can stay." She relaxed against me and buried her head in my shoulder." What does this mean for us?" She asked quietly and I noticed that she had one of the sweetest voice's I had ever heard." I don't know love. I just don't know."

**AN: This was just something I have had running through my mind ofr a long time. I not actually quite sure when it is set. Somewhere in the 1800's. Review! I will be continueing this because of the response I got, so be ready for the next chapter.**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: You guys convinced me to turn this into a story. Lol this is going to take a lot of research and time. My updating of this might be random it depends. For those that read my other stories you will know that I can update four times in a week or not update for a month depending on when inspiration strikes me. So bear with me.**

I rolled over and groaned as the light filtered through the thin material of the tent. I stretched slightly and was surprised when something moved against me. I looked down to see Isabella curled up to me. The events of last night flooded through my brain and I couldn't help but touch her cheek lightly. I wanted to get to know this strange girl. We were both in a situation, which had been forced upon us, and I hoped that maybe one day we could be close.

She stirred and slowly opened her eyes. I held my breath waiting for her reaction. She looked up at me before a blush spread across her skin. She moved away from me and clutched the sheet to her body trying to regain any sense of modesty she could. She looked down in her lap and whispered," I'm sorry."

My heart clenched and I tilted her head up with my hand," You have nothing to apologise for."

She bit her lip and nodded. I stroked her cheek softly," You're so pretty." I murmured and leaned down and kissed her gently. Se sighed against my lips," Edward?" I pulled away and looked at her, had I over stepped some sort of boundary." What?" She looked down at he lap again," I was just wondering if.... maybe...is there any way I cold be pregnant." I shrugged," There is a chance, but it would take a few months to be able to discern properly." She nodded and fiddled with her hands.

"So we have to do...what we did last night again."

I sighed, I really didn't want to force her to be in my bed." Most probably."

She nodded again," Now?" She said biting her lip furiously.

I shook my head even though I knew she wasn't looking at me," No, that wouldn't wise. You are sore and it would hurt you more than necessary."

She seemed to relax slightly at that," Will it always hurt?"

I shook my head," No, after a few times it won't hurt at all."

I took one of her hands in mine," Hey." I said softly. She looked up at me with her wide eyes," I won't force you to do anything that you don't want to do." She smiled slightly and it was like the world lit up." Thank you Edward. I know this situation isn't ideal for either of us, but I wish for us to be friends or at least amiable towards each other." I think that was the longest sentence she had spoken in my presence. She spoke with passion and conviction and I felt my heart swell with pride for her.

"I wish for that too."

I wrapped my arm around her back and pulled her closer to me. She smiled timidly at me and gently placed her hand on my cheek." You are very handsome." She mused. I chuckled delighted at how well she received me," And you are very beautiful." Her blush deepened," Thank you." She buried her head in my chest and inhaled deeply. After a few minutes of simply sitting there in each others embrace I sighed," We should get up."

She didn't move," I don't have anything to wear, you ripped my dress."

I smirked," And that is why I had a new one brought in this morning." She peered around the room until her gaze rested on the neatly folded burgundy dress and undergarments at the foot of the bed.

"Oh! Thank you."

I chuckled at her surprised face," Well I couldn't exactly have you walking around the camp naked now could I?" I teased." Plus now that the fighting's stopped we will start packing up and head back north."

She nodded and blushed deeply as she sat up," How...how shall we do this?" Ah! I hadn't thought about this. Being a man, nakedness was nothing for me to be ashamed about, but I knew she probably didn't want to see me in all my naked glory.

Thankfully my breeches from last night still lay on the floor near the bed. I swung my legs out of bed and leaned down and picked them up off the floor. I slid them up my legs and stood up doing up the buttons.

I stretched and walked over to the end of the bed where the rest of my uniform was lying. I put on the shirt on and tucked it into my breeches. I then got my boots and pulled them on before shrugging into my coat. I stood up and turned to Isabella," I'll be outside, don't leave the tent unless you must. The camp is a dangerous place for a woman." She nodded her head," Okay.... and thank you again."

I shrugged," It's nothing." I pushed the entrance of the tent aside and walked out into the morning light. The smoke from the fire was wafting around the camp making it look misty. I trudged across the muddy ground until I got to the strategy tent where I knew the lieutenant of our regiment was.

I saluted," Sir." He looked up from the map he was bending over and smirked up at me." Well Cullen, it's nice to see you up. Did you fulfil your duties last night?" I mentally cringed. Everything was a duty to these people. Marriage, a duty, intercourse, a duty, fighting, a duty.

"Yes sir I fulfilled my duty." I answered keeping the ire out of my voice. He nodded looking pleased," More than once?" I flushed slightly, this was getting rather personal." No sir, she was virgin, it did not seem wise to try more than once." He nodded and looked back at the say."Hmmm... Well I have a horse ready to take you both back north, so be ready in a hour."

"Thank you sir." He didn't bother looking back up, he just waved his hand in my direction," You may leave."

I saluted and made my way back to my tent. I paused as I stood outside it. Should I just go in or should do something to announce my presence? I think I had given her enough time to get ready, but you could never be sure with women. I decided to just poke my head in, if she was ready I would go in, if not I would give her more time and she would be none the wiser. It was a win, win situation.

I stuck my head through the flaps to find her sitting on the bed looking at the tent entrance with a slight smile of amusement on her face like she knew that I just spent a few minutes arguing with myself on how to enter. I cleared my throat in embarrassment and stepped in.

"We need to leave in an hour so is there anything essential you need to bring with you now?" She shook her head," I didn't bring anything, I was told that my stuff would be shipped directly to your estate." I nodded," Good." I had sent a letter yesterday to my estate telling them that I would be coming back with a 'guest' and that some clothes and other articles would be arriving and to have it placed in the room next to mine.

She looked down in her lap again," I just want to say I'm really thankful...." I cut her off," Isabella you have nothing to be thankful for." She put her hand up," Please let me finish." She took a deep breath and continued," I know that our situation isn't ideal and I am glad that it was you rather than anyone else that was chosen." A blush creeped up her skin," You were gentle with me and didn't force or push me and I know some men would. So thank you for going slow for me."

I stood there speechless my mouth opening and closing in shock. I finally was able to get my feet working and I went to sit down next to her. I took one of her hands in mine and stared at how small they were compared to mine," I think I can honestly say that I'm speechless." I said wryly. She leaned her head on my shoulder and sighed," Its so strange for me not to know what the future may bring." I nodded," Same for me. This was the last thing I expected to happen when I joined in the fighting."

She chuckled," I should hope so." I couldn't help but laugh along with her. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad. And maybe just maybe things would work out for the better.

**AN: This was a hard chapter to write, but I did it. Review and tell me if I sucked or not. Your opinion matters a lot on this fic seeing as I wrote it just for you readers. That should give some pity reviews. Good times. :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Thanks for all the reviews guys! I didn't expect such a response, I'm glad you like it. This story is easier to write than I first predicted. It helps that I'm from England so I know some of the history and how they spoke. I was a bit down this week because the competition I entered finished and I didn't win, but as my brother always says, you win some, you loose some, and some you just never win. Anyway onwards with the chapter.**

I dismounted from the horse and leaned up and gently to took hold of Isabella around her waist and lifted her off the horse and placed her on the ground next to me. She blushed and smoothed down her skirts." Is this where we will be stopping for the night?" She queried looking up at me expectantly. I nodded and looked around at the meadow. It was a peaceful place far enough away from civilization that we wouldn't be disturbed, but close enough incase of an emergency.

I tied the horse securely to a nearby tree and started to unload the supplies. I laid out a blanket on the floor for us to sit on and got some food from the saddlebag. We settled down as comfortably as we could and proceeded to tuck into a nice meal of bread and cheese coupled with a flask of wine. "How are you feeling?" I asked once I had swallowed my mouthful of bread. We had been travelling for just under two days and I knew how hard it could be on the muscles with all the bouncing around.

She shrugged and stretched slightly wincing," I guess it isn't too bad, I'm just not used to travelling for so long." I nodded," We should reach my estate by tomorrow." She nodded and shivered as a cool wind whipped through the trees. I quickly shrugged out of my coat and handed it her," Here take this." She blushed and smiled," Thank you. You won't be too cold?" I waved her off absently and took another bite of out my bread," I'll be fine."

We quickly finished off our meal and put the supplies away. The sky was darkening rapidly and the first stars of the evening were coming out. I was thankful that it was the summer so it wasn't too cold to just sleep under the stars. I sighed happily, it was so peaceful out here in the wild where man had not touched it's natural beauty. The moon was shining down directly in the meadow and illuminated our 'camp' making it easy to see everything.

I lay on my back with her resting her head on my chest looking up at the stars. I picked up on of her hands and played with it absently." Tell me about yourself." I murmured curiously. She sighed," There isn't much to say. I'm just the daughter of the chief council. I think my father was embarrassed of me. He always wanted a son to carry on the line of men in the family, but he got me. My mother died when I was young and he never re-married so he didn't have any more children. And now that I'm seventeen and still unmarried and will never be, I don't think he will ever want me to come back. He never really took a shine to me anyway. He just wanted me married off to some rich gentleman so he could retire happily."

I stroked her hair. "Im sorry." She shrugged," It's okay. If I ever _did_ marry I would probably have to marry beneath me because of my particularities." I frowned suspicious," What particularities?" She sighed," The fact that I wouldn't make a very good wife. I cannot sew or fix anything. I have two left feet and I love spending time reading and studying. I also have a fondness of cooking and I'm very stubborn. Many men find that unbecoming."

I looked at her in awe. Here I was thinking I had just a normal girl and then she tells me that she is well scholared, stubborn, and likes to cook." I like it." I said a small smile playing on my lips. This girl was so full of surprises. She turned round and looked at me with raised eyebrows like she didn't believe me," Tell me about you." I grimaced.

"My life is probably less interesting than yours. I have two siblings and I'm the youngest. My mother and father live in London most of the time, but I hate it there, so I generally go and stay at our estate close by so that I can see them without the hassle of actually being there. It is so droll in London. My brother and sister are both married and my older brother Emmett has two kids, a girl and a boy.

My sister is only newly married so they haven't had kids yet. My family is very close to the king and somewhere down the line I have some Scottish blood." She rolled her eyes exasperatedly," I meant more personal."

I sighed and shrugged," I'm known to be a jealous man and I have a bad temper. I tend to brood a lot and I've been told that I have annoying habits. I have two dogs, named Maggie and Liam. I was married once, but didn't have any children. She died giving birth."

I went silent after that. I hadn't talked about Tanya in a really long time and I was just glad it didn't hurt anymore." Will you tell me about her?" She asked quietly. I ran a hand through my hair and sighed again," Her name was Tanya. We knew each other since we were babes our parents were close friends. We had a betroval stating that we would be married when I was seventeen and she was fifteen. She was so pretty and funny. She had this long curly blonde hair and these lovely blue eyes.

She was so full of life. But she was too small, too young to be able to carry a child. She died from loss of blood. The child died with her. She always liked going to London. She said she liked looking at all the pretty clothes and things. After she died I kind of just kept to myself. My mother and sister still worry about me even though it's been years. When I heard that help was needed in the south I jumped at the chance to leave my life behind and do something meaningful.

I haven't seen my mother in months and she'll be happy to know I'm coming back. Sometimes I think that by leaving I was being selfish, but I just needed to get away from everything." It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders just talking about. It was something I missed, having someone to talk to.

She turned around a lay her cheek on my chest, "I'm sorry." I shrugged and hugged her closer inhaling her warm scent," It's fine, I have you now." She snuggled into me," As I have you." She said quietly, almost too low for me to hear. If I hadn't be listening so intently I wouldn't have heard it." We have each other." I murmured as her breath evened out and she succumbed to sleep.

**AN: What did you think? Was it good? Review and turn my week right back around. I might get the next chapter out quicker if I get enough reviews! Yes that's right, I'm not above bribery.**

**I now have twitter, you can find me as GeekLover99**


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Thank you for all the lovely reviews! Don't be afraid to ask questions or tell me that I'm incorrect about stuff, because lets be honest history isn't my strong point and I've been told repeatedly that I leave people guessing too much. I will be updating twice this week because the next chapter is really of no consequence.**

My heart twisted in a perticular way as my estate came into view. It was like the last three days we had been in our own little world. Getting to know each other and just laughing and being free and without rules or duties. I sighed and urged the horse into a light trot. I couldn't hide her away forever. I knew that as I was not married to her and we were doing what would be called fornicating that she would not be well recieved in the more higher society.

They would see her as a whore or a mistress that I aquired and I knew they wouldn't see her as the great person she really was. I was dredding going down to to London to visit my family, but I knew it was enivateble. I would just have to make sure that they were well aware of the situation before we got there.

I stopped outside the steps leading up to the door and dismounted. I lifted Bella off the horse and, with her hand in mine, we walked up the steps. Just before we got to the top the doors flew open and Maggie and Liam came bounding out of the house barking and wagging their tails. I chuckled and let of Bella's hand so that I could crouch down as they licked me." I missed you guys too." I said as they carried on their assualt of me.

I stood back up and grabbed Bella's hand and dragged her into the foyer where all the servants were. My butler, Alistair bowed low," Hello Sir, its nice to see you again. I hope you and your..." His eyes flickered briefly towards Bella," 'guest' enjoy your stay." I nodded," I'm sure we will."

I turned to the staff," Angela would you kindly take Miss Swan here up to the room I ordered to be prepared for her." She curtisied." Of course Sir." Bella bit her lip and glanced in my direction. I nodded for her to follow Angela and she sighed and walked off after her. I turned to Sue, the head of the staff," I think we will have dinner in my room." She nodded," Oh, and please have a bath drawn."

"Of course sir." She curtsied and walked off.

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. Things had to be done before I could enjoy Bella's company. I walked into the drawing room and sat down at my desk. I dipped my pen in the ink and started writing:

_Dear Mother,_

_I an writing this letter to inform you that I am back from fighting and am planning on heading down to London to visit you in a few days time. I regret deeply not writing this letter sooner, but due to some unforseen circumstances I have been rather busy. An agreement was drawn up not more than a week ago to stop the fighting. In the follwing agreement was that they wished to have someone of their own near the king. As I am the closest relative that was there at the time I have been intrusted a girl in which I must produce a heir with. I do not know what you must think of me, laying with a woman that is not my wife, but Isabella, that is her name, and I were both forced into the situation so that there would be no more conflict._

_She is a bright girl with a good education and I know that when you meet her you will be as taken with her as I am. In the time we have spent together she has made more happy than I thought I could ever be after Tanya's death. I wish for there to be no conflict between our family over her social standing or other mundane topics. I wish for you to treat her cordially as you would treat any other. _

_While we are there I was hoping that you could take Isabella shopping for some new dresses. I'm sure Alice will want to go to and maybe you could get to know her._

_I simply cannot wait to see you and father again after all these months. Send my love to Alice and Emmett and their spouses._

_Yours Sincerely,_

_Edward Anthony Cullen._

I put down the pen and folded the letter. I carefully put it in an envelope and sealed with the family seal. I walked out of the drawing room and walked into the foyer where Alistair was standing," Alistair, could you please have this sent to London as soon as possible?" He bowed at the waist as I gave the letter,"Of course Sir." I smiled and turned to make my way up the stairs for some dinner.

I entered my room to find a bath drawn and a lovely meal set out for us. I was glad that I had given Bella the room next to mine because there was a door that connected the two. So if I wanted her at any time I would not have to go out into the hallway to do so. I knocked on her door gently.

"Come in." She called. I opened the door and walked in. She was sitting on the bed looking expectantly in my direction." Dinner is ready." She smiled and stood up," Of course."

We sat down at the table and ate. It was a simple soup, but after living on the food I had been for the last few months it tasted like heaven. "We will be heading down to London in a few days." I said conversationally. She hummed," To meet you family?"

I nodded.

She sighed," Is there anything I need to know about them before we go."

I thought through the question for a second."No, not really." She nodded,"Did you inform them of our situation?"

I nodded," Of course, but you need not worry, my family is very different tham many that you will find in London. I think the only one you need to be worried about is Rosalie, she can be a bit of a witch sometimes."

She raised her eyebrows," Okay."

"We'll be taking the carriage and I have asked my mother to help you shop for some extra dresses while we are in London." She nodded again looking at her lap," Edward? What will happen to me once I give birth to a son?"

I looked at her complatively," We'll raise it of course."

She bit her lip worriedly,"Okay."

I sighed," Bella, I know that our situation isn't ideal, but I want you to understand that we are in it from the beginning to the end. You will be his mother and I'm not going to take him away from you. If we want any kind of relationship between us we need to be able to trust each other."

She beamed up at me," You're right Edward. If we want to get anything out of this relationship we do need to trust each other. I trust you Edward, more than I have ever trusted someone in my life." I smiled back at her and felt my heart expand," And I trust you too and I know for a fact that you will make a brilliant mother." She blushed," You can't possibly know that."

I shook my head," Yes I can. The way you hold yourself says a lot in a woman. I know that you will teach him to be loyal and to have respect." She bowd her head embarressed by my praise,"Thank you. I'm sure you will make a lovely father too."

My stomach clenched strangely at the thought of being a father. This would be my first child. But what if the same thing that happened to Tanya happened to Bella? I don't think I could survive knwing that it was potentially my fault that it happened...again. I shook my head of such disheartening thoughts. We would just have to pray that all would be well. I would not let the fear of something that might never happen cloud the time I had with her.

**AN: So what did you think? Still like it? The next chapter is just a fun chapter I wrote they don't really get anywhere with it it's just smut. I mean who doesn't love old fashioned lemons? lol Review and make my day.**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Here is my fun chapter. I just needed to let off some steam and this came to mind so I wrote it down like a week ago, but had to edit it. If you don't like smut skip the chapter because that is all this chapter is.**

She sat naked in front of me, nestled between my outstretched legs. Her back was pressed firmly against my front. I ran my hands up and down her arms and kissed her neck trying to help her relax. She let out a ragged breath and leaned her head back on my shoulder." I've never bathed with someone before." She whispered. I chuckled against her neck," I should hope so." I moved my hands to her stomach and started tracing patterns on her skin.

"How are you feeling?" I asked as I trailed kisses up her jaw and gently nipped it. Her breath hitched and I noticed it was more laboured," I-I'm fine." She stuttered. I slowly moved my hands to her thighs and parted them gently. I massaged her thighs just inches away from where I wanted to be. She buried her head in my neck and I could feel her hot breath tickling my skin."Please Edward." She pleaded. I ran my hand gently through her curls along her slit causing her hips to buckle.

She grabbed on tightly to my forearms and gasped. I paused," Is that what you wanted?" I asked trying in vain to keep the smirk off my face. She nodded vigorously,"Yes please." She asked timidly. I wrapped one of my arms around her waist and rested one of my hands on her breast. I sighed, she fit so perfectly in my palm, like she was made just for me. I moved my other hand that was still resting on her thigh and gently parted her lower lips. Her grasp on me tightened and she moaned as I brushed the small knot at the top of her womanhood.

Taking that as a good sign I carried on my intimate exploration of her womanhood. It gave me a sense of pride knowing that I was the first man to touch her like this. To give her more pleasure than she had known was possible to feel.

I palmed her breast lightly, running my thumb over her rosy nipple. Her breathing was heavy and her chest was flushed. She whimpered against me and shifted her hips wanting more. I loved the way she was so responsive to my touch, how she trusted me enough to touch her body like this. I pushed a finger into her entrance helping to stretch her what was to come later. I added another finger and moved them within her increasing her pleasure.

The moans and the whimpers coming from her mouth sent sparks through my body causing me to harden. She closed her eyes as her hips moved in time with my fingers. I could feel her start to tighten around my fingers and I knew that it wouldn't be long before she fell off the edge. I pinched and plucked at her nipple and quickened the pace of my fingers. Her back arched thrusting her breasts in the air as she clenched down around my fingers in a death grip.

Small shudders wracked through her body as her orgasm overtook her. Her eyes were scrunched together tightly and small whimpers left her mouth. I removed my hand and ran both of them up and down her arms to calm her.

I pushed some wet hairs out of her face and kissed her gently as she opened her eyes looking bewildered. Her eyes cleared and she suddenly looked determind. Beofre I could say or do anything she stood up with water cascading down her slightly flushed skin. She turned around and sat back down on my lap, her legs on either side of mine. Before I could comment or ask what she was doing she picked up a washing cloth and dipped it into the water.

"What are you doing?" I asked baffled. She blushed deeply and held the cloth up to my face," Washing you." She answered simply. I smiled, she was so sweet sometimes. I relaxed and closed my eyes as I felt the soft carress of the cloth against my skin. I felt something soft and warm against my lips and I let my eyes flicker open to find her lips against mine. This was the first time she had ever iniciated a kiss between us.

She blushed and smiled down at me. I cupped her cheek and let my thumb run across her heated skin. "Thank you." I whispered. She leaned into my touch and sighed happily," I should be the one thanking you." I shook my head at her skewed logic and leaned up to press my lips back against hers. She shifted forwards and I couldn't help the moan that escaped me when she rubbed against me.

She shifted again and I felt myself pressing at her entrance. She froze and pulled away to look at me with wide eyes silently asking me what to do. I had heard that it was possible to have intercourse this way, but that it was considered tawdry, not something a gentleman would do with his wife. I gripped her hips tightly in my hands whether to move her off me or to continue I wasn't sure.

She gripped my shoulders tightly and bit her lip waiting. I shifted my hips upwards entering her slightly. She gasped, but made no move to stop me. I was now officially curious, would it be better this way? I looked up in her eyes as I gently brought her down on me. I stopped when I was fully inside her and closed my eyes and took a deep breath. If it were possible it felt like she was even tighter than last time. I opened my eyes and looked up at her. Her eyes were big and she was biting her lip furiously. I ran the pad of my thumb over her bottom lip causing her to let it go from between her teeth.

She let out a deep breath and looked down,"I-I don't know what to do." She whispered and could hear a faint tremor in her voice. I leaned forwards and kissed her gently hoping to sooth her,"Just go with your instincts." I murmured before thrusting up my hips experimentaly. She gasped and arched her back pressing her breasts closer to me and if that wasn't an invitation to suckle them then I don't know what would be.

I bent my head forwards and took the breast that I had neglected earlier into my mouth and started suckling on it like a babe on its mother's milk. She moved against me causing a groan to fall from my lips. The sheer intensity of her being above me, controlling our coupling, was more gratifying than I ever would have thought possible.

Soon we were moving against each other in a hurried manner. There was nothing slow or controlled about this coupling. This was raw. Our gazes were locked together and I could faintly hear water spilling over the sides of our bath at our hurried movements. Small gasps exited her throat as her skin flushed an adorable pink from extertion. I whimpered her name like a prayer and pushed her down harder on me, my hands gripping her hips firmly.

There was something so intimate about this. Our chests pushed together, nearly every inch of our bodies touching, our names falling off each other's lips. She buried her head into her shoulder fanning her hot breath along my neck. Her lips brushed along the path fiery trail her breath had just left and a low moan left her lips.

Her muscles were clenching and squeezing me and I could the coil in my stomach tightening and I knew that I would not last very long now. I buried my head in her hair and inhaled her scent. She was so intoxicating. Everything about her was so different, so new, and I craved it, I needed it. I had never felt like this before. I didn't know that such a strong connection could exist between two people, especially since I had known for such a short time.

Her muscles clamped down around me making it impossible to move and she threw her head back and screamed my name. I don't think I have ever seen something as beautiful as watching Bella climax. She was like a seductress hiding behind a veil of innocence.

I groaned as the coil snapped shooting my hot seed into her. Stars ebstructed my view and I was aware of my name falling off her lips in a mantra as our bodies convulsed against each other. I could feel every one of her muscles in her body mimic mine as we both spiraled down into oblivion. My chest was thumping like a racehorse and my lungs were wheezing for air I had never had such an intense orgasm in my life.

I'm not sure how long we lay there with our eyes closed tring to regulate our breathing before she spoke.

" I never knew you could to it like this." She murmured and I think I detected a faint hint of awe in her tone. I chuckled and slowly opened my eyes." I'd heard of it, but have never partaken in it."

I sighed and sat up, the water was cold now."Wrap your legs around my waist." I murmured. I groaned slightly as she changed her position as I was still inside her and already starting to harden again. She wrapped her legs around me and I cupped her pert little bottom in my hands and stood up. She squeiked quietly before wrapped her arms around my neck. I carefully got out of the tub, mindful of all the water on the floor, and made my way towards the bed.

I lay her down and leaned back on my knees between her legs. She looked so beautiful open for me like this. Every semblence of modesty gone as I raked my eyes over her body. I could feel her eyes on me doing the same, memorizing every dimple, blemish, taking in every inch of bared skin. When my gaze reached her eyes I noticed that she was looking between my legs were I was hard.

She had a complative look on her face as she chewed thoughtfully on her bottom lip. I leaned down and took her lip into my mouth and sucked it gently, erasing the teeth marks."What are you thinking about?" I asked.

She blushed scarlet and shook her head,"Nothing."

I leaned back on my knees and watched as her gaze flickered to my hardened manhood. I looked down at it, was it making her uncomfortable or something? Did she expect that seeing as that I was hard that I would want to have intercourse again?

It twitched under her seering gaze and she looked entrapped by it. I cleared my throat and she looked up at me.

"Can I touch it?" She blurted out, a strong blush covering her cheeks. I looked down at it and then back up at her," You want to touch it?" I asked my eyebrows raised. She nodded. It seemed strange to me that someone would want to touch me like that. No hand, but my own, had touched me _there_.

"Alright." I said relenting. She sat up and raised a slightly shaking hand and touched it gingerly. She looked up at me and I gave her an encouraging nod. She traced me slowly from the base, up the shaft, to the tip. She rubbed her thumb over the tip and my hips buckled and a hiss escaped my clenched teeth. She drew her hand back and looked up at me worriedly. I shook my head panting," No...that felt good." Good was an slight understatement.

She rubbed her thumb and one fo her fingers together,"What is the liquid at the end of it?" I frowned trying to concentrate on what she was saying," Um...that's my seed." She nodded and wrapped her hand around me, her finger barely meeting each other,"Are all men this big?" I shook my head and puffed out my chest pridefully,"No, I'm probably above average." She hummed in what I hoped was an aproving manner.

"Is it very easy to spill your seed?" I raised my eyebrows," I'm not sure what you mean."

"What I mean is do you need to be having intercourse to spill your seed?"I carried on staring at her.

"Like when you touched me earlier and you made me feel nice just like when we have intercourse." My heart hammerd in my chest, was she asking what I thought she was asking?

"Oh, you mean an orgasm. No, it in fact much easier for men to bring themselves to an orgasm than for women."

"So I could bring you to an 'orgasm' just by manual stimulation?"

"Um...I guess."

She gripped me tighter in her hand making eyes roll back into my head,"So what do I do?"

**AN: Hahaha, that was fun. Oh the things I could make these two do. Just wait till Edward talks to Emmett. :p Review!**


	6. Chapter 6

**AN: Thanks for all the great reviews guys! There may be some words you Yankies ( I mean that in the nicest way possible, I personally love Americans) may not understand in here so I'm putting a thing at the bottom explaining what they are. I was going to put this up yesterday, but I was busy writing a secret project.**

We sat in the carriage, me on one side her on the other. We had spent the last week exploring the grounds, going for picnics, lying around in bed until noon. I smirked silently pleased with myself, there had been a lot of time spent in bed. I shook my head in wonder, I had never known that women were so _curious_ when it came down to intercourse.

I looked over at Bella who was figiting in her seat. I smiled slightly," Calm down, it's going to be fine." She looked over at me and narrowed her eyes," You dont know that." She turned away and looked out of the window at the passing senery."Just relax." I said calmly belaying the fact that my stomach was doing sumasalts. She sighed and shifted in her seat," Thats easy for you to say, you're not wearing a corset thats constricting your breathing to a minimal of little gasps of air." I chuckled," That's true, but I must say dear, you look absolutely ravishing." I looked her up and down. She was wearing a light pink gown with a high waitline and puffy sleeves.

Her hair was curled and done up in a bun under her white bonnet with a few curls on display framing her face. She wore a simple pendant around her neck which she said belonged to her mother before she died. She had a white shawl slung around her shoulders and a pair of white, silk gloves that came up just above the wrist completeing her look. When I first saw this morning I almost dragged her back upstairs and into my room.

A small smile played on her lips," Thank you. Angela helped me get ready this morning and if you don't mind me saying you don't look half bad yourself."I smiled," No I do not mind." As much as I liked getting compliments it really didn't change the fact that I hated dressing up. My cravat was itching my neck terribly and my waistcoat was much too tight, my coat was stiff and uncomfortable, and my trousers were scratchy, but according to Alice this was the fashion. I thought I just looked like a dandy, but I never dared tell Alice that, she would have my head. I scratched the back of my neck," Why must clothes be so uncomfortable?" I muttered. I was seconds away from yanking that stupid cravat from around my neck and throwing it on the opposite side of the carriage.

Bella giggled," You are like a child. Stop fussing you're ruining your clothes." I crossed my arms over my chest and pouted," I look like a dandy." She snorted adoringly before covering her mouth embarressed. It wasn't enough to stem the giggles though as she clutched her side groaning," Can't breathe."

I looked over at her amused, at least someone thought that my looking like a dandy was amusing. "Oh Edward, you know just the thing to make a girl laugh." I chuckled and shook my head," I was being serious." She flipped open her fan and waved it in front of her face probably trying to calm herself down."I think you look handsome." I smiled, one side of my mouth higher than the other."Thank you."

She smiled slightly," Anytime." We sat in companiable silence for a while before she spoke again." What is your family like?"

I looked up from where I had been fiddling with my sleeves," Well my mother, Esme, is very caring and loving, she's like a mother hen really, always looking out for her children. She loves art. My father, Carlisle, is arenowned physcian in London. He once served the king himselfThough we come from a rich family and he has no need to work, he prefers to do something worthwhile with his hands than to sit around all day drinking liquir and smoking cigars like most men.

My younger sister Alice is very perky and energetic. She is rather short and annoying, but always gets her way. She loves fashion as is always talking about the latest fashion in Paris or Milan. She is married to an American man named Jasper Whitlock. He deals in cattle and horses. He's very rich and the complete opposite of Alice. He's more subdued and calm. My older brother Emmett is a huge teddy bear. He is over six foot and loves sport. He's a lawyer in the British court. He is always saying the most ridiclus things at the wrong time, but he is amusing. He is married to Rosalie Hale, the daughter of Lord Charles and Lady Mekkena Hale of Cambridge. They are rather stuck up, but nice people.

Rosalie is like the opposite of Emmett, she very proper and stuck up and looks down at nearly everyone and if I dare say it, as shallow as the spoon you would use for desert. If she doesn't like you then she will make sure that you know it. But behind the ice queen exterior she is a nice person. They have two kids, Alec and Jane, who are twins and have just turned six."

"It sounds like you and Rosalie don't get on well."She commented. I shrugged," I don't care who people are and how pretty they are. I treat them how they deserved to be treated. Rose does not share my views so there is a little friction between us...Anyway as I was saying...

There is my uncle Edward who I was named after. He is a judge in the British court and very high in social circles. We will propably not see him as he a very busy man. He was married to my aunt, Elizabeth, but she died a few years back from influenza.

Then there are also the Denali's. They are like our extended family. There is Carmen and Eleazer and their two daughters, Irina and Kate, there was three, but as I told you before Tanya died. Our families are very close so we will propably see them on our visit. I'll try to keep it brief. Irina is married to a French winemaker called Laurent Boniface which has brought some trouble with the whole war going on over there and Kate is married to an American salesman called Garrett Kuaffman."

Bella looked at me with wide eyes before furiously fanning herself," Didn't you think it would be of some importance to tell me that your deceased wife's family would be there?" I opened my mouth to interject that they might not be there but she carried on her little rant," They are going to hate me!" She whined woefully.

"They are not going to hate you. I'm not sure if they are even going to be there, I was just getting you prepared just in case they hear of my coming home and bring it upon themselves to visit."

She seemed to be ignoring everything that I was saying and was biting her lip hard. I leaned forwards and cupped her cheek." Hey, nothing and no one is going to change the fact that we are together. I have already explained our situation to my mother and I'm sure everything will be fine. We are only staying there for a week or so depending on how long my mother convinces me to stay."

I settled back in my seat and sighed fighting the urge to run my hand through my nicely brushed hair. I fingered the top hat in my lap and closed my eyes. This week couldn't end fast enough.

**Cravat**: A cloth men wore around their necks ( A bit like a neckchief)

**Trousers:** Pants

**A Dandy:** A middle-class man who uses this wardrobe to promote himself- least in mind, to a higher class.

**I will put up a link on my profile to the clothes he was wearing so you can get a clearer look.**

**AN: What did you think? Good? Bad? I will be posting the next chapter on Saturday as usual. Review!**


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: I am so glad I wrote this earlier this week as I'm suffering from writer's block and I'm meant to be writing the next chapter Dominated. Thanks for all the great reviews!**

"Edward!" My feet had barely touched the cobbled street before my mother threw her arms around me." I thought I heard you coming and I simply couldn't wait a second more to see you." She exclaimed. I chuckled and kissed her cheek," I missed you too, mother." I turned and reached up into the carriage for Isabella's hand. She grasped mine tightly and exited. "This is Isabella, mother." Bella curtsied," Mrs. Cullen." My mother waved her hand absently," Please call me Esme." She dragged Bella into a hug," You're practically family." Bella blushed and smiled slightly," Thank you ma'am." My mother beamed," Well we must not keep Alice waiting she is just dying to meet you."

She took Bella's hand and led her through the open door and into the foyer where my father stood waiting patiently. "This is my husband Carlisle." My mother said. Bella curtsied," Sir. I would like to thank you for your hospitality in letting me stay in your lovely home." My mother beamed," Oh it is no trouble at all. As long as you are with Edward you will always be welcome in my home."

Suddenly out of no where I felt a pair of arms grab me into a tight hug," Edward!" I chuckled and carefully extracted myself from Alice's firm grip. It was amazing how someone so small could exert that amount of strength." Hello Alice. You have been fairing well I hope." She nodded happily her eyes shining," Oh I'm fine. Jasper has already retired early stating that the British weather is too cold." Before I could answer she spun round to face Bella," You must be Isabella." She said joyfully before pulling her into a hug," I'm Alice." She gushed.

Bella looked at me over Alice's shoulder with wide eyes. I grinned and shrugged. I had warned her that Alice would be exuberant.

" We are going to be the best of friends. Mother tells me that we are going dress shopping tomorrow. It will be so much fun." She paused to take and breath and Bella opened her mouth to say something, but Alice had already finished taking her breath and was talking again," We will talk of this more in the morning. I'm sure you are very tired. Come mother, let us show Isabella to her room."

She took Bella's hand and started up the stairs," You will love your room. Mother designed it herself." They disappeared upstairs with the servants holding her trunks hot on their heels. My father chuckled and turned to me," How about we retire to my office for a drink?" He suggested. I nodded and followed him down the dark halls into his nicely lit office. He went around his desk and took a crystal bottle off the shelf with two glasses. He silently poured us each a scotch before sitting down and taking off his grey wig.

He ran a hand through his short blonde hair and sighed in contentment," So tell me son, how did you find the army?" I settled into a chair across from him and took a sip before answering," At first it was very exhausting and terrifying with all the training and the fighting, but once you get used to it, it wasn't so bad." He nodded and shrugged out of his coat," My father wanted me to be in the army, but medicine was always my call. I was surprised you didn't take it up." I smiled," Well father I found out at a young age that if I became a physician like you that I would have to wear a wig, a grey one at that, and decided that studying science and how the world works was much more satisfying and less itchy."

He shook his head," I see the army hasn't matured you...So tell me about Isabella. She seems like a lovely girl." I sighed and pulled the strings of my cravat so that it loosened enough for me to take it off. I rubbed my neck lightly," Well there was some friction coming from the south about the king. It turns out that some sort of long lost-fifth-cousin-twice-removed-son of the king's was causing riots.

He didn't want to be forgotten and he wanted some sort of strong connection to the king's court. So he, Charles Swan, and the highest commanding officer of our regiment wrote up a agreement stating that I, as closest relation to the king, would take his, Charles Swan's, daughter and produce a male who would be placed in the court as a Cullen."

I downed the rest of my drink and shivered as the liquor burned my throat," How did you feel about it?"

I shrugged," It was obvious to say that I was not pleased at first by that turn in events, but it was my duty to do so. And in doing so I found out that Isabella is a bright girl with a great personality and we get on very well. It's rather nice to have someone around to talk to."

He smiled," That reminds of when I met your mother." I raised my eyebrow in question. He chuckled," Needless to say as much as I love your mother now I wasn't thrilled to have an arranged marriage. Do you know that the first time I met her was but just a week before our wedding?" He smiled fondly at the memories," She such a beautiful smile and her hair was bright orange. The color had tamed now, but back then you could see her coming for miles. She was such a clumsy thing too. It was a good thing I became a doctor otherwise the bills we would have had to pay would have been monumental."

He straightened up in his seat," What I am trying to say son is that love comes in strange packages. I've always felt bad for the way you were forced to marry Tanya. I had hoped that maybe you could have had what we and your mother had, but I guess such things cannot be forced to work the way we please."

I frowned," What exactly are you trying to say?"

He picked up the crystal bottle," More scotch?" I nodded and placed my glass on his desk as he filled it up.

"What I am trying to say son is that you should take love wherever you can. I see how you and Isabella are together and I think with time and patience you could have something similar to what me and your mother share."

To say I was shocked at my father's admission would be to put it lightly. He was implying that Bella and me would fall in love. The concept seemed foreign to me. Yes I had been married before and I had cared and loved her deeply, but I hadn't been _in_ love with her.

I cleared my throat and quickly drank my scotch trying to get over my shock. Could I fall in love with her? I had never bothered to stop to think about that. Maybe he could be right, maybe just maybe with time and patience there could be more to the relationship Isabella and I shared. The thought scared me and made me smile at the same time.

Maybe one day we could be a proper family, with kids and everything. My thoughts raced through the possibilities of the future. With time and patience maybe one day I could have that.

**AN: Well, what did you think? Liked it? Review and give me your opinion or any questions.**

**You can now find on twitter as GeekLover99**


	8. Chapter 8

**AN: This chapter took me about a week to write. Thanks for all the great reviews! Oh! By the way I have started a counterpoint of this story called In The Name Of The King it starts just before the first chapter of this one. It helps explain the whole arrangement thing.**

I was drifting peacefully through the lulls of sleep oblivious to the time or place I was residing when I was hit by a sudden torrent of light. I groaned and rolled over burying my head underneath my pillow.

" Come on Edward get up." A deep voice whined. It was most probably the voice of the person who had dragged me from sleep in the first place by blinding me. I opened my eyes and blinked rapidly," What time is it?" I asked groggily." I have no idea, but Alice and Rose have already left to go shopping with Isabella. Mother has taken the twins to the park and father was called out to the Newton's house. I'm bored."

That woke me up," You left Bella alone with Rosalie? Are you balmy?" I sat up and grabbed the lapels of Emmett's jacket and shook him," She's going to eat Bella alive." Emmett looked shocked by my outburst," Woah brother calm down everything's fine. Rose was smiling and laughing with her as they left. I must say she is quite a beauty." I ignored the last bit and focused on what he said at the beginning.

" Laughing? Smiling? Rose?" I said shocked. I couldn't help it. Whenever Rose was remotely happy it meant she was either getting a lot of attention or someone had gotten hurt. Emmett gently pried my fingers away from his jacket." What did you do?" I asked suspiciously." You didn't put liquor in her morning tea did you? Do you remember what happened last you did that? It was a catatsrosaphre."

He grinned," Actually it was rather amusing until she told Mrs. Cope that her daughters were vulgar and ugly. I thought a fight was going to break out."

I sighed and shook my head trying to concentrate. It was then that I noticed something different about Emmett," Emmett." I said with pursed lips to try and hold back the laughter that was threatening to bubble." What is that on you face?"

He grinned and twirled the ends of his moustache," Do you like it? Its very fashionable right now." I laughed. I simply couldn't help it. He looked hilarious. All he needed now was a manacle and he would look like one of those teddies you see in the toy store. I clutched my sides and fell backwards in my bed." Oh good grief Emmett." I gasped," I don't think I will ever be able to look at you without laughing. You look like a walrus."

He shrugged unbothered by my comment," Rosie loves it. Se says it makes me look handsome." I wiped a stray tear from my eye and shook my head," Well as long you like it." A small bubbled up in my throat and I chuckled," Now get out you big walrus so that I can get dressed."

He shook his head and sat down," Oh no you don't brother, we have important things to talk about." His eyes glinted in a mischievous way. I looked at him suddenly wary. Whenever Emmett got that look in his eye nothing good ever came out of whatever he had planned." What exactly do we have to talk about?" He grin widened," Well little brother you have a pretty brunette girl that is living with you for the sole purpose of reproduction. We can start there."

I groaned internally as he rubbed his hands together gleefully." Emmett I do not feel comfortable discussing such private things with you." His face fell and he sighed dramatically. I rolled my eyes knowing that the theatrics were coming next.

"Do you not love me brother?" He asked with a serious expression on his face. I patted his knee gently," You know I do." He nodded a forlorn look still on his face," Then prey tell why do you shut me out? Was I not the one who came to your rescue when you came to me when you were young and lost? Did I not save your marriage by telling you how to please a woman?" He put a hand over his heart," Im hurt."

I rolled my eyes, I really did not understand why I bothered trying to get of such conversations with Emmett, he always made me talk in the end." Fine, what would you like to know?" He smiled satisfied, no trace of hurt or sadness visible and leaned forwards," Well you should start from the beginning. Was she a virgin?" I raised an eyebrow at him. He put his hands up defensively," The only reason I ask is because it always hurts the first time for women and if you don't ease them into it then you will cause them unnecessary pain."

Of course, he was just looking out for me. Like I would believe that," Yes she was and of course I took it into account." I leaned back in my bed," I hate to break it to you Emmett but you have taught me everything you know." The glint in his eyes brightened," Ah, that is not true. There were some things that I left out that I thought you wouldn't need, but now I thin its time to tell you."

I frowned," Really?"

He nodded," It's something that will make your lady see stars. Most people don't do it or have even heard of it, but it is in fact a very pleasurable for both people." I looked at him suspiciously, yet intrigued. Emmett had never led me wrong before when it came to these sort of things." I'm listening." I said cautiously.

" Well, you know the lubricant women have between their legs? It tastes good." I frowned at him," What exactly are you saying?" I asked confused.

" What I am saying is that it is very pleasurable for both women and men when the man puts his mouth between a woman's legs and laps up her juices." The first thought that came my head was. Ew. It sounded disgusting and unhygienic. The second thought was could that really be pleasurable _and_ taste nice? Emmett wouldn't have told me if he hadn't already tried it.

" I don't know Emmett. It sounds...strange." He nodded," It is the first time, but I'm telling you brother. Once you do it you won't regret it. Rose said she saw stars the first time I did it." He looked proud of himself and I couldn't help but roll my eyes." I'll think about it." He nodded and patted my leg.

"That's my boy. Now get out of bed so that I can beat you at chess." I snorted," Brother, you haven't beaten me at chess since you were ten." He folded his arms over his chest." That's because you are a cheat."

I shook my head," Whatever makes you think you're not a loser." I teased. He hit my arm lightly and stood up," Don't forget to think about what I told you." And with that he ambled out of the room.

**AN: I had real trouble with writer's block for this chapter, but I finally did it! Review and tell me how I did.**


	9. Chapter 9

**AN: Funny English fact: Back in the Victorian times some women had what was called 'hysteria'. So they went to the doctor who would give them an orgasm by hand or machine to relieve them of it. Completely true. Anyway thanks for the reviews!**

I lay sprawled across a couch reading a book on the developments of science, while Emmett tried to beat himself at chess on the table in the corner. After seven games of it with him I had grown tired of it and decided to occupy my mind in other ways. Just then Jasper walked in looking slightly worse for wear. Not that I could really comment. None of us were really dressing up and I knew if mother was here she would be scolding us and telling me not to put my feet up on the couch.

" How are you old chap?" I asked as Jasper sunk into a chair across from me. He shrugged," Better. I'm still getting used to your cold weather even in summer. Back home it would be sweltering right now. I don't know how you survive here." I chuckled," Well when you grow up in a mild temperature you get used to it." He nodded and picked at his nails," So where is this girl Alice hasn't shut up about since we arrived?" I chuckled," Gone shopping with Alice and Rose." He pulled a face," Well, there goes half my money. You know if it wasn't for the fact that I came from a rich family in the first place I would probably be bankrupt by that pixie."

He grinned happily and turned to Emmett," So have you seen Edward's girl?" Emmett looked up from his game and nodded," Yeah, she's a pretty one and she made Rose smile." Jasper raised his eyebrows," Well call my mama and send me packing! The she-devil smiled."

Emmett chuckled," No need for that Jasper. If you would have woken up earlier you would have been around when I gave our brother Edward bedroom advice." Jasper looked disappointed," Damn, what cha tell him?"

I groaned and buried my head into my book," You know guys. I am still here." I said pointedly feeling my embarrassment peek. They ignored me as Emmett went into a deep discussion of how stimulating woman with your tongue was very pleasurable. Jasper nodded," Alice enjoys it." I grimaced not wanting that mental image and tried to concentrate on my book. "So you've heard of it?" Emmett asked excited as an urchin who just found a penny on the ground. Jasper chuckled," We American's aren't as reserved as you English. Everyone over there knows about that."

I gave up trying to ignore them and decided to join in." I don't see why, I mean isn't it unhygienic?" Jasper shook," Oh no. It's actually very clean down there."

"What's clean down where?" Our heads snapped to the drawing room door to see our mother standing in the doorway with Alec and Jane, Emmett's kids. Emmett and Jasper looked over at me panicked like I had the answer to the question. I cleared my throat," Um...the barns down at Jasper's ranch in America." I said smoothly. She raised her eyebrows disbelievingly before putting her hands on her hips," Something tells me that I don't want to know what you were _actually_ talking about. Now upstairs all of you and clean up. I don't want you looking so messy when the girls get back."

" Yes mother." We said meekly and stood up exiting the room quickly.

By the time we went back downstairs with our hair combed, clean pressed shirts and shined shoes the girls were in the foyer laughing and talking loudly. Well _Alice_ was talking loudly anyway. When she saw us she practically threw herself at Jasper. "Jazzy! You're up." She screeched loudly enveloping him in what looked like one of Alice's famous bone crushing hugs. He grimaced slightly and hugged her back. I looked over at Emmett to see he was already busy with Rose. She was swept up in his arms a smile on her face as he peppered kisses all over her face. I looked over at Bella and walked over to her. She blushed as I leaned down planted a kiss on her cheek then dragged it down to her lips. I kissed her relatively chastely and pulled back smiling.

" How was your shopping trip?" I asked quietly. Her eyes sparkled," Oh, it was lovely. All the different dresses and fabric everywhere. Alice insisted that I have anything that took to my liking and I may have taken that a little too seriously." She said teasingly." The only bad part was getting measured and having pins and needles poked into my side but the lavish lunch at the tea gardens made up for it."

I chuckled happy to see her so exuberant and happy." I glad you enjoyed yourself."

"Bella!" Alice said tugging on Bella's arm and breaking the spell we were under." You haven't met Jasper my husband." She thrust Bella in Jasper's direction and she stumbled slightly before correcting herself." Nice to meet you Jasper." She bobbed her head and he reached for her hand and kissed it.

" Edward didn't tell me he had such a beautiful English Rose with him." Bella blushed and looked over at me. I just smiled and shook my head. Even when sick Jasper was the most charming man you ever met. Once a charmer always a charmer.

She pulled back and smiled," Thank you Jasper, but I think Rosalie is the rose in the room do you not?" She said teasingly. Jasper chuckled and Rose smirked pleased at the indirect compliment.

Esme came bustling into the foyer," Dinner is almost ready so girls go clean up." They nodded and raced up the stairs their skirts in hand. I ran a hand through my hair a stupid grin on my face. Esme frowned," Oh Edward! You've ruined your hair, go fix it." I groaned and went upstairs. I was about to go in my room when I decided to make a detour to Bella's room. I knocked on her door.

"Who is it?" She called out." It's me, Edward." She paused for a second." I guess you can come in then."

I walked to find her in her undergarments. I raked my eyes over her before meeting her eyes and pushing the door closed. She blushed and bit her lip" Could you tighten my corset? It seems to have gotten loose." I gulped as she leaned forward resting her hands on the bedpost and sticking her bottom out. I came up behind her and untied the strings before tightening them. She grunted slightly and I paused worried that I had cut off her breathing.

"Carry on." She encouraged and I tightened it up and made sure it was secure. She huffed and stood up straight patting her stomach. She walked over to her trunk and picked out a dress." Is there a specific reason that you came by?" She asked as she slipped into it. I shook my head to clear the not so clean thoughts from my head and cleared my throat." No, I just missed you today. I must ask though, how did you get on Rose's good side?"

She turned to me and grinned," Well on the way here you mentioned that she was shallow sand snooty. Well when I first met her she hardly gave me a second look so I asked her how she did her hair and that I could never hope to achieve such lovely smooth skin as hers and she started giving me a walk through on her beauty treatment. I just had to make sure that the focus was on her, not me. Like in the hallway when Jasper gave me a compliment I deflected it on Rose because she was starting to get tight lipped. I think that was one of the main reasons she doesn't like you too much. You really steal the limelight."

I stared at her in shock and sat down on the edge of her bed," You never cease to amaze me." I said shock still evident in my voice. She blushed and shrugged," It's mainly just being able to read people. I mean you're usually easy to read, but sometimes you hide things and I think that is what causes your bad moods." She walked over to the vanity and started brushing her hair, while I sat on her bed. I stared at her in what could only be described as awe and I was suddenly very thankful to the forces that brought us together. To think about my life without her was just unimaginable.

**AN: So what did you think? Who knew Bella had such a good head on her shoulders? Review!**

**While you wait for the next chapter go check out my new story Whistle For The Choir. It's set in the 50'S.**


	10. Chapter 10

**AN: Thanks for all the reviews! I just finished watching Remember Me and even though I knew exactly what was going to happen, I still cried.**

We were all seated around the table quietly everyone too busy eating to be talking. Esme cleared her throat and put her fork down with a slight clang. We all looked up at her. She gave us her best motherly smile which she only uses when she knows we aren't going to like what she's going to say.

" I ran into Mrs. Cope today." She said brightly like it would hide the words she had just spoken. A collective groan went around the table and Bella looked at me from my right with a quizzical look on her face. "Mrs. Cope is like the town's busy body. I don't even want to tell you about her daughters. Utterly frightful."

Esme frowned upon hearing my words," She isn't that bad." She defended." Anyway we got talking and she and her daughters are coming over tomorrow for afternoon tea so that we help her organize the dance at the end of the week." She said the words so quickly that it took a second to sink in.

The expressions on everyone's faces vaired. Emmett had a wicked glint in his eyes and was rubbing his hands together under the table, Rose was scowling at the table looking like she wanted to stab something. Jasper had a look on his face akin to horror. Alice looked like she was going to explode.

She slammed her fork down on the table loudly causing everyone to jump." No! Do you not remember what happened last time they came?" Jasper put a hand on her arm to try and sooth her but she shrugged him off," I will not put up with that kind of bahavior towards my husband."

" Honey, I'm sure it wasn't meant in a provocative way." Carlisle said in a calm voice. Alice turned her dark eyes on him. Anger and hurt swirling around her dark orbs." She was on top of him on our bed." She hissed." If that isn't provocative then I don't know what is?" She looked at her lap her shoulders sagging. "I'm sorry. My behavior was uncalled for. Now iff you may excuse me." She stood up throwing her napkin on the table and walking out." Jasper sighed," I should go after her." He muttered and left.

" Well that was one way to break the tension." Emmett chimed breaking the tense silience. Rose slapped his arm," Stop acting like such an ass." He pretended to look hurt. "I thought you liked my behind."

"Emmett!" Everyone said at the same time. He gave his best pout and batted his eyelashes. I couldn't help the smile that tugged at the corner of my mouth at his antics. He really knew how to brighten such situations.

It didn't take long before the table was cleared and everyone went to do their prospective things.

I took Bella's hand and led her upstairs to the library where I knew we would have some peace and quiet away from Rose's muttering. I sat her down on one of the many couches in the room and sat next to her, her hands resting contentedly in mine. "How are you doing?" I asked rubbing patterns into her hand. She frowned and shrugged," Okay I guess. I just don't understand what happened at dinner." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair ignoring the fact that I would most probabaly have to brush it again.

" The last time they came over was a disaster. Emmett put liquir in Rosalie's tea and let's just say her day was rather colorful. Anyway at one point Alice notcied that Maria had dissapeared and went to see where she went. She found her on top of Jasper practically attacking a sick Jasper. Respectfully I can understand why she wouldn't want them to come here."

She frowned" Why don't you like them?" I grimaced not really wanting to delve into this subject.

" Because every time they come over they try and win my affections so that I'lll marry one and flood her with riches. None of which would ever happen, but usually they tend to sink their claws into me for the whole time their here and it's rather uncomfortable."

Bella pursed her lips, " What am I meant to do while they're here?" She asked her voice showing her slight annoyance. I gave her a pleading look." Stay with me so that I won't get clawed to death?" I asked hopefully.

She gave me a condesending look," Be serious Edward. We are a scadal. I doubt they'll ever let you in a church again." I shrugged unfazed," Between you and me I always thought church was boring. I only go because I have to with my position and everything."

" Edward!" She exclaimed shocked, but a slight smile gave away her amusement. I shrugged grinning," It's the truth."

She shook her head and leaned it against my shoulder." Still, we do need to fabricate a story so that not too many heads are raised while we are here." I rubbed my chin thinking hard." We could say that you are a friend of Alice's visiting with her?" She went quiet for a second obviously thinking through what I had just said." Yes that could work."

Before we could continue our conservation I heard some noise coming from downstairs. My heart sunk in my chest as I recognized the noise. What were they doing here? I turned to Bella." Stay here." I got up before she could utter a word and walked down the hall and looked over the banister to see my worst nightmare. The Denali's.

" Edward!" Carmen exclaimed looking up to where I was standing." Come down here. Youve grown so much!" I quickly hid my grimace and walked down the staircase slowly. They were all here. They even brought their husbands.

Irina was already undressing me with her eyes while Kate smiled softly and apologetically. My mother looked like she was about to have a panic attack," You never told us you were coming." She said weakly. Carmen waved her hand absently," Oh, we thought we would surprise you. I hope it's not too much trouble." Mother shook her head and squared her shoulders." No not at all. I'll get your rooms ready. Edward tell the rest to the family that the Denaili's are here."

I nodded and raced up the stairs. I knocked on Alice and Jasper's door as it was the closest. Jasper opened it," What is it?" He asked tiredly.

"Denali's." I said urgently.

He groaned and dissapeared back into his room. I ran down the hall to father's office and opened the door not bothering to knock this time.

" Father, the Denali's are here." He looked shocked before closing his book and taking his glasses off.

" Now?" He asked fretfully.

I nodded," Go tell Emmett and Rose I have to figure out what I should do about Bella."

His widened even more at that," Good Lord, this can't end well. We don't need a scandle." I nodded," Don't worry we'll just say she's a friend of Alice's staying over. He nodded absently and hurried off to call Emmett and Rose.

I dashed back into the library where Bella was sitting, waiting for me. She smiled at my entrance," So whos's at the door?"

I gulped loudly." The Denali's." I said weakly.

The color completely drained from her face and I was just glad that she was sitting down. She grabbed the edge of the couch tightly in her hands." The Denali's?" She whispered. Her eyes fluttered before closing as she fainted. I managed to catch her just before she hit the floor. I picked her up bridal style and carried her down the hall back to her room.

I knew I didn't have much time before they realized that I was missing and I placed her down gently on her bed. I patted her cheek," Wake up Bella." I hissed quietly. She groaned and turned over onto her side curling into a ball. I put a hand on her forehead and she murmured something uninteligable. I got a wash cloth from the wash room and put it under some cold water before putting it on her forehead.

She opened her eyes slowly and looked up at me. " Was it a dream?" She asked hopefully. I shook my head grimly. She sighed and rubbed her temples," Do I have to go down there?" She asked quietly siliently pleading with her eyes to spare her from the pain that would likely ensue. I shook my head," No, I'll face the wolves alone." Suddenly the door burst open and Rose came in.

" Edward mother wants you now. What's wrong with Bella?"

" She fainted."

Rose's face lit up," Great! I mean not great for you, but I''l stay here and look after you. There is only so much of Irina I can take."

She flittered over to the bed and pushed me aside sitting next to Bella. She looked over her shoulder at me," Bye bye Edward."

I humphed and left already hearing the shrieks and cackles as I entered the drawing room. Why me?

**AN: Poor Edward. Anyway I won't be posting any other stories this week as I'm going out of town for a few days, but I did write a one shot for the TwiFic Superhero contest. It's called Enigma. I also have another one-shot Until Spring Break that you can check out. It's phone sex. Go check it out, but review first!**


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: I seriously didn't think I would be able to get this chapter out today because I have been out practically all week and my brother's computer broke, but I did it! Thanks for all the great reviews.**

"So Edward what was the war like?"

I was sitting in the drawing room surrounded by Mrs. Cope's daughters and Irina, each waiting to get their claws into me. I really did not understand Irina's obsession with me. I mean she was married for heaven's sake, yet here she sat hanging onto my every word like I was the coming Messiah.

I felt sorry for Laurent, who was standing by the window looking at Irina with pursed lips, his obvious anger and annoyance coming off him in palpable waves.

" It was fine. It took a while to get used to all the fighting, but I got used to it."

They nodded like I was saying the most fascinating thing they had ever heard, Jessica even gave a gasp and placed a hand to her heart." Oh you must have been so brave." She cooed and I looked around the room looking for an escape.

Emmett was too busy trying to escape Mrs. Cope's clutches. It seemed that she had taken a shine to him. Mother was busy trying to distract her. Jasper was friegning sickness so Alice had taken it upon herself to look after him. Bella and Rose had taken the kids out for a walk about an hour before they came and still were not back. I think they did it on purpose.

Kate and Garret were otherwise occupied with father talking about the war in France.

Irina flipped her hair over her shoulder and placed a hand on my arm shooting the other two girls warning looks," So Eddie, you must be glad to be home." She breathed, batting her eyelashes at me. I grimaced and shook my arm loose of her grip." Yes, but as you know I am not fond of the city so I'll be heading back down to my estate at the end of the week." They all nodded in tandem.

" The country must be so lovely and peaceful. It's sad you will be all by yourself." Jessica batted her eyelashes and I refrained from rolling my eyes, could this get any worse.

Lauren, who had been quiet up to this point frowned," He won't be alone. I heard about what happened in the sou..." Jessica kicked her leg." Lauren dear that was just a rumour. You know how Vicki is."

I frowned suspicious." What exactly do you think happened when I was down in the south?" I asked tersely. Lauren looked around carefully before leaning forwards, not catching the warning glances from Jessica and Maria." Well there is a silly rumour going around town that you picked up a girl which by order of the king you must reproduce with, but it's obvious you haven't gotten married so I really don't know who started them."

I leaned back in my chair and narrowed my eyes," Really now? A girl you say?"

She nodded while the others looked on in horror. I crossed my arms over my chest angrily. Could nothing in this place be discreet? I was just about fed up with people putting my private business on the streets. What I did in my house was my business.

" Who told you anyway?" I asked my voice tense.

She shrugged unaware of my reaction to her words," Victoria Chester. According to her, her husband James was your commanding officer and he told her all about it."

I nodded," Well as you can see I'm not married and..."

I was cut off by the doorbell being rung. The butler hurried to open it and Bella and Rose walked in, the children hot on heels.

"Oh, you're still here." Rose said, her tone dripping with derision. Bella stood in the doorway looking wary and out of place. Rose grabbed her arm and dragged her into the room," This is Isabella, Edward's girl as I'm sure you've all heard about it." Her expression spoke innocence, but her tone held some annoyance. Bella looked like she wanted to be anywhere but here and I sunk down a little in my chair silently cursing Rose.

They sat with their mouths open staring from Rose, to me, to Bella.

" Well, that is the real reason you came isn't it?" Rose said and I was seriously ready to strangle her. The whole room was silent even Emmett was frozen in place. Rose raised her eyebrows and pulled off her gloves. She turned grabbing Bella's wrist and pulled her out of the room with her.

The room stayed frozen and I cleared my throat standing up," Could you excuse me for a second?" I left before anyone could say anything and followed Rose and Bella up the stairs. I caught up with them in the hallway upstairs," Rosalie, what was that?" I asked exasperated.

Rose crossed her arms over her chest," Bella deserves to be treated better than some random girl Edward. She is your responsibility so look after her and don't take her for granted." She turned and disappeared into her room leaving me and Bella standing in the hallway alone.

Bella looked down at her feet and I felt my heart clench.

" Can we talk?" I asked quietly.

She shook her head," Don't listen to Rose, you aren't taking me for granted. You have given me so much that I never thought I would get and I'm happy. Rose just has different standards to me."

I looked at her closely before taking her hand and going into my room and closing the door behind us. I pushed her up against the door and sealed our lips together.

I just needed to feel her against me. There was something about being with Bella like this that grounded me and I had missed it in the last few days since we had arrived. She sighed and clutched my shoulders as I moved my mouth to her neck," We can't Edward." She murmured.

" We are at your parents house and there are guests downstairs." I sighed and pulled back resting my forehead against hers.

" I know. I just needed to ground myself." I closed my eyes and wrapped my arms around her.

She sighed and cupped my cheek," We are in quite a mess aren't we?" I nodded and buried my head into her shoulder not wanting to do what I knew I should be doing. I knew I couldn't stay upstairs forever and that I would have to face them soon, but to just stand here with my body pressed up against hers was so soothing that I didn't want to move.

She ran her hands through my hair," Talk to me." She murmured.

" Rose is right." I mumbled into her shoulder." I am taking you for granted."

She pushed my head back so that she could look at me. A frown marring her perfect face," How exactly are you taking me for granted?" She demanded. I sighed," Because I'm trying to hide you away when you belong at me side. I tried to pawn you off as my sister's friend for heaven's sake! What does that say about me?"

She gave me an exasperated look," Edward, if you remember correctly it was I who told you that it would be better if we did that. Your family does not need this kind of scandal getting out. All you were trying to do was protect me."

I nodded still feeling guilty, even though I knew she was right, and buried my head back into her shoulder sighing," I want to go home." I mumbled tiredly. All the stress of the town was getting to me and I longed for the peacefulness of the country.

She chuckled and pushed me backwards," As much as I would like to stay here, I think you should go downstairs and try and rectify the situation Rose caused. Her heart was in the right place and she seems to have taken a shine to me, but we now have a full blown scandal on your hands so we should get rid of the crown downstairs and evaluate our situation."

I nodded and ran a hand through my hair," How did I survive without you?" I asked kissing her gently. She wrapped her hands in my hair and leaned her forehead against mine," The same way I survived without you." She answered simply." How can you grieve something that you never had? As we both know, life isn't simple. It's how you deal with the hand that is given to you that determines who you become."

I closed my eyes and smiled. Everything seemed so easy and simple with her. It felt like I had known my whole life. She made me feel so comfortable and relaxed in a way no one had ever managed to do before. I kissed her softly, yet passionately trying to convey the very importance of her existence in my life.

I heard a knock directly above my head," Edward, you need to come back downstairs." My mother called through the door and I sighed before pulling away from Bella.

" I guess now that it seems the whole town knows about you I won't have to hide you away. Are you up for lunch at the Chester's tomorrow?" I said trying to lighten the heavy emotion in the room. She smiled slightly and shook her head," That's not even funny. Now go back downstairs and try to get rid of them as fast as possible. We have a lot to talk about." I pouted." One last kiss?" I asked hopefully.

She rolled her eyes and pecked my cheek," Go!"

**AN: Well, the only thing I can honestly say about this chapter is that it made me roll my eyes a lot...in a good way. Lol. Don't forget to check out In The Name Of The King if you haven't already. It's Bella's pov of this story. It helps explain about the whole marriage thing. Review!**


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: Sorry for not updating last week. I was doing some construction on this fic but I have now decided to put that off for a while because if I did it now there would be no chapters for a few weeks and I'm sure you guys want chapters, right?**

I opened the library door and peered in hoping to find Bella here. She usually came here when she dissapeared and after everything that had happened today I wouldn't have blamed her for dissapearing.

I found her was sitting with her legs folded beneath her, dress flowing out around her, reading a book. I walked in and sat down next to her," What are you reading?" I asked lightly. She peered at me over her book and I saw tear stains on her cheeks," Shakespere." She mumbled before turning a page and carrying on reading. I sighed," Are you going to tell me what happened?"

Ever since the Denali's had found out about Bella they had been less than kind towards her.

" I don't know what you're talking about." She said not meeting my gaze. I ran a hand through my hair," Bella, you are a terrible liar." She sighed and put the book down.

" It was nothing really, I'm just over-reacting. Irina may have said that you are using me to replace Tanya and she implied that I was just a distraction to you. She also said that I was the iqivilant of a rich whore. She also said that you were meant to marry her after Tanya died."

I ground my teeth together, what in the world was Irina thinking?" You really shouldn't listen to what Irina says." I said gently.

She looked up at me," So you weren't going to marry Irina?" I hesitated slightly," About a month after Tanya died, the Denali's did offer Irina to marry me, but I refused and she has never let it go."

She nodded and I saw her lip quiver. I placed my hand under her chin and made her look up at me," Hey, I'm with you, not her. No matter how it may have looked to everyone else, me and Tanya weren't that intimately close anyway."

She frowned," What is that supposed to mean?" I took her hands between mine and rubbed small circles into them." What I mean is that I never chose to marry Tanya, it was premeditated before I was born. Yes, I loved Tanya, but it was more of a love a brother has for his sister. Yes, we had good times and I cared for her deeply and a part of me will always love her, but I have moved on."

I took a deep breath before continueing," I always felt like her death was my fault. It was my child that killed her and that ate me up, but I don't want another Tanya to replace her. I want someone who is comfortable in their own skin and isn't trying to be something they are not."

"Do you really mean that? You don't mind that I'm strange?" She asked clutching my hand tightly in hers. I shook my head and chuckled," I love that you're strange. It refreshing." She wiped her eyes on the edge of her shawl and smiled."Thank you. You always seem to know what to say to make me feel better about myself."

I smiled and drew her body closer to mine and kissed her forehead," There is no need to thank me. I am merely telling you what I think." We sat there in companiable silence, feeling no need to speak, for a while with our hands clasped together." I must say that my relationship with you is much more simpler than the one I had with Tanya." I commented absently.

"Oh? That is probably because we are not married." She said it lightly, but I could detect a slight hint of hurt in it. I shook my head and hurried to explain what I meant. I had not meant to offend her in any manner," No that is not it. I did not mean to offend you by my lack of forsight concerning your feelings. What I meant was where you and me thrive, Tanya and I did not. Our marriage was more a duty for both of us to provide children to carry on the name. There was never any sparks or anything."

Her frown deepened,"Isn't it duty for us too?"

I shook my head," It's different. With me and Tanya intercourse was like a chore. To be honest I'm suprised she ever got pregnant. We were both young and didn't exactly know what we were doing. It made it arkward and uncomfortable." I shuddered just thinking how bad the first time went.

" So how did you learn how to please a woman so well?" I noticed a blush flush the skin on her hand. I chuckled," Well once you know what you are doing it gets easier, but when I got older my brother gave me a lot of advice and you just mainly have to concentrate on the woman and giving her pleasure before your own."

"Oh." She mused,"But your so confident. You must have gotten a lot of practice in the last few years." I nudged her shoulder with mine," Prey tell dear, what exactly are you insinuating?" I teased. She flushed a deeper red."No! I didn't mean it like that." Her eyes were wide and lookd flustered.

I chuckled," I was just teasing. There was one other woman, but keep in mind that I was very drunk at the time and I felt really bad about afterwards. You see I have a strong moral background so laying with a woman that does not belong to you is considered wrong."

She was quiet for a while, taking in all that I had told her."So do I belong to you?" She asked quietly, hesitantly. I chuckled and leaned down and chastely touched my mouth to hers,"Yes, you belong to me."

She smiled meekly up at me," I quite like the sound of that." I shook my head, I don't think I would ever understand how the complicated mind of a woman worked. I kissed her forehead and stood up," Well, I'm going to retire now, I will see you in the morning." She smiled up at me,"Goodnight."

I smiled and nodded before taking my leave and heading towards my room.

Upon reaching my room I quietly closed the door and turned around wanting to just strip down and sink into my luxurios bedding." Hello Edward." I frowned at the girl lying in just her nightgown arcoss my bed," Irina! What are you doing in here?" She smiled in what I think she thought was a suductive manner and stood up before walking over to where I was standing," Oh I think you know exactly why I am here Edward."

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose as she ran a hand down my chest. I grabbed it roughly and pushed it away." Get out Irina." I said trying to control my temper. Her smile faltered," Don't you want me?" She asked in a small voice. I barely contained the urge to roll my eyes." Irina, not only are you a married woman with a husband just down the hall, but I also don't like you like that Iirina, I thought we established that years ago."

Her lip wobbled," You were young and grieving then. I can be more like Tanya, you'll see. I will make you love me and want me."

I stared at her perplexed," Why would I want someone like Tanya?"

A tear escaped her eye," Because you loved her."

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair, what was with women and thinking that I wanted someone like Tanya?" Irina." I said gently.

" Me and Tanya had a nice relationship I'm not going to deny that, but the feelings I held for her were more brotherly than anything else. I don't want you to try and be something you are not just so that you can get me to want you in that way. It won't happen. I have someone else in my life now Irina and you need to understand that." I was starting to get tired of repeating myself. It was like everything I said had to be repeated at least once for people to get what I was trying to convey.

Her face contorted into self righteous anger," So you prefer your little whore over me is that it?" She hissed. She laughed bleakly when I didn't reply," Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"

Never in my life had I wanted to hit someone, especially a woman, as I did right then." Bella is not a whore. How can you even say that when your here in my room trying to seduce me when your husband is just down the hall? You are married Irina, get it in your brain." By this point I wasn't even trying to keep my voice down. "I don't want you, I never have and yet you somehow think that I do want you." I took a deep breath to calm myself," Get out."

She turned and opened the door and I noticed that her hand shook slightly, whether from anger or from unhappiness I wasn't sure and I was beyond caring," Oh and I expect you to tell Laurent exactly where you were tonight and what you were planning on doing. If you don't...I will." She nodded and left closing the door behind her.

I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. I was exhausted and I'm sure half the house had just heard that conversation. I groaned and stripped off my clothing before I crawled into bed wishing Bella was here with me to keep me warm.

**AN: Damn! Things just got weird. I feel sorry for Edward. review peeps!**


	13. Chapter 13

_**AN: The next chapter!**_

I lay in my bed unable to sleep after Irina had left. It was as if my brain just would not shut down. A million things raced through it and I knew that sleep would be futile at this point. I had heard the argument between Laurent and Irina about me after she had left, and I felt guilty. Not that it was my fault that his wife had a thing for me, but the guy must be angry and unhappy about the fact she tried to seduce me.

I had not spent much time with Laurent and I hoped there would be no hard feelings between us.

I swung my legs over the side of my bed and stood up. I did not know what I planned to do, but lying in bed was not going to get me anywhere. I quickly pulled on my clothes and exited my room. I was about to head in the direction of Bella's room when I saw a light under my father's office door. Remembering that he had a nice stash of brandy on his bookshelf I headed towards there and went in.

I had been expecting someone like Emmett or my father, who I had not expected it to be, was Laurent. We stood there silently for a minute as the tense atmosphere surrounded us. How do you act around someone whose' wife tried to seduce you and he knows about it? I cleared my throat, "Um...hey." He nodded, "Do you know where any strong liquor is?" He asked.

I couldn't help but chuckle. "Yep, living here when I was young has given me insight into where my father keeps the good stuff." I went over to his bookshelf, pulled out his Latin Bible, pulled out a bottle of brandy and waved it at him.

He looked relieved and fetched two glasses. I poured a generous amount in both our glasses and we silently drank. It was still tense, but I was sure once we had both finished our stiff drinks it would dissipate.

"So…," he said, "What are you doing up?" I grimaced. "My brain won't shut down and I was about to head to Bella's room when I saw a light under the door. I remembered my father's stash of liquor and decided that I needed a good stiff drink before I did anything," he nodded and sighed.

Just then, the door opened and Jasper stuck his head in. We both raised our eyebrows at him, "Want a drink?" I asked pointing to the brandy. He grinned lazily, "I was hoping that you wouldn't mind if I joined the party." He walked over to the cabinet and got a glass out and I poured him some brandy.

"So…Edward, I have to ask. How is she in bed?" I looked at Jasper in exasperation, "What is with everyone and prying into my private business?" He shrugged, "It's a safe subject, plus we are men. We are meant to talk about such things," I rolled my eyes.

"Fine. She is very…good in bed." He raised his eyebrows, "Come on. You have to give me a little more than that." I looked at him for a second, "Well, she's very curious when it comes to intercourse." I said trying to calm my heated cheeks.

They both looked enthralled by my admission, "Please continue." Laurent said, "What is it that you mean by curious?" Just then, the door opened again and this time Emmett came in. "How come I wasn't invited?" He asked a sly grin on his face.

It seemed that not many of us could sleep tonight and I held up the brandy in invitation, "Care for a drink?" His grin intensified, "I thought you would never ask." He went and fetched himself a glass before pouring himself a drink, "So what were you talking about before I came in?" He asked.

"Edward was just saying about how curious Bella was when it came to intercourse," Jasper said filling him in on our conversation. Emmett's interest was immediately piped and he looked at me. "Well…please, do carry on," he said and sat down on the edge of the desk.

I felt my skin flush, "All I was saying was that she likes to try things...sexually." I quickly took a large gulp of brandy as everyone nodded.

"Women are like that." Emmett said, "I mean, we all know that Rose is all little icy, but as soon as those doors close - she's like a firecracker. The way that woman contorts her body is astonishing." He looked off into the distance probably thinking dirty thoughts.

"Yes, I know what you mean. Society seems to think that women should be submissive behind closed doors, but I actually enjoy it when Alice takes charge. I won't go into details as her brother's are present, but for someone so small - she sure is energetic."

We all turned to Laurent to see what he had to say. He shrugged, "Well…I'm not sure what to tell you. Irina and I are not exactly close in that sense, but back in France there was this one girl I was with. She had fiery hair and a fiery attitude. The things she showed me," he shook his head in awe.

"Did you know in France, that it is common for women to take their husband's phallus into their mouths?"

I raised my eyebrows, "Really? Emmett was telling me earlier about putting your mouth between a woman's legs." Laurent nodded, "Oh yes, that happens frequently also, but Irina thinks such things are improper to do. I guess I caught a real high class woman," he said with a hint of mirth in his voice.

I looked at him apologetically, "If it makes you feel any better. I haven't done any of those things either. I only just found out about them. The most adventurous I've been was when Bella and I were in the bath and we had intercourse with her on top." My blush deepened and I silently berated myself for not having a filter.

"What about Tanya?" That question came from...wait a minute. We all turned towards to find Garrett standing there. I practically choked, "Um...no. Tanya and I had a very boring life behind closed doors. Even to this day, I am surprised she even got pregnant. What about Kate?"

He shrugged and snagged the bottle of brandy, which was going down pretty quickly, "Kate likes to try different things. She is generally reserved behind closed doors, but every so often - she'll surprise me," We all nodded and I passed around the bottle so we each could top off our drinks.

"So…what are your and Bella's plans after the whole debacle in the drawing room yesterday?" Emmett asked. I shrugged, "We'll probably head back to my estate tomorrow. I don't want to expose her to too much of the gossip. I'm sure mother will be sad, but I'll just say that she and Alice can come down, seeing as the dresses aren't finished yet anyways," they all nodded in understanding. "That really is inconvenient," Emmett said. "I was hoping you would be able to stay longer," I sighed just as the door opened once again and our father stood in the doorway his eyebrows raised in question.

We all stilled as he looked us over," What are you all doing in my study?" He asked and everyone pointed to me, "It was all him," Emmett said. I looked at them is disbelief before pointing at Laurent, "He was here before me."

"Hey!" Laurent said. I shrugged, "If I'm going down, then - I'm taking someone with me."

"Is that what they taught you in the Army," Emmett quipped and the rest sniggered.

Traitors.

My father raised a hand for silence and it went quiet again, "Are you drinking my best brandy?" Everyone looked at me and I quickly looked up at the ceiling. He sighed, "What are you all doing up anyway? Go back to bed." We all slipped out of his office our heads bent like naughty school boys, but instead of going back to my room, I went down to the end of the hall and slipped into the room I knew Bella was residing in.

I walked quietly and sat on the edge of the bed. She looked so serene as she slept. I leaned down and brushed a stray hair off her face. She stirred slightly and stretched before her eyes flickered open. She seemed confused for a second before she spotted me sitting at the edge of her bed. She smiled sleepily.

"Hey, what are you doing in here?" She asked quietly moving to lie on her side facing me. Her hair spilled around her head and she brushed it away so that it was draped behind her shoulders.

"I can't sleep," I said simply. She frowned slightly, "Is this about Irina again? I heard you and her arguing and then her arguing with Laurent." I shrugged, "I really don't know. My brain won't shut up."

She sat up partially and bit her lip, "Won't you get in trouble for being in here?" I shook my head, "Not if no one catches me." She seemed to contemplate my answer for a minute before scooting over to the far end of the bed. She pulled the covers back. "Hop in, but no funny business."

I raised my eyebrows minutely before obliging. I pulled the covers back over us and drew her close to me inhaling her scent. She sighed against my chest and it was not long before she dropped off back to sleep.

I closed my eyes and snuggled down further underneath the covers holding her tightly. There would many things we would need to sort out tomorrow before we left, but right now - I did not want to think about tomorrow. Not about how awkward breakfast would be, seeing as the whole house had heard the whole Irina thing. Not about how sad my mother would be when we left. All I wanted to think about right now was beautiful girl in my arms.

So, that is exactly what I did.

_**AN: So? What did you think? Review!**_


	14. Chapter 14

**AN: So I was bored...and when I get bored I like to write smut so...yeah. Here's a nice smutty chapter for you guys. There's only ten percent plot in here.**

To say that the next morning was the most tense, awkward, breakfast of my life would be a vast understatement. We were all sitting around the table eating. Well, Irina seemed to be more stabbing her food before shovelling it into her mouth in a really unlady like manner. No one spoke and eye contact was minimal.

I heard cutlery clattering before my father cleared his throat. I looked up over at him.

"They say the weather should be stormy today." He commented and I couldn't help, but smile. Talking about the weather was an English way of saying that this was an extremely awkward situation and he was speaking just to fill the tense silence. I decided to give him a helping hand.

"Really. Do you think it's acceptable to be driving in it?" He shook his head, "I'm afraid not. Too windy." I sighed; great we would have to stay here another day. "Why would you be leaving?" My mother asked.

I sighed again. I really did not want to be having this conversation here. "Due to the current circumstances I think it would be best for us to leave before half of London starts to queue up outside our house to try and look at the scandal housed within."

Her face looked so sad, "But you only just came back." I smiled wryly, "I know, but Bella's dresses won't be finished until the end of the week so why don't you come down and visit us then with Alice." I suggested. Her face lit right up.

"That is a splendid idea. Don't you think Alice?" Alice smiled and nodded, "Yes. It sounds wonderful. There are so many things that Bella and I have to talk about and I would have been saddened to know that it would be a long time until we would meet again."

The table became alight with chatter as mother and Alice started to make plans to visit it us when the dresses came. "May I accompany them?" The table was silent for a split second at Rose's request before I smiled at her. "Of course you may Rose."

The rest of breakfast past much more easily with everyone making plans for the day. I t seemed that even though the weather would not hold up for the full day, the morning would not be all that bad.

Bella and I decided to stay at home even with the invitation to accompany Rose, Alice, Emmett, and Jasper with the twins to the park. I think we needed an escape from all the drama and a chance to have the house for ourselves seemed too good of an offer to pass up.

We sat comfortably in the corner of my room reading in prospective chairs...well I'm sure Bella was reading, me on the other hand used the time to let my mind wander. Of course being the man I was it eventually ended up being of a sexual nature, but really that couldn't be helped. With everything that I had heard last night from the other men my curiousness about putting my mouth on Bella had reached new peaks. I mean, it obviously couldn't be that bad if it was such a popular act.

"What are you thinking?" Bella asked looking over at me.

I looked up startled from my deep thoughts and felt a light blush spread along my cheeks. My thoughts were not really one's that should be shared in public, seeing as it was a very closed off subject.

"Just a chat I had yesterday with the rest of the chaps in the house." I said off-handedly. She tilted her head to the side and a small smile tugged at her lips, "It must have been a very interesting talk for you to be blushing like that." She said, her eyes shifting back to her book.

Her observance had always gotten the better of me.

"It was indeed." I murmured. I could tell that though she wanted the press the subject she wouldn't out of common courtesy. I closed my book and leaned forwards wondering how I would go about asking this. I knew she was curious and there wasn't a better time to bring this up seeing as we had the house to ourselves.

"How much do you like science?" I asked. She raised her eyes brows and placed her bookmark in her book and placed it flat in her lap. "I've always been curious about how the world works, why?"

I let the corners of my mouth tug upwards as I spoke, "How opposed would be to trying a little _experiment_?"

She eyed me for a second before answering," It depends on the nature of the experiment." She said coyly.

I grinned at her, "It's purely sexual."

A blush creeped up her pale skin, "I'm listening." My grin widened, "Well let's say that this _experiment_ that I want to try is based purely on the fact that I'm curious and would like to see what...reactions it would invoke in you."

She smiled at me, "Well, you would have to tell me what this experiment is before I let you try it." I nodded and relaxed back into my chair with my hands folded in my lap. "It involves my mouth on you." She frowned," On me?"

I nodded, "Yes, on you...intimately."

She frowned for a second before reorganization dawned on her."Oh...oh!" Her eyes widened and a deeper blush spread across her face. "You mean..." Her voice trailed off and she looked out the window her lip placed firmly between her teeth.

Her brow furrowed and she seemed deep in thought. After a few minutes her eyes darted back to mine, "I don't know." She said uncertainly, "Are you sure you want to even do...that?" I could see where her apprehension stemmed from as I had qualms of my own when I had first heard it.

"I have given it much thought and I've decided that for purely scientific reasons that I would like to try it." She gave me a disbelieving look, "I'll believe that the day you sprout horns." The wry tone of her voice telling that she didn't believe me for a second. "Well, with the way things are going it seems that it will happen sooner rather than later." She rolled her eyes and gave me contemplating look.

"If I agree to go along with your little experiment...what will I have to do?"

I shook my head," Absolutely nothing. You don't even have to move."

She nodded, "Okay then. I guess if it's in the name of science then...you can try." Somehow I managed to contain my triumphant grin and look serious, "Are you sure?" I asked, "You know you don't actually have to do it." She nodded, "I know. I wouldn't have said yes, if I didn't want to."

I stood up and moved over to where she was sitting. I placed my hands on either side on the chair and stood between her legs before leaning in close so that our faces were barely inches apart. "Are you sure, you're sure?" I asked quietly and her eyes flickered closed and she nodded, "Uh huh."

I pressed my lips against hers softly and ran a hand through her hair. Her breath stuttered slightly before she reciprocated, winding her small hands into my hair and responding with timid ferocity, if such a thing existed.

I dragged my lips away from hers and moved them to her neck, sucking and licking at the delicate skin there. She let out a breathy moan and I smiled against her neck, "Are you sure you want me to do this?" I asked once more, just to be certain.

"Yes." She breathed. "If I do anything to make you uncomfortable, you have to tell me, okay?" She nodded vigorously and I took a deep breath before I kneeled between her parted legs and ducked underneath her skirts. The stilted light surrounded me and I guided myself up her legs using my hands. Once I had reached the apex of her thighs I dragged one of my fingers down her slit.

She gasped and her hips buckled forwards encouraging my ministrations. I felt wetness coat my finger as I dipped it inside her, stroking her gently before circling the knot at the top of her womanhood. She moaned quietly above me and more wetness gushed out.

I withdrew my finger from inside and, before I could change my mind, I placed it into my mouth and sucked her juices off it.

I wasn't sure what I had been expecting when I tasted it, but I had not expected it to taste so much like...Bella. It was like her scent had been concentrated and placed between her legs in a liquid form. Needing no more hesitation or worry I placed my hands gently on her hips and leaned forwards. My cheeks brushed against the hot skin of her thighs and I stuck my tongue out and licked her slit from top to bottom.

She gasped and made a sound that I had never heard before. It sounded like a cat mewling." Oh Edward." She moaned. Encouraged by her reaction I parted her lips with my tongue and started to explore her in this new way. I could smell her all around me, pulling me in deeper, intoxicating me as I wrapped my lips around her bundle of nerves.

"Oh my!" Bella called out rather loudly as I accidentally nipped her with my teeth. I paused slightly to see if she was okay, but I felt her hands on top of my head above her dress push me further into my newfound heaven. My fading control snapped and I attacked her womanhood like a man starved of water. I licked and sucked her flesh into my mouth. My tongue ran over and dipped into every crevice available.

My hands gripped her bare hips and I groaned against her. I could feel my erection straining painfully against the crotch of my breeches. Never had there been a day that I was more than ready to admit that Emmett was right. The eroticness of giving her pleasure while giving myself pleasure in this indirect way was so much more than I ever thought I could achieve.

I felt her body start to tremble and I knew that it wouldn't take much to send her over the edge. I dipped my tongue into her entrance and she gone. Her body shook as my mouth worked vigorously against her, eager to drink ever last drop of what her body gave me freely. Her cries were sharp and loud, her fingers digging into my head through her dress. "Oh Edward!"

I pulled back and came up out from under her dress to be met with bright light. I blinked for a second, adjusting my eyes to it and licked my lips clean before taking my handkerchief out of my pocket and wiping any residual juice from my face.

I stood up and grimaced, feeling my erection throb in my breeches. I adjusted myself slightly and sighed.

"All in all I think that went well." I said going back to my seat and picking up my book like nothing had happened. She smiled contentedly and straightened in her chair, "I saw stars." I chuckled and flicked through my book looking for my place. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat as I tried to distract myself from the throbbing pain in my lap.

"Does it hurt?" She asked nodding towards my lap, once again her observance coming through. I swear she sees everything. I shrugged trying to be off hand about it. "It's fine. It'll go down." Well, eventually anyway.

"You didn't answer my question." She pointed out. I rolled my eyes and sighed," Fine, yes it is kind of painful and uncomfortable, but it isn't anything that I cannot handle." She frowned, "Would you like me to help you relieve it?" I paused for a second. I had been thinking of just going into the washroom knowing all I needed were a few strokes to relieve myself of the pressure. I didn't want her to feel obligated to do something for just because I had done something for her.

"It's fine. If it gets too bad I can always just go and get rid of it myself." Her frown deepened, "Do you not want me to help you?" I detected a slight hint of hurt in her voice and I sighed," It's not that I don't want you to, because trust me I do, I just don't want you to feel obligated to do it." She scoffed at that, "How many times must I tell you that if I offer to do something for you then I mean it? I know I do not have to do it. I was politely asking if I could."

I raised my eyebrows and let a slow grin spread across my face. "Well then by all means, please do as you wish with me. I am your humble servant." She rolled her eyes and came over where I was sitting and kneeled between my legs. She undid my breeches and pulled me out of them. I let out a low groan at the feel of finally being free from my confines.

She wrapped her small hands around me and started to stroke me just like I had taught her. I slouched low in my chair and let out a low oath under my breath. It had been too long since I had any kind of release and I could feel all the pent up frustration of the week bearing down on me ready to explode at any moment.

She held a look of pure concentration as she worked her small hands up and down me rhythmically. Her pink little tongue peeked out of her mouth as she smoothed her thumb over the head. My hips buckled upwards and I moaned freely, not caring if any passing servants heard. Just feel of her hot, little hands wrapped around me was enough to ensure a quick release, but that tongue flicking out and moving languisly against her lips made me twitch.

Suddenly my mind bombarded me with an image so horrifying and erotic that I felt myself stomach twist and tighten. "I'm close." I warned as I thrust up in her hands. She nodded knowing the implications of my words and started working me quicker. My moans and groans spurred her on and after one quick twist of her hands as she reached the head I felt myself fall over the edge. My seed spurted out of me in three hot spurts landing on my shirt, but I could not bring myself to care.

Bella stood up and disappeared into the washroom to clean her hands and came out with a cloth to clean me up with.

The image that had flashed through my head stayed imprinted on my brain. I could hardly fathom from where it had come from.

It was an image of her...mouth...on me.

Now it was one thing for me to put my mouth on her intimately, but the sheer magnitude of lust that had overtaken me when I had pictured her lips wrapped around my throbbing manhood had been astounding. I would never ask her to, of course, I wasn't even sure I wanted her mouth there. So many things could go wrong and it was an appendage on my body that I quite liked, and needed. My mind fought with itself as she cleaned me up.

I pulled my top over my head and discarded onto the floor and tucked myself back into my breeches before stretching my arms out to her. She settled sideways onto my lap and leaned into me. I kissed her forehead lovingly, "Thank you." I murmured.

She blushed, "I should be the one thanking you. What you did...it was amazing." I chuckled, happy that she enjoyed it as much as I had.

"Edward?" She questioned quietly.

"Hmmm?" I answered closing my eyes and leaning back comfortably basking in the post coitial glow.

"Do you think that...maybe...some time later- in the future- you would consider...you know...doing it again?" My lips twitched as I fought against the instinct to laugh.

I opened one of my eyes to see her beet red face looking into her lap. I placed a finger under her chin forcing her to look at me, "Any time you like love, any time you like."

**AN: Well wasn't that an interesting chapter? Lol review and tell me how I did.**


	15. Chapter 15

**AN: I'm sure you guys will enjoy this chapter. I have been waiting since forever to write this. Enjoy and thank you for the reviews, they make my day so much better and make me want to write more! Thanks to Nails233 for beta'ing this baby for me.**

"Edward!" I turned to find a smiling Laurent walking up to me. I raised my eyebrows slightly surprised by his cheerfulness.

"Um...Laurent, what do I owe the pleasure of your presence?" I asked cautiously.

He chuckled and clapped me on the back, "Always so polite." He murmured, his grin still firmly in place. "I was wondering, seeing as I am going back to France next week for a few months to look over my Chateau and sort out some business, if I could extend an invitation to you and Isabella to come visit me…as an apology of sorts for Irina's behavior. She won't be joining me over there as her mother requires her attention for some reason or other."

Once the shock of his request wore off, I noticed that he didn't seem at all bothered by the lack of Irina's presence for what, essentially, could be for over six months depending on how his business went. I ran a hand through my hair and smiled.

"I'm not sure Laurent. I will discuss it with Bella and get back to you before you leave. It is a very kind offer though. Thank you."

He shrugged still looking extremely happy, "It's really no problem. It's not every day you find a girl like Bella." He winked knowingly and I looked at him skeptically wondering what he could have possibly meant.

Just as I was about to question him on it, I heard heated talking from downstairs. Without conscious thought, I let a groan slip through my lips knowing that an argument was taking place.

Ever since everyone had come home yesterday, after mine and Isabella's _experimenting, _Rose and Irina had been at each other's throats. The tension in the house was climbing to such heights that a blow up would not be that hard to imagine and I was guessing that it was starting now.

I walked quickly through the halls, my heart starting to speed up at the thought of what could be happening. If Irina so much as laid a hand on Bella, I would not be held responsible for my actions. I could now see why Laurent was glad to have some time to himself in France. Pardon my French, but Irina was a first class witch.

I made my way quickly to the drawing room to find Irina and Rose inches apart screaming at each other. I could not quite understand what they were saying, but I caught onto the fact that Irina was bad-mouthing Bella - again. Bella stood stricken in the corner, hurt and disbelief clouding her face. Her eyes flickered over to me before her face crumpled and she ran past me.

Anger coursed through my veins and I stormed into the room and pushed the two of them apart before they actually started hitting each other. I turned to Irina, "What is your problem?" I shouted at her. I couldn't control myself any longer. I had tried to say it nicely and she just would not listen.

Irina blinked taken aback by my harsh tone. "W-w-what?" she stuttered.

I narrowed my eyes at her. "You know exactly what I am talking about," I hissed.

"Maybe, it's the fact that you've been nothing but a vindictive, mean, selfish little witch since you arrived. And you know what? I will not stand for it any longer. You need to get your head out of the sand and take a good look around because staying at someone's house and doing nothing but causing trouble and saying mean words, is not the way to go. You say that Bella is a whore - she is not. The only whore in this house that I can see is right in front of my eyes."

An audible gasp went around the room where the rest of the women had gathered to watch our one-sided argument. Suddenly, I felt someone tug on my arm. I turned and was met by a hand that slapped me across the face. An angry looking Carmen stood before me, visibly shaking with anger.

"Never ever speak to my daughter like that again. Is this how you were with Tanya? Maybe we should be happy she's dead." Her voice raised an octave as she spoke, her face red with anger. I could not help my reaction to her words, I just couldn't. I started laughing - hard.

"Wow that was low, even for you. And yes, maybe you are right. We should be happy that she is in a better place because I doubt she would be pleased at how you have all turned out. You are no better than your daughter Carmen. All through this, you have done nothing but encouraged her to talk badly about Bella. I am sure you even gave her a hand in her plan to seduce me. What you do not understand is, what Bella and me have is not something that can be ended by a few cruel words. We are both in it until the end. So you can accept that or you can leave."

I crossed my arms over my chest and stood back waiting for her reaction. She spun round to face Esme and screeched, "Are you going to let him speak to me like that?" Esme looked at her calmly, but I could detect the small crinkle at the edge of her eye signaling that she was not happy, but was suppressing it rather well.

"Carmen, you turn up at my house unexpected and expect me to cater to your every whim. You bad-mouthed my children and have been nothing but disrespectful. Your daughter has been no better. Only Kate and your husband have been amiable to this family. I am not sure what your agenda is here, but I'm going to have to ask you all to leave. You may write a letter asking if you can come back when you put this attitude behind you. I would hate to lose such a long-term friend. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to make sure the carriage is ready for my children's departure."

She smiled warmly as she past me and I smiled back grateful. Not only had she stood up to Carmen - she had said that Bella's was like a daughter - who was quiet for a second before she started screeching unintelligibly. I turned away not wanting to hear what she had to say and walked out of the drawing room and went upstairs to Bella's room.

I knocked gently on her door, but got no reply. I opened it slowly and made my way over to the bed where Bella was laying face down, her head buried in the pillows.

"Bella?" I said cautiously.

"Please leave me alone Edward." She pleaded quietly. I sighed and shook my head. Settling on the side of the bed, I stroked her hair.

"Please talk to me." I begged, not wanting her to go through this on her own. She pushed herself into a sitting position and turned to me streaks of tears on her cheeks.

"You don't get it!" she said exasperated. "I never wanted this. I never asked for it. I used to be just a normal girl and now look at me! I am trying so hard to fit in a place where I do not. It is like putting a square peg in a round hole. I hate the way people look at me and I just want to go back to how I used to be, without all this drama and...everything!" Tears streamed down her face, she used the back of her hand to brush them away.

"I'm scared, I am tired and I just want some peace and quiet away from all this. I just need somewhere where it's just Edward and Bella, not the gentleman and the whore." She looked away and I pulled her stiff body into my arms and carried on stroking her arms until she relaxed into me. I closed my eyes and buried my head in her hair.

"I'm scared too," I admitted. It was not easy for me to talk about this, but I took a deep breath and carried on. "I'm scared of losing you, like I lost Tanya. I'm scared of becoming a dad and I'm scared of what the future holds for _us_. I want so much, but am guarantied so little that I don't know if I should get my hopes up, to only be met with disappointment…," I trailed off with a sigh as I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in." I called.

The door opened and Alice came in a small smile on her lips. "Mother told me to tell you that the carriage is ready and packed up. I also brought this for Bella seeing as half of London is waiting outside to get a glimpse at the one of the biggest scandals," she held out a light blue cloak that matched her dress. Bella looked up at Alice and smiled a watery smile.

"Thank you," she whispered. Alice shrugged and gave her a quick hug.

"You'd do the same for me. It's what sisters do for each other."

The next ten minutes went by in a bit of a blur. We said our goodbyes to everyone - except, of course, Irina and Carmen - and exited the house after giving promises to write. Alice had not been kidding when she said half of London was on our doorstep. People milled outside the house and all the way down the street obviously trying to get a glimpse of the girl that I had on my arm. I was exceedingly grateful that Bella was wearing a cape and therefore her face could not be seen by anyone.

I helped her up into the carriage and climbed in after her, choosing to sit beside her, instead of across from her. She clutched one of my hands tightly between hers and leaned her head on my shoulder. I wrapped my free arm around her waist and planted a firm kiss on her forehead.

"Everything is going to be okay," I whispered.

She buried her head deeper into my shoulder and let out a small sob. I felt sick to my stomach by all of this. It took so little for society to turn on you and treat you like a pariah and it seemed unfair that someone, like Bella, who had been so strong through this whole ordeal, should be reduced to tears from the emotional abuse. She had hid her emotions so well from me. The exhaustion, insecurity, and stress that had filled our lives for the past few weeks were not something I would want to revisit.

It was places like this that made it impossible to protect her from all the jealousy and hatred directed her way, that made me feel useless. Was it not my place to protect those I love and care for? I stopped short at my musing.

Did I just say - well think, that I lo...I couldn't even say it. It was too far fetched and even if I did think that, it was much too soon to be even contemplating such things in my head let alone even dream of saying them aloud.

The words my father had spoken to one the first night we had come here raced through my brain, '...Take love wherever you can...love comes in strange packages...with time and patience you could have something similar to what me and your mother share…'

Was this true? Could I - no _did_ I love Bella? I looked down at the girl in my arms that had fallen asleep and furrowed my brow. I had never been in love per say, I had cared for and loved Tanya deeply, but I had realized a long time ago that I had not been _in_ love with her.

Could Bella be that one missing piece in my life? Could I even fall in love with her - If I had not already? Looking down at her, I realized that maybe I could love her. I had never felt the way I did with Bella before, but with all the strange circumstances, I had passed them off as something else.

I relaxed back into the padded cushions of the carriage and smiled. Yes, it was possible that I had deeper feeling for Bella than I cared to admit at this time. Now, all I had to worry about was trying to get her to feel the same way.

**AN: I think there was enough plot in this one to make up for the last chapter...not that you guys minded and who knows...maybe I'll get bored again soon if you know what I mean *wiggles eyebrows*. Anyway, Review!**


	16. Chapter 16

**AN: Guess what guys...I was bored :) It took me forever to write this chapter. It just went on and on. Thanks for all the great reviews!**

I tossed and turned in my bed, the sheets tangling around my legs as I slept fitfully. We had arrived back at my estate just past midnight and had immediately crashed in our separate beds, too tired to even think. All I had managed to do was strip off all my clothes and crawl into bed before my eyes had shut on their own accord and taken me into the abyss of sleep.

It had only been in the early hours of the morning when my sleep had been disturbed by dreams and flickering pictures in my head. I had thought that I had put all my thoughts to rest the day before, but it seemed like some things just would not let my mind be at ease.

I arched my hips as a groan fell from my lips and I gripped the pillow above my head tightly in my grasp. I knew I shouldn't be thinking about this, let alone dreaming about it, but the images were... arousing to say the least. Just seeing her kneeling between my legs, her big, doe eyes staring up at me as she slid her mouth up and down coating me in her saliva and surrounding me in wet, heat made me throb.

My engorged erection had already woken me many times and it was only through extensive control and evasiveness that I had suppressed the urge to take myself in hand and get rid of it, something that would be immoral and so so wrong.

I could hear the throbbing in my ears as it thumped in time with my heartbeat and tried to rid myself of the images running through my brain. I was begging her, saying words that were coarse and something no lady should be exposed to, as she teased me with her tongue and mouth.

My skin was all hot and prickly as I laid my hand on my stomach, scratching lightly at the skin. I moaned loudly and rolled my hips into thin air seeking friction I knew was not there.

"Edward?" I could hear a voice, but it seemed to be coming from so far off that I simply ignored it. I felt warm skin touch mine and shake me, trying to drag me away from my sleep. I let out one last groan before I opened my eyes.

I blinked for a second adjusting my eyes to the darkness that I was met by. The curtains were still closed, but I could see a tiny bit of light filtering through it. I looked around trying to find the source of the disturbance and found Bella kneeling on the bed beside me.

It was then that I noticed three things simultaneously. One, in my restlessness the sheets had been trampled and shoved around leaving only my hips and upper thighs covered. Two, I was painfully aroused and my erection was practically peeking out of the sheets. Three, the hand that had been on my stomach had somehow moved downwards so that it rested just centimeters from my manhood, which I think I mentioned earlier, was erect.

I shot up in my bed and grabbed my sheets pulling them more firmly around me, trying fruitlessly to cover my swollen manhood. I wiped my hand across my mouth to wipe off any drool that had dripped from my mouth while I was sleeping and ran the other hand through my hair. I felt my skin heat up as a dark blush spread across my skin and I averted my eyes making sure to avoid any eye contact.

"Um...Bella, what are you doing in here?" I asked after clearing my throat. She was silent for a second and I chanced a peek at her to see that she was frowning at me. I swallowed heavily and prayed to God that I had not been talking in my sleep. I always talked in my sleep when I was restless and if today was no different than I severely hoped that she had only just entered my room.

"You looked restless so I thought that I should wake you up. Also it's quite late and I wasn't sure if you wanted to be up by lunch or not."

I let out a cautious breath that I had not been aware that I was holding and smiled, "Yes, I would very much like to awake before lunch. Thank you Bella." She nodded, but was still eyeing me in what I could only describe as a curious way. I shifted uncomfortably under her gaze and fingered the edge of the sheets bunched up in my lap.

"You were quite vocal in my sleep," she added and I closed my eyes and grimaced. Great, she had heard all the sick things I had said in my sleep. If she had been here for a while, I knew she would know exactly what I had been dreaming about. I cursed under my breath and tugged at my hair.

She would probably want nothing to do with a sick bastard like me. Why was it when my life was just going well that something like this would happen?

"What did I say?" I asked in a defeated tone, no hope was in it at all.

She was silent for a minute before she answered, "Well you said my name quite a bit mixed in with some groaning and cursing…," she paused and I waited with bated breath for her to finish, "You may have asked me, in your sleep, to maybe put my mouth on you?" She poised it as a question and I groaned loudly and cursed before lying back down and flinging my arm across my eyes.

She would leave now and go back into her room, probably fearing for the time we were next intimate and you know the worst part? I deserved it! I shouldn't have even been thinking about something so...wrong and lustful.

"Edward." Her timid voice came from beside me and wondered what she was still doing in here. I didn't answer, too embarrassed to face her right now. She tugged at my arm trying to pry it away from my face so that I would look at her. I did not budge an inch and after a few minutes, she gave up with a sigh.

"Edward, there is no need to be embarrassed. Everyone has needs." Embarrassed? I was not embarrassed. The word to describe how I felt was borderline mortification. I felt sick at how understanding she was trying to be about this and I pulled my arm away from my face and stared up at her.

"Bella, my needs do not include what I dreamt of last night," I said getting frustrated. I frowned and sat up again, not quite believing the fact through all of this my erection had not gone down. I really was sick.

"So you're saying that you don't want me to do that?" My heart stuttered and I felt my manhood twitch in anticipation of my answer. I remembered how it felt in my dream and however tempting it sounded; it was not something I would subject her to.

"Exactly," I said firmly trying to close the subject.

"And if I want to?" she asked quietly. My eyes darted to where she was sitting, a blush staining her cheeks and her eyes fixed on her hands, surprise raced through me.

"Why would you want to?" I asked in disbelief. I knew that Bella had been educated in how to act as a woman and I was extremely sure that this did not qualify as something any woman would want to do.

"Why not?" she asked straightening up and looking me in the eye, "It's not like you didn't do it for me," I sighed, there we have it. It seemed that no amount of her telling her that she did not have reciprocate everything I did for her would be enough to convince her. Moreover, she had paid me back for it.

"This is a completely different situation Bella. I did what I did for you because I wanted to; you're doing this because I indirectly asked you to." She frowned at me and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Oh really?" she said in a clipped voice, "How do you know that I'm not doing it because I want to? I do have a mind for myself Edward. I know you think I'm naive and that I don't know what I want, but just because I say something and you don't believe it; it doesn't mean that I don't mean it."

I arched my brows at her and leaned back on my hands.

"So you're saying that if I asked you right now to put your mouth on me, then you would do it?"

She hesitated for a second before answering, "Yes."

I snorted and shook my head. Maybe she could fool herself, but she was not fooling me for one second. "Right, of course you would. It's just as well; I'm not going to let you anyway." I pulled the sheets around my waist and made a move to stand up.

She grabbed my arm and pulled me back down, "No, you are not walking away from this right now. We have to talk about this some more." I looked away from her and clenched my jaw tightly together.

"There is nothing to talk about."

She sighed in frustration, "Oh, I think there is. Just give one good reason why you won't let me do it."

I pursed my lips together and turned towards her. "I could give you more than one good reason why you shouldn't do it. One, it's wrong. Two, it's demeaning. Three, it could be dangerous. Four, you have no idea what to do...do you need anymore?"

She gritted her teeth together and cocked her head at me, "So you're saying that when you put your mouth on me, you found it demeaning."

I narrowed my eyes into slits, "Now you're just twisting my words. I never said that."

She shrugged non-chalently, "Actually, you'll find that you did. If it is demeaning for me to do it, then it is demeaning for you to do it. You can't just change things around."

I gritted my teeth more firmly together, "That was different," I hissed.

Her eyes blazed with fire and her upper lip curled backwards, "How?"

That question threw off my guard for a second. How was it different? I quickly composed myself and answered in a cool voice, "Because I'm a man."

She looked at me with disgust, "So because you are a man you can demean yourself, but because I'm a woman then I can't. Well, I guess we are not equal in this relationship Edward! Would you like me to make your bed as well while you're at it? Hmm...Or maybe just lie here and spread my legs so you can do whatever you want with me."

Her words came out harsh and I grimaced realizing the error of my words. "I didn't mean it like that and you know it," I said annoyed.

She raised her eyebrows, "Oh really, I do, do I? And here I was thinking that I couldn't think for myself."

I could not believe we were having an argument about something so stupid! Did this even matter? Oh, who was I kidding, I knew I wanted this, she knew that I wanted this, according to her, she wanted it too and the only thing stopping this from coming to pass was my own pride and stubbornness.

I sighed knowing that she was not going to back down. If I had learnt anything by being with Bella, it was that she had a nasty stubborn streak.

I think she could tell that I was backing down because a triumphant smile lit up on her face.

"So, will you let me?" She asked her voice softening from her earlier harsh tone.

I sighed again and ran a hand through my hair. "Fine, seeing as you want to so much, you can try. Just try to keep your teeth away from it. It's an appendage I actually quite like."

She grinned and pushed me backwards until I was lying down. She kneeled in between my legs and tugged the sheet down to reveal my erect manhood. She bit her lip and wrapped one of her hands around the base. I groaned and flexed my hips.

She seemed encouraged by this and leaned forwards until her face was so close that I could feel the heat of her breath on me. She chewed on her lip thoughtfully before peeking her tongue out and touching it gingerly. She ran her tongue up the underside and I groaned and forced my hips not to buck upwards as I didn't want her to lose an eye or something.

The heat of her tongue on me was like balm on a sore. I'd thought her hand was warm and that she'd had a strong grip, but it did not compare to her mouth. I was not going to last long.

My hands itched to wrap themselves in her hair as she kept on licking me so I dug them into the mattress beneath me and clung on for dear life. My hips trembled and I focused all my attention on keeping them still. I was so busy trying to keep my bodies natural reflexes in check that I didn't notice when she put the tip in her mouth.

Every grasp of control I had before, vanished and a stream of curses left my lips as my hips buckled wildly.

I sat up and pushed her off me as she gagged and started choking.

"Bella, you can't just do things like that!" I abolished. She managed to stop coughing and gave me a sheepish look.

"Sorry, I think I got a bit ahead of myself." I shook my head and sighed, "I don't think we should do this."

She huffed and pushed me back down, "Edward, it's not going to be perfect the first time, but we have to work on it. Not everyone can do things perfectly the first time they do it." She smiled at me silently telling me that she was okay.

Wait a minute; did she say the first time? She intended to do this act again in the near future?

I eyed her carefully as she lowered her head down again, all the while keeping eye contact as she opened her mouth and lowered it. "Remember - no teeth." I said just as she wrapped her lips around the tip again. She looked up at me and nodded.

She sucked on me and ran her tongue over the head extracting a strangled moan from me.

Not able to look at her anymore I slammed my eyes closed knowing that at the rate I was going I would not able to last long. I could feel her slowly taking more of me into her mouth and enveloping me in wet heat. She started a slow rhythm of bobbing up and down on me and I gritted my teeth together in an effort not to tell her just how good that felt.

As nice as her mouth felt on me, I needed more. My hips were trembling harshly, literally begging me to let my slipping control go, so they could take what they needed from her. I sat up and wound my hands into her thick, brown hair. I started controlling her movements, bringing her head up and down, so that she was going a speed that would bring me to release quickly.

She looked up at me through her eyelashes and it was as if I had been transported back into my dream. A wave of lust ran through my body and I let my head fall back in ecstasy.

"Bella…," I groaned. I started massaging her scalp wanting her to be as comfortable as possible throughout this whole act.

Never and I mean never, would I have thought a few months ago that any of this would be possible. Just to feel her hot mouth around me made me realize that even though this whole thing had started off as nothing more than a quest to stop the fighting and bring peace, I had found a lot more.

I was brought out of my lustfully awed thoughts by Bella's teeth scraping up against me. I hissed at the sting it created and jerked my hips. I had been so caught up in my thoughts - something I knew should be an impossibility - that I had not noticed that the tightening in my stomach had reached its peak and that my release would be eminent in a matter of seconds.

Jumping into action, I pulled her head away from me by her hair forcefully and managed to unwind my hands from her hair just in time for her to fall off the side of the bed and onto the floor with a thump. Before I could even think about trying to rescue her from her newfound predicament my orgasm overtook me.

My back arched and I moved my still outstretched arms into my hair, successfully anchoring myself as everything started spinning. I felt disconnected from my body as the sensations of euphoria ran through my veins. My eyes slammed shut as I tightened my jaw to stop the flood of curses from escaping. This felt different from when I released inside her. It felt raw, more animalistic.

It made me feel more vulnerable knowing that she was probable looking at me at a time when I couldn't t control my actions. My hands clenched harder into my hair and the pain in my scalp just added to the feelings shooting through me.

I can feel my seed shooting out of me, landing on my stomach and when my body finally felt spent, I collapsed back against the bed panting. I kept my eyes closed and let out another moan as my skin buzzed.

"Edward?" I can hear someone calling me, but its all background noise. "Edward?" Hot skin touches my shoulder and starts shaking me, pulling me away from the blanket of post-coital bliss.

I slowly opened my eyes and blinked. I stretched my numb muscles and look over next to me to find Bella kneeling next to me on the bed, a concerned look on her face. "Are you okay?" She asked and I just lay there blinking up at her fruitlessly trying to gather up a coherent thought.

"You really scared for a second there." She said frowning and confusion started to cloud my brain. Had what happened before been real? Had it all been an elaborate dream conjured up by the most deprived part of my brain?

I looked down half expecting to find the sheets wrapped around my waist and a throbbing erection between my legs. What I saw made me let out a breath of relief and smile lazily up at her. Never had it felt so good to have my seed all over my stomach.

"I'm fine." I murmured huskily still trying to get feeling into my joints. She smiled and rubbed her head slightly and it's then that I noticed that her hair was like a nest around her head. I leaned up my elbows and ran a hand through her hair feeling slightly embarrassed for practically throwing her off the bed.

"How are you?" I asked seriously, knowing that she liked to down play things.

She shrugged and smiled, "I'm okay. I've had worse than a slight bump on the head." Her eyes flashed before she refocused her attention on my stomach. She leaned over me and dipped her finger in my seed. She held it up in front of her and looked at it with a completive look on her face before opening her mouth and sucking her finger into her mouth.

I stared at her in shock as she pulled it out of her mouth and frowned slightly, seeming deep in thought. Her mouth twisted slightly before flicking her tongue out of her mouth.

"Hmmm...It tastes like you. I didn't expect that. It's kind of salty though and musky, but not in a bad way." I sat up forcing her back, grabbed her face between my hands and forced my lips harshly against hers. She tensed slightly before relaxing completely into me.

I pulled back and looked at her in complete awe. I knew for certain that there was not another like her on the whole of God's green earth.

"I adore you." I murmured my fingers carressing her face. "Everything you do makes me want you more." I told her truthfully. She smiled softly and closed her eyes, leaning her face further into my touch. "And I care for you, Edward...deeply." I pressed our lips back together softly and sighed contentedly. Though I knew neither of us were ready to say those three words that seemed to be on the tip of my tongue every time I opened my mouth. I knew that this, what we had, was enough for now.

**AN: I can tell you for sure that I am not feeling bored anymore and I hope you guys aren't either. So leave me a review and we'll see what happens next week. **


	17. Chapter 17

"I give up!" Bella exclaimed as she pricked herself with her needle for what I could say was the fifteenth time. She threw down the embroidery she had been sewing - or should I say trying to sew - and sucked her pricked finger into her mouth.

"This is impossible. Embroidery was made for women who had nothing better to do with their time than sit around like a potato, boring themselves to death."

I chuckled at her annoyed expression and she narrowed her eyes at me. "What exactly do you find so funny about this situation Edward?"

I looked up at her from where I lay on my side reading a book of poetry. Bella had woken me up early this morning citing that she wanted to go out to explore more of the grounds and that we should take a picnic with us. Which brought us to this point, where I was getting a hole burned into my head by Bella's glare.

I really did not understand why she was being so sensitive over the fact that I had laughed, but alas, hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

"I'm sorry," I said trying to look apologetic while keeping the smile off my face, "But you're just too cute when you're angry." I threw in a winning smile and a smoldering look hoping to muddle up her thoughts enough for her not to see through me.

Her eyes glazed over and I was about to give myself a pat on the back when she shook her head, effectively ending it and gave me a hard look. "Nice try Edward, but you forget that I spent quite a bit of time with your sisters. They have informed me of all your tricks." She said this so matter of factly that I had to pout.

She giggled at my face and swatted my arm. "Stop looking at me like that." She chided playfully.

I chuckled and grinned up at her, "So tell me dear, now that you have finally decided that embroidery is not one of your strong points. What exactly do you intend to do now?" I teased wiggling my eyebrows suggestively.

She looked at me with an amused look on her face, "Edward, you have already taken me once this morning. I think you are turning into an insatiable creature." I shrugged unapologetically.

"I am but a man Bella, and you are, if you do not mind me saying so, a very fine looking young lady."

She blushed wildly at my comment and looked away, "No, I don't mind, but please focus on the point of the conversation. I still find it rather unbelievable that you could want me again so quickly."

I rolled my eyes and turned back to my book, "That, my dear, is because women have the tendency to underestimate men. Why do you think it is that men sometimes look elsewhere for their needs to be met? While I do not agree with it, I think that if women truly knew how many men enjoyed their presence in the bedroom, there would be a lot less infidelity on both parts. Men tend to think that women do not enjoy the activities in the bedroom and only do them because they think it is their duty."

She snorted, "Oh - please, don't tell me that you believe that drivel. Men who take someone from outside of the marriage are pigs. That is a common fact. Plus, if I may remind you, men happen to have problems expressing themselves; I don't see why it would be any different in the bedroom."

I raised my eyebrows at Bella, not expecting her to be so forward about this subject, but I guess it's rather hard not to be on this particular subject. I shook my head, "If you are saying that men's performances are lacking because of our seemingly lack of expression, I can assure that I really do not have a problem expressing myself, sexually and otherwise."

She ducked her head but not before I saw the smirk on her face, "You needn't worry Edward. I am very aware that you have no problems expressing yourself. You did show me this morning, did you not?"

I chuckled, "Well what can I say? I feel that expression of self should be exercised in every part of my life, but getting back to the point. I must say that women are not that straightforward when it comes to their feelings."

"Whatever do you mean by that?" Bella questioned looking baffled.

I smirked, "Oh, don't give me that. Women have that annoying tendency to say the exact opposite of what they mean and please, do not get me started on your tendencies to sigh and look longing into the distance. If that isn't not expressing your true feelings than I suggest you take a closer look." I gave her a self-satisfied look while she stared a little dumbfounded. Her mouth opened and closed for a minute before she answered.

"We do it because we must test our partners observing skills. I mean, you should be able to notice our strange behavior and notice that something is out of place. You are then meant to ask us what the problem is, in which case we reluctantly tell you. Women have good reason to hide their feeling at such times that we do. We do not like making scenes of jealousy and wrath."

I raised my eyebrow at her, "That completely contradicts the point you were trying to make before. You said men lack emotion, but now you are implying that we like to make scenes of jealousy and wrath. That counts as emotion." I said triumphantly.

She scowled at me, "You're right. Men do not lack all emotions, but the emotions they do tend to have, never get them anywhere good. Lust, jealousy, and anger, these are not positive emotions and they tend to control men's action."

I snorted, "Oh, please. Lust does not control a man. A man lets himself be controlled by it."

She raised her eyebrows with a smirk, "So if I was to initiate something, or let's say I seduced you, then would you be able to resist me." I opened my mouth to argue, but she crawled over and leaned over me. "Think of me naked and writhing underneath you Edward." She murmured seductively. "Imagine my mouth teasing you to the edge." I swallowed convulsively as she placed her hand on the bulge protruding from my trousers. Her fingers flexed and she leaned her head down until it was mere centimeters from my face.

She flicked her tongue and ran it across her lips. "You taste so good," she murmured, her voice lowering to almost a moan and then just like that she was gone.

I blinked for a second and looked over to the right where she sat grinning at me, "Can I have a pony Edward?"

I opened my mouth to tell she could have anything she liked as long as she got back here and finished what she started, but managed to stop myself as I realized that I had almost fallen into her trap. I frowned, as she started giggled and shifted uncomfortably.

"That wasn't nice Bella." I reprimanded and shook my head. "You act like I could not do the same to you and have that affect. It's one of nature's most natural weapons."

She covered her mouth and smiled at me. "So, do I win?" I frowned and muttered obscenities under my breath.

"You always seem to win," I muttered and turned my attention back to my book. She hummed in agreement.

"It's one of the many things God gave to women. The ability to win arguments should not be taken lightly," she teased.

I smiled and sat up, "Yes, but the ability to tease me and then just leave me in my current situation is just cruel." I pouted and she just giggled some more.

She stood up and walked over to me before plopping down in my lap facing me. She laced her fingers in my hair and grinned at me, "Prey tell me Edward. How do you wish for me to relieve your suffering?" she asked.

I twirled a lock of her hair around my fingers and looked up at her from under my eyelashes, "I have a few ideas." I murmured huskily.

Just as I opened my mouth to tell just some of the options she had to relieve my suffering, the heavens opened and poured down a steady amount of rain. We both groaned simultaneously. Blast this bad English weather!

We hurried to gather up all the things and place them in the picnic basket before running for cover under the nearby trees. As we ducked under the wide canopies of trees, Bella tripped and let out an unsavory word. She clutched her ankle tightly between her hands and grimaced.

"I think I may have sprained my ankle," she said.

Without any further thought, I placed the basket on the floor and swung Bella into my arms. She wrapped her arms around my neck as I supported her body. I managed to crouch down enough to gather the basket up and ran at a steady pace back towards the house.

If we stayed out here for much longer, we would surely catch our deaths.

For once in many months, I was rather glad that I had been in the army. It was there that I had learned to carry such heavy weights while moving continuously. Before, I would not have been able to go at such a fast pace with a woman in my arms. Then again, there probably would not have been a woman in my arms.

It was not long before I reached the steps of my manor and was standing in the foyer dripping water everywhere.

"Alistair would please call on the doctor as Miss Swan fell and hurt herself," I said calmly. He nodded and hurried off just as Sue came out. "Sue, could you please heat up some soup and fetch some extra blankets?" She nodded and disappeared the way she had come.

I walked swiftly up the stairs until I reached my bedroom. Bella's head was pressed deep into my chest and her breathing was shallow. Her arms wrapped around my neck were weakened. I quickly laid her on my bed and saw that she was unconscious.

I hurriedly stripped her clothes off and fetched her nightgown. Once I had deemed her presentable, I sat by her on the bed and held her hand. Anxiousness rattled through my body and I tugged at my hair relentlessly.

I hardly even registered the fact that my clothes were soaked through as I stroked her cold hand in hopes that maybe; just maybe she would be okay.

****

AN: I know, I know, Worst place ever to finish the chapter, but really I need to keep you guys on your toes. I wonder if Bella will be okay . Now - review so you can see what happens next.


	18. Chapter 18

**AN:The next chapter!**

"I hate this," she muttered lazily as I ran a hand up her naked calf. I chuckled and shifted a little closer.

"And why is that love?" I asked.

She gave me an incredious look. "Take a good look Edward. I'm totally useless and you're waiting on me hand and foot!"

I raised my eyebrow and took a good look, feeling thankful that the water in the bathtub that she now resided in, was clear. Her bandaged foot hung loosely over the side of it and she sat sulking as I tended to her.

"I have taken a good look at you love, in fact more than one; and as for waiting on you, I really do not mind. It's nice to take care of you." She seemed to relax a little more at that and sighed again, more contentedly this time as I let my hand snake up past her knee. She unconsciously moved it further to the right and leaned back against the back of the tub closing her eyes.

My fingers danced over the skin of her thigh teasing and elevating her state of arousal. A small smile played on her lips as she opened one eye. "What are you doing Edward?" she asked causing me to grinned up at her.

I shifted so that I was by her head, my hand still on her thigh, and leaned down and kissed her on the mouth softly. She lifted her hands out of the water and wound them in my hair, dripping water on me. I was thankful that I had decided to do this without a shirt because I was sure it would have been sodden by now. After a few minutes I pulled back and looked her in the eye.

"The doctor said that strenuous activities were not allowed, but I thought that maybe we could still have some fun." I let my eyes smolder and I was pleased when her breath hitched. My fingers ran up her thigh until they were mere inches away from where - I was sure - we both wanted to them to be.

"You realize that you are taking advantage of an invalid," she teased, I leaned down and ran a few kisses along her jaw.

"Hmmm...I didn't see you protesting," I murmured and she opened her mouth to respond with what I was sure would a witty response, but I effectively cut her off by grazing her folds softly.

Surprise registered in her beautiful features as she tensed before gasping. I chuckled against her jaw and moved my attention further south to her neck.

"Please Edward…," she whimpered as my fingers danced back down to her thigh pretending that they hadn't just been touching the promise land.

"What do you want love?" I murmured, a grin fixed on my face as I nuzzled her neck. She shifted and tried to move her legs so that she could rub them together. She failed of course and ending up just cursing under breath.

I pulled back, "You know you have a very dirty mouth on you," I said with an eyebrow raised, "Maybe I should wash your mouth out with soap."

She shot me a look, "Oh please, I only started because you tend to do it so much. You're a bad influence on me," she sniffed and held her head high.

I frowned, "I don't curse - much." Her lip twitched and her cheeks darkened,

"Actually when we are intimate, curses is one of the only things coming out of your mouth."

I gave her an incredulous look. "You can't blame that on me. I'm not concentrating when we're intimate, I'm reacting as naturally as any man would," she giggled lightly.

"Still, you curse at least twenty times a day," I shrugged knowing this conversation was going nowhere quickly.

"Why are we arguing about cursing when I have a beautiful woman spread out here just begging to be touched?"

She blushed, still unused to hearing compliments, "I wouldn't say begging," she murmured.

I smiled and went back to peppering her neck with kisses. "Love, by the time I'm done with you, you will be."

I grazed my fingers over her folds again and her hips jumped up in response and she gripped the sides of the tub in her grip. She moaned low and throatily as I felt my own arousal rise.

"Tell me what you want." I whispered huskily and started moving my mouth south again. My lips trailed over her collarbone and I paused minutely to suck on it before continuing downwards to the hardened peaks waiting to be taken into my mouth and lavished with attention.

"You know what I want," she shot back.

I removed my hand completely and looked up at her from where my mouth was hovering centimeters from her nipples. "Yes, but I want you to tell me what you want."

I knew it was a big step getting her to actually ask me to give what I knew she wanted, but every time I touched her, I always had this slight feeling that she didn't really want it. I wanted her to tell me she wanted it and it wasn't by duty - a word that I was severely starting to hate - that she was doing it.

My insatiable need to have her in every single way possible sometimes got in the way of seeing what she wanted, what she needed. I felt selfish for always forcing my way into every aspect of her life, but I couldn't, no wouldn't regret doing it, not when it brought so much clarity and happiness into my life.

She sat up and moved backwards away from me. Her expression was guarded and slightly nervous. "What are you asking of me?" she asked quietly.

I sighed thinking that I pushed her to far and made her uncomfortable. I sat back and drew up one of my knees against my chest. I leaned my head on it and looked her straight in the eye. It was time to come clean.

"I am asking you to tell me that this is what you really want. Not something that you feel you must do out of necessity, but out want and desire." She gave me the look that she usually gave me when she thought I was being obtuse and I could understand that my wanting confirmation about our sexual deeds and intercourse must be tiring and irksome, but that niggling doubt refused to leave me be.

She leaned forwards slightly and it took all my strength not to look down at the ample breasts swaying gently with every movement that she made. She placed her hands on my cheeks and pulled me forwards so that our lips touched. This was like most of the kisses she had incited. They had been gentle, soft caresses of our lips, but this kiss held such fire, such passion that it was impossible for me to think that she held no desire for me.

Our lips moved against each other and her hands slid into my hair and tugged my head backwards. She was breathing heavily and she looked directly in to my eyes, "I want you Edward. Never doubt that. So will you please touch me and relieve the ache you have created between my thighs."

I slammed my mouth back against hers and I let my hands move determinedly. One rested on the ample flesh of her breasts that I had yet to give my attention to, while the other went to the apex of her thighs. Not bothering to tease her this time I dove my fingers directly into her heat. Her body jerked at the sudden intrusion before she groaned into my mouth. My fingers worked quickly inside of her whilst I placed my thumb on the knot at the top of her womanhood and rubbed it vigorously.

My other hand kneaded her breast roughly not sparing any desperation. Knowing that it could be a full week before we could be together intimately fueled me to bring her to unimaginable heights. If we could not have mutual gratification, as we did during intercourse, we could at least have this.

My usual gentle touch could not be found anywhere inside me and it was only sheer control that I hadn't turned into a wild caveman that couldn't control himself. I drew my mouth away from hers and brought it down to where her neglected breast was.

The dual feeling of my fingers working vigorously on her sensitive skin and my mouth caressing her breast caused her once subdued whimpers and moans to become full out screams of pleasure.

I pulled my head back making sure that my hands carried on their work and whispered in her ear, "Do you like this Bella?" I asked innocently like her screams couldn't tell me enough information on that. She nodded vigorously and I slowed my finger down.

"Say it - out loud," I said as she squirmed frustratedly trying to get me to quicken the pace of my fingers again.

"Yes," she moaned, frustration clear on her features, "Please don't stop. I need more."

My fingers resumed their pace from earlier. "How does it feel?" I asked when she frowned and opened her mouth to speak, but I must have hit some secret spot as I curled my fingers because her mouth hung open silently and her eyes scrunched up.

"Oh god Edward!" she exclaimed, "It feels so good, like you're consuming me and I can't think straight." I kissed her mouth gently and pulled back.

"Cum for me, my love," I murmured and she immediately gripped my fingers in a tight hold. I kept moving them even as she arched her back and came screaming my name.

I pulled my fingers out of her and sat back to wait for her to calm down. I focused on her heaving chest and once it slowed its pace, I heard her clear her throat. I looked up at her unapologetically and grinned.

"How are you feeling," I asked and she smiled lazily at me.

"Um...euphoric, happy, like I could conquer the world," I chuckled and kissed her forehead.

"That's good. The doctor will be by tomorrow and if he sees you in such a happy state he's bound to tell you that you can have more strenuous activities." She hit my shoulder in mock reproach fullness and smiled.

"Don't even try that one. Now help me out this bath before I wrinkle up like a prune." I fetched her a towel and helped her balance on one foot while I wrapped her up before slinging her into my arms and placing her on the bed.

She looked so small and frail laying on the bed in a big towel and I frowned. "You need to eat more."

She shrugged unperturbed by my comment and changed the subject, "Would you like me to help me with your little problem?" She asked eyeing my bulging trousers.

I shook my head, "First there is nothing small about my problem and second, no I'm okay at the moment. I have some things I need to sort out downstairs." The last part was a lie, but I didn't want her to reciprocate my actions.

She looked at me suspiciously before deciding to let it go.

"Fine, but tomorrow you are going to have one hell of an org...whatever they're called, whether you like it or not." I chuckled and kissed her forehead.

"You won't hear any complaints coming from me love, none at all."

With that I kissed her forehead and tucked her into bed. "Sleep," I ordered and made my way over to the door and took one last look at the small, fragile girl that was my future.

**AN: Sorry I had writer's block for this chapter and this was the best I could come up with. Review and tell me how I did. I'm not sure if there will be a chapter next week, but I'll just have to see.**

**If you haven't already, go check out my new story that is a continuation of my one shot 'First Time.' It's called Parental Guardian. **

**Summary:** Ever had a fantasy about a Father figure? Possibly your own?I have and still do. Ten years older and still sexy. Fell in love with him. Legal? No. Amazing? Yes. Now its time to pull it together and make him fall in love llab with SpunkRansom101 ExB mature


	19. Chapter 19

**AN: Horrors of all horrors! This chapter has plot! I think this one of the chapters you have been waiting for. Its kind of angsty in an Edward way. Thanks for all the epic reviews! Also thanks to my beta for making this read-worthy.**

I sat staring out at the moon that was shining brightly down on the bed. We had been so caught up earlier that I had forgotten to close the drapes. I sighed as I looked over at Bella sleeping beside her. The look of peacefulness on her face calmed me slightly, but it did not stop the thoughts from coming.

Her body was wrapped in sheets and she was snuggled into my side. I smiled sadly knowing that I would have to tell her soon. I knew I shouldn't keep something like this to myself, but to actually say it aloud could mean that I would actually have to accept it and that it could come true.

My fingers dug into the mattress underneath me and my eyes trailed over Bella taking her in again. She looked so small and delicate lying there with not care in the world. It was only now that I was truly seeing how young and frail she really was.

Her body was so small and petite, not fully grown into the woman she was becoming. I knew that this would happen, in fact, this was the reason we were both here, in my bed. But, to hear the doctor tell that if Bella did not bleed in the next week that it would mean she would have missed two cycles had dumbfounded me.

It was then that all the symptoms that she had been having flooded my mind. Fatigue, queasiness, erratic behavior; the signs had all been there and yet I had ignored them. I think that maybe I did not want to see them because if I did then it could possibly mean the end of me.

My throat choked up at that thought and I pushed myself out of bed not able to just sit there any longer. I strode over to the balcony doors and opened them. My chest had constricted and I grabbed the edge of the railings tightly in my hands and squeezed it until my knuckles turned white. I felt like screaming up to the heavens and asking God why he would do such a thing to me.

She was so small and young, what happened if she was too small to carry the baby? So many things could go wrong, there was so many ways that she could be taken away from me. I closed my eyes to try to push the feel of a dagger ripping through me away.

Images of Tanya broke through the carefully bound safe that I had placed them in and my knees nearly buckled underneath under the weight of the crushing pain.

I saw her lying lifeless on our bed. Blood on every surface, her eyes cold and blank and she stared up at me. I could see the midwife carrying the baby past me, covered in blood and other things.

That creature had killed her. It was something we had made together, something that had turned against us and taken her away.

A sob tore itself from my throat and I wrapped an arm around myself trying to defend myself from the onslaught of pain. I had thought I would be able to do this, that I could put all my feelings away and do this. I should have known that it would be impossibility. Someone as warm and as kind as Bella could not be taken touched, without feeling.

I knew I should be dwelling on the brighter aspects of this situation, but every time I tried, I knew that either way I would probably lose her. If not by death ripping her from my fingertips then her leaving to go back to her old life. Maybe not until he grew up, but still she could never be mine like I wanted her to be and that thought alone killed me.

I fell to my knees, my grief to crushing to be able to be held up. I ignored the pain that shot through my knees as I landed on the hard ground and buried my face into my hands

I had not voiced my insecurities to anyone on this because I felt like it was my burden to bear. These thoughts had enslaved my mind so much, that I could barely enjoy the fact that Bella and I could once again be intimate.

I don't know if she could tell that I was distracted during our intercourse this evening and I had been glad when she fell asleep soon after so she would not question the look of pain etched into my face.

I stiffened as I felt a hand brush against my arm and grip my shoulder firmly.

"Edward?" She questioned her voice unsure. I felt no pride for the situation she had found me in. Me, on my knees, naked, my face in my hands. I didn't answer knowing that no

words would be able to come out of my mouth.

"Edward!" Her voice sounded scared now. "Tell me what's wrong." She pleaded. I let my hands drop to my sides, but my head remained down. She moved around me and knelt before me. Her hands grasped my face and tried to pull it upwards. My whole body felt like a dead weight but I managed to lift my head enough to meet her eyes.

She cupped my face between her hands, "Tell me what's wrong." She repeated her voice no higher than a whisper.

I opened my mouth to tell that I was fine and that she should go back to bed before she caught a cold, but I was not prepared for what actually left my mouth.

"Don't leave me." I whispered closing my eyes again, not wanting to see her reaction to my words. Silence resounded between the two of us; the only noise was the sound of the wind blowing through the trees.

Her fingers tightened on my face and she wrapped her arms around my waist. "Oh Edward..." She murmured. "I'm not going anywhere." I shook my head as she placed her head on my chest. She did not understand.

I stroked one of my hands up and down her bare back. I buried my head in her hair and told her.

"You might be pregnant." I whispered. She stiffened in my arms and I waited with bated breath for her reaction. She pulled away from me, her expression guarded.

"What?" She whispered fear laced in her voice. I looked away from her.

"You could be pregnant." I saw her shake her head in disbelief. "You don't know that." She insisted. I looked at her intently. The range of emotions running across her face was enough to make my head spin, but they all centered around one.

She was afraid.

She wrapped her arms around her stomach and looked at the floor.

"I can't be. I...I...cannot do this Edward. I'm not ready." It seemed strange to me that I had been thinking the exact same thing. I realized that I had been too wrapped to see that maybe she just was not ready or prepared for this, just as I was not.

I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her flush against my chest. I could feel wet hit my chest as tears fell down her face and I buried my head into her neck.

"I know you can't do this Bella." I murmured. "That's why you have me. We are in this together and somehow we'll get through it." I said these words to convince myself as well as her.

"Wh...What if I don't make it?" She whispered tearfully and my chest constricted as she gripped my tightly in her fists and sobbed against my skin. I felt a tear slip down my chest down my cheek and I tightened my grip on her.

"Don't say that. Never say that Bella." I said harshly. "You're going to be fine."

She quieted slightly against my chest and sniffed as I repeated, "You're going to be just fine."

The wind brushed past us and she shivered in my arms. I picked her up as I stood slowly and brought her back to the bed. I lay her under the sheets before turning to close the balcony doors. I soon joined her in bed and lay facing her.

Her lips pressed against mine desperately and I responded in kind. She dug her fingers into my hair and pulled my head closer before pulling her mouth away. She leaned her forehead against mine and stared into my eyes like every unanswered questioned that she held was written in them.

"Promise me that we'll be fine, that you'll always be there, that you won't leave _me_." I nodded slowly. Even though I knew that I shouldn't promise her this, there was no way that I could keep such a promise, I knew that she needed me to tell her this. She was looking at me for some sort of direction and I could not refuse her plea.

"I promise." I whispered.

Her eyes stared into mine intently before she spoke again.

"Make love to me Edward." She murmured her eyes still glued to mine. Shock animated through my system and I stared at her. Did she know what those words meant? What significance they held? Was this her way of telling me her feelings?

"Whatever you wish, Bella, I will give to you."

I pulled her body flush against mine as I captured her lips in a passionate kiss. As our lips molded together I slid one of my legs between hers and pressed one of my hands into the small of her back.

I tore my mouth away from hers and hunted along her jaw until I came to her ear. I sucked it into my mouth gently before whispering, "I love you." Her breath hitched and she grasped my shoulders with her small hands. "As I do you." She murmured back.

My heart leapt and any lingering feelings that I had experienced earlier vanished, at least for the time being. I dragged my nose down the column of her neck only pausing to suck her pulse point. Something so vital could not be ignored at a time like this.

She arched against me pressing her chest against mine, showing through the hardening of her nipples her arousal. A breathy moan escaped her lips and I hardened in response.

Every fiber of my being longed to worship this goddess right in front of me, to touch and caress the acres of skin that presented themselves in front of me. "Edward..." She breathed and I automatically lifted my face to hers.

She slid one of her hands into my hair and closed her eyes. The moon illuminated her skin making the usual pale of her skin glow. Nothing could match the beauty that was my Bella. Never had such a perfect being been in my presence before.

Her swollen lips curved up slightly as her eyes re-opened.

"Don't look at me like that."

I raised an eyebrow in question. "You're looking at me like you're the luckiest man in the world when it's the opposite way round." I smiled and buried my head in her neck.

"I am the luckiest man in the world. I have to be if an angel such as yourself would look upon me in the way you do. I just wish I could make you mine properly." Sadness overtook me briefly, but I pushed it away refusing to be melancholy.

"What do you mean?" She asked quietly. I looked her straight in the eye and voiced my opinion.

"I wish that you could become my wife." Surprise flittered through her face and her eyes widened. "You wish...for me..." She trailed off her voice a mixture of awe and trepidation. I nodded and looked away.

"The only trouble is that without a huge bribe and a blessing of high regards it is not possible." Her face that been upturned into a smile fell and she sighed.

"It does not matter to me. As long as I have you then that is all that matters." I nodded and pressed my lips against hers. My hips moved forwards and I groaned as my manhood grazed the lips of her womanhood.

Our thoughts no longer on the disappointment of our future we preoccupied ourselves with the feel of each other's bodies under our hands and lips. Suddenly a thought occurred to me that I probably should thought of earlier and pulled away causing her to whimper.

"Do you think it's safe to have intercourse while there is a chance you could be pregnant?" I asked. She frowned momentarily, "I'm uncertain. I would have thought the doctor would have said something if it wasn't."

Never one to argue with logic I picked up where we left off. My hands kneaded her pebbled flesh greedily as I rubbed against her. She moaned and pressed her pelvis closer to mine.

"Please Edward..." She moaned. "Make love to me." Needing no further encouragement, I angled myself, using my hand, and pressed myself into her warm heat. I filled her slowly and let my eyes fall closed so I could enjoy every clench and squeeze of her muscles as I enveloped myself inside her.

She was so wet that I slid easily. I stopped when I was fully inside her and listened to her little gasps of breath as she breathed in and out. We fit together so perfectly that it never ceased to surprise me. I pulled back and started a slow pace.

My eyes flickered open and I was surprised to see her looking straight back at me. The intensity in our eyes could have set a house on fire and as our bodies moved in tandem, I knew that one day no matter what I would marry this girl.

**AN: Yeah, I know I stopped before they finished, but this chapter wasn't meant to be about smut. It was just an added thing so that they would finally admit their feelings. Now I'm sure you loved the chapter so why don't you tell me just how much! :)**


	20. Chapter 20

**AN: Some brother and sister heart-to-heart in this one. There is only one little hint of smut right at the end. I'm trying my best not to add too much smut, but the perv inside is relentless. This hasn't been beta'd so you'll have to excuse the mistakes. Thanks for the epic reviews and happy Yom Kippor !**

I smiled listening to sounds of laughter coming from the kitchen. My mother and Alice had arrived the night before and Esme and Bella had taken it upon themselves to make dinner. I was glad that Bella was distracted as we had both been tense waiting to see if by some miracle she would bleed. We both knew that the chances of her being late were not likely, but it didn't stop that little ember of hope from dying.

"What bothers you so brother?" I looked over my shoulder at Alice who had just entered the room and placed herself gracefully beside me on the piano. My fingers were still poised over the keys from where I had stopped abruptly.

I sighed and turned my gaze back to the keys and stared at them while I tried to get my thoughts in order. If there were anyone who would understand what Bella and I were going through it would be Alice.

Alice had always benn a Godsend. Out of everyone in the family she and I related the best to each other. She waited patiently for me to explain my mood and I took a deep breath. I starting moving my fingers slowly over the keys before starting to talk.

"I fear Bella may be pregnant." She nodded her expression still serious. While others would have most likely jumped on me and started spouting the congratulations, Alice knew that this was a delicate topic for me.

"Was this not the whole point of the two of you being together?" She asked quietly. I nodded," Yes." I said hesitantly, "But I never expected to become so close to her. For her to be taken away from me would surely rip me apart Alice."

She nodded and let a small smile grace her lips. "I knew you would fall for her. Does she know of your feelings?" I nodded and smiled. "We announced our true feelings two nights ago. I had not known how to voice my feelings to her, but she made her feelings clear to me and it came out easily after that."

She chuckled, "I should have known she would be the one to make the first move. Have you told her of your suspicions about a baby being on the horizon?" My smile faltered and I sighed again.

"Yes, of course. I could not keep something so vital from her. She's frightened." I paused. "When we first met I told her of Tanya and I fear that she thinks the same will happen to her."

Alice nodded and held her hands tightly in her lap. "She is right. There is so much that could go wrong." She whispered her head bowed. My hands ceased their playing immediately at her words and I berated myself for talking about this. It was known that Alice could not bear children; having such a small body meant that she no room for a child to grow. The one time she had been pregnant it had ended with a miscarriage.

"I sorry sister. I should not have been so thoughtless as to bring up this subject with you." She waved me off and smiled sadly. "It is fine Edward. I like that you feel comfortable enough with me to tell me of your problems. Children do not matter much to me. I have Jasper and he loves me just as I am and I could not ask for anything more." I nodded still concerned.

"My burdens should not be yours to carry Alice. I just wish I knew there was a way to be sure of everything." She chuckled. "I cannot tell you the future Edward, but I can tell you that as long as you love each other deeply then everything should work out for the better."

I nodded and went back to playing. I had expected her to leave, but she leaned her head on my shoulder and snuggled into me. "Something tells me that there is something else weighing on your mind."

I smiled; Alice could always sense things like that. "I wish to marry her, but it seems to be an impossible dream." Alice frowned, "Could you not write to the king and ask him for his blessing. Father knows a priest who would perform as a favour for him and with the king's blessing your marriage could be validated."

My fingers froze on the keys and looked at Alice wide-eyed. "Why did I not think of that?" I exclaimed. Of course! Father had saved Father Weber's life not that many years ago and he owed my father a favour, which he had never collected upon.

"I have always been the smarter one of the two of us." She teased. I chuckled and flung my arm around her shoulder. "Hmm, you have your moments." She giggled and pushed lightly at my chest.

I heard footsteps behind me and I twisted in my seat to see Bella standing shyly in the middle of the room. She blushed when she saw that we had noticed her, "I'm sorry, I can leave if I'm interrupting something."

I opened my mouth to tell her that she wasn't interrupting anything, but Alice beat me to it. She jumped up from beside me and I let my arm fall to my side, "No, I think we just about finished our little heart-to-heart." She said happily. Bella rewarded her with a smile of her own, but I could see by the hidden sorrow in her eyes that all was not as it seemed.

"I just came to tell you that Esme wanted to show you the cake she planning on making and if you assist her." Alice seemed to perk up at the prospect of learning how to cook and I grinned, "What about me? Don't I get to make something?" Alice gave me a look, "Dear brother the only things you have ever made in the kitchen was the time you made you mud pie in there and mum scolded you for an hour afterwards."

I pretended to look hurt. "Mud pies are an art. They are not something everyone can make. It takes great skill and practice." She laughed and skipped off without a reply. Bella came and sat by me, "What were you two talking about before I came in?" She asked as she lightly trailed her fingers over the white and black piano keys.

I shrugged, "The future." She nodded, not bothering to make a verbal answer. "How are you feeling?" I asked changing the subject. She shrugged and looked down at her fingers as they continued their trail.

"The same." She whispered sorrowfully and when she finally looked up there were tears in her eyes. "I don't know what to do Edward." She murmured and I sighed and turned my body to face her. I took both her hands in mine.

"Bella, you are going to be fine. Nothing is going to go wrong. Thinking that it will, will only cause you unwanted stress. You are going to be a great mother for our son, don't doubt that." She looked up at me with a perplexed expression.

"What if it is not a boy?" I paused and then let a grin spread across my face as a thought came to mind. "I guess we'll just have to keep trying then." I wiggled my eyebrows at her hoping to make her laugh. It didn't fail she grinned up at me no sorrow left in her eyes.

"I guess we will." She looked at me coyly from the corner of her eye. "I think we would have to make it more...interesting though." She said seductively belaying the innocent look she was trying to convey. I raised my eyebrows.

"I'm listening." I said wondering what where she was going with this. She blushed deeply and looked to make sure no one was around.

"Well, I may be innocent when it comes to the acts of intimacy, but I have heard a thing or two, here and there." I waited patiently wondering what she was suggesting we do together.

She looked down at her hands, her blush deepened even further. "You could take me...you know frombehind." She mumbled quickly merging the last words together. I raised my eyebrows; did she want me to do that? I, of course, had heard of such positions being used, but I had never done so myself, either from lack of partner or uncertainty of the exact mechanics of it was yet to be explained.

Though we had done that one position with her on top- something I wanted to try again- it had not been premeditated, infact we had stumbled upon it quite by accident. I wondered if it was as pleasurable as normal intercourse or if it was different.

"Would you like me to take you like that?" I asked hesitantly. If we were going to try something new then I would have to do a bit of research on it. It was times like this that I wished for Emmett to be around. He would most certainly know what to do.

"It shouldn't be too hard to figure out." Bella said mulling over the possibilities. "I mean it is much like the first time we made love except the opposite way round." I frowned and squinted, trying to imagine the scene she had pictured in her head.

"You know, we were facing each other instead of you being on top." I nodded warily. "We do that, but instead of me facing you, I have my back to you." I mulled over it thinking about how it might play out. Me with Bella's back pressed flush against my chest. One of her legs resting over mine...

I shifted suddenly slightly uncomfortable by the reaction my body had to my thoughts.

"Hmmm, I guess that could work." I said lowly. Her eyes darkened slightly and she smiled teasingly, "I guess we'll just have to see what sex the baby turns out to be." She said brightly before hopping up and skipping out of the room.

I frowned and looked down at my lap. That little tease!

**AN: *Sniggle* So...what did you think? Review and tell me you thoughts!**


	21. Chapter 21

**AN: Thanks for all the great reviews! Also thanks to my beta Nails233 for looking this over for me. **

I made my way quietly up the stairs, not wanting anyone to notice my absence. After Bella teased me, I had found it impossible not to think about what she propositioned me. I had finally decided to take care of my not so little problem. Which is what led me to sneaking up to my room like a naughty seventeen-year-old boy who was going to do something that he didn't want any one else to see.

My heart hammered in my chest as I silently walked down the upstairs hall, slipped into my room and closed the door behind me. I was glad everyone else was distracted in the kitchen; it made doing this so much easier.

I strode determinedly across the length until I reached the little adjoining washroom. It would give the little sense of privacy that I needed. I released myself from the confines of my trousers and let them pool around my ankles. My erection sprang up against my stomach all red and swollen.

I had not needed to resort to doing this since Bella had been with me, but with the little stunt she had pulled and the fact that we had not done anything last night as she worried about my mother hearing had added to my apparent situation.

I wrapped my hand around my erection tightly and gave it a long stroke. It was not the same as when Bella did it, but it was all I had at the moment. I kept giving myself long, hard strokes and let my mind wander.

I imagined all the different ways I could take her. I let my eyes close and let myself drift into my sweet place where there were not any stressful situations or problems. I massaged the sack at the base of my manhood and groaned loudly.

A second later, I heard an astonished gasp and my eyes snapped open to find Bella staring at me in shock.

Our eyes connected and we stared at each for a tense moment. My hand was still firmly wrapped around my manhood and wondered if I would bring more attention to it if I let it go or just stayed frozen.

"Don't stop," she whispered and I looked at her astonished. Did she want me to keep going while she watched? No, I must be mistaken. But, as I looked at her, I noticed that her pupils were dilated and her skin was flushed. Her chest was rising and falling heavily, all the signs were pointing to the fact that she found watching what I was doing arousing.

She seemed to feel my hesitation because in a few quick strides she was in front of me. Before I could say anything, she dropped down to her knees and brushed my hand away. I moved it willingly enough and she wrapped one hand around the base and engulfed me in her mouth.

I gasped in shock and held on tightly to the windowsill behind me. A groan escaped my lips as she worked me up and down with her mouth, spreading saliva all over me. It was amazing to think that this was only the second time we had ever done this with the way she was swirling her tongue over the head, making sure to tug at the skin on the underside.

My thighs trembled in their efforts to keep my hips still. Bella snaked her free hand around my thigh and pressed her hand into my buttocks. She pressed her hand forwards making my hips move with the motion. She continued urging me with her hand and it was not long before I was gently thrusting into her mouth.

The heat and friction were unbelievable; I dug my nails into the wood of the sill to keep from guiding her head. We would not have time to straighten ourselves up properly afterwards as dinner was practically upon us and Bella having messy hair was sure to raise a few knowing eyebrows.

I let my head fall back against the window and slammed my eyes shut. The guttural moans leaving my mouth told her of my enjoyment. I still could not believe that I had nearly denied her the privilege to service me with her mouth as I had done to her.

Thinking of which, that was something I would like to do again. Preferably tonight.

As I had already brought myself so close to an orgasm, I knew it would only be seconds before I exploded.

"Bella," I groaned through gritted teeth. "Hand...use your hand," it was a miraculous feat for me to manage to get out those words, but they seemed to have fallen on deaf ears as she looked up at me with her big, brown eyes.

Panic grew in me as my stomach clenched harshly, signaling that my release was upon me. I brought my hands down on her shoulders and tried to push her backwards, but she refused to budge an inch.

There was nothing I could do to stop her from continuing her ministrations.

My whole body stiffened and hot spurts of my seed exploded from my body and went right into her mouth. I watched in amazement as she swallowed all that I gave her. She gave me a few extra licks before pulling back and resting on her haunches looked quite pleased with herself. I took gasping breaths into my lungs as she stood up and bit her lip.

"So was that better than last time?" she asked curiously and I managed to squeak out.

"Huhhmm," she grinned at me before grimacing. I suddenly remembered the fact that had just swallowed my seed and that it probably did not taste that nice.

"Are you okay? I did try and move you," I said weakly.

She blushed, "It's not the taste, it's...my jaw is tired. You're quite big so I had to open my mouth pretty wide to fit you in."

I stared at her for a second, "Oh."

I looked down at myself. I had always known I was pretty big, but I could honestly say that this was the first time it had been an inconvenience.

"I can't believe I did that," she mumbled and I looked up at her startled. Her blush had deepened considerably and she seemed to be more talking to herself than towards me.

She met my eyes embarrassed, "I just saw what you were doing and it was like something inside me snapped." Her eyes were big and I did not understand why she felt like she had to explain her actions to me.

"I just had to take you in my mouth. It wasn't a want, it was a necessity…," her voice trailed off as she looked over my shoulder and out of the window. She frowned and I turned to see what had taken her attention.

There was a woman walking up lawn towards the house. She was tugging a small boy along behind her and though I was used to people coming round to beg, usually their stance was humbled. This woman looked like she on a mission.

I shared a perplexed look with Bella before pulling up my trousers and doing them up. There was only one way to find out.

Once we were certain that we looked presentable, we exited our room and hurried down the stairs as loud chatter reached our ears. Alistair was arguing with the woman and I cleared my throat to get their attention.

"Is there a problem here?" I asked sternly.

Alistair coughed and looked embarrassed, "No sir. This woman refuses to leave without an audience with you." I nodded and looked at the woman again. Though she was dirty, she had her head held up high with pride and her eyes were fiery.

Her brown hair was pulled into a bun and her skirts were colorful. "Would you like to come in?" I asked.

She seemed pleased with my answer, "That would be nice." She shot Alistair and satisfied look and stomped past him and I led her into the drawing room. I didn't know where Bella had disappeared to, but there was something about this woman that brought around some anxiety.

She sat primly at the edge of her seat and the boy stood next to her with his head down. He could not have been any older than four and wondered what she wanted to discuss.

"They said you was a gentleman," she said looking around in awe. After a second, she snapped out of her trance, dug beneath her shawl, pulled out a worn, yellowed piece of paper, and handed it to me.

"This is what I is here for. She told me to give this to ya. Took me a long time to find you, ya know. If it weren't for that big crowd outside your house in London then I doubt that we would have found ya," I frowned and unfolded the paper carefully. My eyes skimmed over the words quickly and with each word, my skin turned to ice and the color in my face drained. It was not possible.

My eyes darted to hers and she looked at me sympathetically. "I should go now." she said and stood up. I opened my mouth to protest, but no words came out. The shock that emanated through me shook me to the core. She disappeared and I sat there re-reading the words over and over again, not understanding just what had happened to me.

How was it that my life had been totally thrown upside down for the second in the last few months? My mind ran in circles, re-living that fateful night. How could it possible? There was just no way. There had to be a logical explanation.

I heard footsteps coming towards, but I made no move to see who it was.

They stopped abruptly after a second. "Edward, what's going on?" My eyes tore themselves away from the letter to see Bella, Alice and my mother standing there. They were not staring at me though; they were staring at the little boy in the corner.

"Who is the boy Edward?" Alice demanded and I wiped my hand across my mouth and looked over at him. He stared back at me with eyes so blindingly similar to my own.

"He's my son," I whispered.

**AN: Dum dum duh! How the hell did that happen? Who saw that coming? When did this happen? Review and tell me how you think this happened.**


	22. Chapter 22

**AN: I am currently writing this from a secret location as some of you guys are pretty pissed off at that Edward has a son (sniggle). This chapter does...not... answer most of your questions because I'm cruel like that (And I'm sick, you should be glad I bothered to drag my ass out of bed to post this). For those who didn't bother reviewing (you know who you are) go back and read chapter 12 to see when Edward mentions the fact he did infact sleep with another woman. Also you will not read the note that was sent to Edward because that will come in later on in the story. My writer's block has kicked in so you will spend the chapter listening to Edward whine about how unfair his life is. Have fun!**

I lay on my back exhausted. I had decided to skip dinner and head straight to bed after Alice and my mother had whisked...my son, Peter, away to have a bath and to get him settled. Bella and I had hardly spoken a word to each other and the only contact we had was when I gave a her a kiss on the cheek goodnight.

My eyes stayed fixed on the ceiling refusing to move. I felt like the weight of the world was pushing down on my shoulders.

I had a son. The words still caused shock to go through me. One stupid mistake and my life was irrevocably changed. I still remember that night in the tavern that I had been staying at on a trip to Cambridge to visit some friends.

I had been lonely and drunk and young and just plain stupid. I had just wanted some company and the liquor had clouded my brain enough to think that when one of the wrenches flirted with me that it was all right to take her upstairs and have my way with her.

I still remember how hollow and cold I felt waking up in an empty bed. I had been repulsed at myself and though I never admitted it to anyone it was one of the reasons that fueled me to join the army.

I had mentioned once in passing to Bella that there had been one other girl that I had been with intimately and how unwise I thought that decision had been, but never in my wildest dreams had my brain gone to the fact that it was so easy for my seed to spread and create new life.

I huffed loudly and wallowed in self disdain. Why could my life not be as simple as the rest of my siblings? It seemed that my life was one of those romance novels that I know Bella secretly loves and that every time I had felt like things were going right something would pop up and disrupt it.

I distinctly heard the sound of the door that connected mine and Bella's room open and I glanced over to see Bella in her nightgown standing hesitantly in the doorway. I sighed and turned my gaze back to the ceiling not wanting to deal with what I knew was most likely not going to be a pleasant conversation. I wouldn't blame her if she hit me.

I heard the click of the door closing and I thought she had gone back to her room. Overwhelming sadness crept up on me and I fruitlessly tried to push it back down. I had no right to want her company after all that I had done.

"Edward..." The quiet voice near the bed jolted me out of my pitying thoughts and I turned my pained gaze over to where Bella was standing. Her lip was firmly embedded into her lip- a sure sign of nerves- and she looked uncertain.

"Can I stay here with you? I don't like sleeping alone." I frowned wondering why she was asking my permission. "You don't need to ask Bella. You are always welcome in my bed." I grimaced at how that sounded and decided talking was best not to be undertaken at a time like this.

"I know, but I thought you might need a bit of space after what happened today." I sighed.

"Trust me when I say this Bella, the last thing that I need is space." She seemed placated by my admission and she reached up behind her and slowly undid the buttons to her night gown before pushing it down over her shoulder, under her breast, and past her shapely thighs until it pooled onto the floor.

I quickly averted my gaze before the scene before my eyes caused an uncontrollable reaction to my body. She slipped in between the sheets beside me and pressed herself against me. She shivered slightly and I could feel her nipples harden against the side of my chest.

Bella snuggled closer into my side and I forcefully tore my eyes away from the ceiling to look at her.

I didn't understand how she could be so close to me without feeling repulsed.

"Why are you naked?" I asked in a strained voice trying with all my might to win an already losing battle with my body. She laid her head on my chest and answered, "I like feeling my skin pressed against yours. It comforts me."

I shifted uncomfortably under the sheets and wracked my brain to try and come up with something to respond to her answer.

"I'm sorry." She murmured and I looked at her shocked.

"What do you have to apologize for?" I asked incredulously. "You're not the one with an illegitimate child." She sighed and I felt and saw her face heat up in embarrassment. "I was apologizing for what happened earlier...you know when I put my mouth on you and let your seed erupt in my mouth."

I ran a hand through my hair and my mind flittered briefly to watching her swallow my seed, her lips still firmly wrapped around my aching manhood. I suppressed a groan as my erection that I had managed to keep at a half mast, flew up till it was saluting me and begging for something more.

"I assure you Bella." I said in the most calm, non strained voice I could muster. "I was not in the slightest bit offended by you swallowing my seed. I just thought that you rather not taste it. If you _want_ to swallow it then I have no objections."

My manhood, which sadly had a direct link to my brain, was telling me to stop being such a gentleman and to just tell her how much lust and want had flooded over me when I had seen her throat convulse as I sent hot spurts of my seed down her throat.

I huffed in annoyance as my erection strained against the sheets. You would have thought that finding out that I had an illegitimate because I inadvertently couldn't keep my manhood in my trousers would have been an equivalent of being dunking in a cold river, but it turned out that I was more sick that I had originally thought.

I draped one of my arms over my eyes willing myself to just shut down for at least tonight.

I felt Bella's warm hand wrap around my arm and tug at it. "Edward, look at me." I refused to budge even an inch and she huffed in annoyance.

"Would you please stop acting so childish." She hissed and I with that I threw my arm off my face. It was safe to say that I was not happy. My chest heaved and I gritted my teeth together.

"Excuse me?" I said incredulously trying unsuccessfully to reign in my anger. She narrowed her eyes at me.

"I think you heard me correctly the first time. I said stop acting so childish." I let out a humorless laugh. "Childish? You are accusing me of being childish?" I said incredulously. She nodded stiffly and we stared intently at each other for a long moment.

"Prey tell." I said letting my annoyance seep into my voice. "How exactly am I being childish?" She crossed her arms and shook her head.

"You act like the world has simply ended because you found out that you have a son. Worse things could have happened. You need to focus on the good not the bad and lying here feeling sorry for yourself will not help."

My lip curled up and I turned away from her and flung my legs out of bed. I stood up and strode purposefully towards the balcony. I needed to be away from so that I could calm my nerves.

"Where are you going?" She questioned and I answered as I kept on walking. "On the balcony." There was a rough quality to my voice that spoke of my suppressed anger.

"Why?" She aksed and I gritted my teeth. "To be alone." I said in the most calm voice I could muster, which wasn't very calm. I flung open the balcony doors and placed my hands on the balcony wall. I did not care that I was naked and that it would be possible for someone to see me in all my glory.

I simply needed the space to breath. I felt like I was suffocating. I wanted to throw back my head and scream out so that I could rid myself of this weight that rested on my stomach.

My breaths came out in rapid pants and I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose. A cool wind whipped to and fro and after a minute I sighed. I knew I should go back inside and apologize. I should not be taking out my mood on Bella simply because she pressed a few buttons.

My once simple life was no longer black and white. All these colors had joined into the mix and my brain whirled trying to catalogue every tiny detail of my life wondering where my pitfalls were and if there were any way that I could correct my mistakes.

I truly wanted to lock myself away somewhere and wallow in my own self pity. I rubbed my face tiredly. I didn't know just how much more drama I could take before my brain exploded.

I took three long pulls of air into my lungs before squaring my shoulders. I needed to act like a man, not some pansy. I turned abruptly and strode confidently back into my bedroom. Be lla was curled up on her side not facing me and my chest spasmed in guilt.

I climbed quietly into bed and hesitently placed my hand on her arm. She shivered from the cold of my hands and rolled over.

"I'm sorry." I murmured. Her eyes softened slightly as I continued. "You were right. I wasn't handling the situation like an adult."

She smiled softly and kissed my cheek.

"Thank you for admitting that you were wrong." She said quietly and I pulled her warm, soft body close to mine. I nuzzled my face in her neck and sighed.

"We should probably get some sleep." I said reluctantly as my erection that had diminished before had come back with a vengeance, "We have a big day tomorrow and I think we need all the strength we can get."

She hummed in response and snuggled further into my side. "Never have I heard a more true statement." I chuckled and kissed the arch of her neck. We could get through this. In fact, as long as Bella stayed by my side, we would.

**AN: Your questions will be answered next chapter...that is if I survive that long. Review and tell how annoying you find Edward right now...you know you want to...**

**I'm also looking for a new beta so if you are interested please PM me.**


	23. End of Part 1

**AN: I nearly didn't put this chapter in, but I figured you guys needed the closure that I didn't give in the last chapter. Thanks for the great reviews guys, they make my week!**

My eyes darted around the table taking in everyone's tense postures. Everyone's eyes were looking intently at their plates like they would find a painting hidden under all their food. I put down my fork with a clang and folded my arms over my chest.

This was completely ridiculous. It was obvious that they curious and yet they thought that by completely ignoring the elephant in the room that it would magically disappear.

"I know you all have things you would like to say so I think it's best if we just have it all out now." Everyone looked up at me startled.

"Edward..."My mother cautioned. I held up my hand to stop her, "No mother, it's best if we get it out now, instead of sitting stewing over it for who knows how long."

Silence emitted throughout the room and I leaned back in my chair waiting.

It was after a few minutes of quiet that Alice blurted out a question, "When? I mean, you were so depressed after Tanya's death that you just stayed at home all the time, when did you go out and manage to reproduce?" I raked a hand through my hair and looked down at the table.

"Do you remember when I went down to Cambridge to visit Randall and a few friends? Well it was a two-day journey and I stopped at a tavern for the night. That's where I met Charlotte." I still thought it was funny that I remembered her name. It seemed that a number had been planted on my head for years and I was taking a one-way ride to hell.

I never felt quite comfortable in my skin whenever I thought back to that night, but with three piercing eyes staring at me it made it ten times worse. It seemed that I was doomed to make mistakes.

"So..." My mother asked, "What do you plan to do with the boy?" I paused. The boy- who from the letter I knew was called Peter- was sleeping upstairs in one of the rooms and was around the age of five.

"I plan to raise him." I said with a note of finality in my voice. Bella's mouth fell open and she looked aghast. Her mouth opened and closed in shock before she let a loud huff and started massaging her temples.

"Edward." She said in a calm voice, "I understand that you feel that it is your responsibility to look after the boy, which it is. I just do not feel like this is the greatest time to start raising a young child. If you have forgotten, I am pregnant and at your insistence I am trying not to get stressed over it, but I an inept to be able to look after a young boy and look after myself. Nevertheless, you know I am with you in whatever you decide to do. I will support whatever decision you make, I just need you to crawl out of that hole you seem to have fallen into because I cannot take your moods on top of this."

Silence descended in the room and Bella closed her eyes briefly and continued to massage her temples. I frowned worried; my moods generally didn't affect people. Her eyes popped back open and she smiled weakly, "I'm fine." She said unconvincingly and I was about to tell her that I didn't believe a word she was saying, but Alice chose that moment to speak up.

"Why don't I stay here with you two instead of going back up to London? Mother can have my clothes and clothes for the boy sent down here- discreetly of course- and I will look after Peter and make sure that Bella doesn't go crazy."

I felt part of the crushing weight loosen and I sighed in relief, "Thank you Alice, you don't know how much that means to me." She smiled and shrugged unfazed, "It really is no bother. I've always loved children and Rose always watches her kids like a hawk. It should be fun." She smiled over at Bella who seemed relieved by the turn of events.

"There is still another matter to discuss." My mother pointed out. "What are we meant to tell people? This will be an even bigger scandal than what you have already have and if you have any hope to get married this will be sure to ruin it."

I stayed silent for a minute going through all the options, "Nothing." I said finally, "We tell them nothing. The woman who brought him came by way of the road. She did not enter the town so as far as the rest of the world is concerned, Peter does not exist."

"Edward, you can't honestly hide him away until he is of age!" My mother said aghast and I shook my head. "No I do not intend to do that. All I am saying is that we let nature take its course naturally. We will not force its hand."

Bella looked over at Alice, "Do you understand a word he is saying?" She asked. Alice smiled softly, "Yes, he's mainly saying that he isn't going tell anyone, but he isn't going to hide him away. When a situation arises that makes it apparent for us to mingle with others, Peter will be there. Edward just refuses to force Peter to have to be around people so they can just talk about him behind his back and be cruel."

I nodded in agreement, "It was bad enough with what happened to you, I refuse to put someone so young through that kind of emotional abuse." After we had finished ironing out all the details, to which everyone agreed to, we returned to our breakfast.

It wasn't until half an hour later when i was in my office that I met Peter properly.

I had been staring out of the window, my mind far from where my body was standing, when I heard a small voice behind me.

"Excuse me, sir." I spun around to find a small boy standing in front of me. I cleared my throat. 'Hello Peter." I said quietly. He looked up at me a crease apparent on his forehead. I rubbed my hands nervously on my trousers not knowing exactly what to do. Nerves ran through me as his eyes scrutinized me.

"Are you my father?" He asked quietly. The pure innocence of the question put my fraying nerves at ease and a let a small smile grace my lips.

'Yes, I am." I responded easier than I thought possible. He nodded confirming that he had heard me.

"Mummy used to say that I couldn't see you because it wasn't fair on you to take the blame for something she blamed on herself." I shook my head and smiled wryly. "I went along with it so I am as much to blame as her. She never regretted having you though. She loved you more than anything."

He was quiet for a minute before speaking up again. "Am I going to live here?" He asked and I nodded, "Yes. You will live here with me and Bella and Alice- for the time being."

"Is miss Bella your wife?" He asked and I felt a twinge in my stomach. Whether it was guilt or longing I wasn't sure. I sighed, "No, mine and Bella's relationship is...complicated. It was the only word I could think of that suited our situation. He seemed confused by my vague explanation, but he let it drop easily.

There was a knock at the door and I turned to see Alice there.

"There you are." She said a hint of relief in her voice as she came over to Peter and took his hand. "You can't just go running off like that." She scolded gently. She shot me a smile, a small twinkle in her eyes. "Bella wants to see you." I nodded and waited until I knew they were gone before exiting the room. Whilst Alice hadn't told me where Bella was, I knew she would be in library. It was her sanctuary.

I walked swiftly to the library and paused at the door as I saw Bella sitting in the window seat one hand resting firmly on her stomach. Though I couldn't hear her I could see her mouth moving as she talked quietly to the baby. I swallowed heavily as I watched the display in front of me.

It was like in that moment my life ran across my mind showing everything. Every good, every bad, every sad, every happy moment was right in front of me and you know what? I felt ashamed. I was ashamed at my behaviour, my pure selfishness, my lack of thoughtfulness.

I had been putting my feelings before others, not bothering to see the effect that it had on others. I had been pushing my responsibilities on others when it should have been my job to protect and look after everyone. What kind of man was I? I swallowed the bile that threatened to rise in my throat and stood straight. I would have to rectify this situation immediately.

I strode purposefully across the room to Bella who looked up startled. "You scared me." She chided looking at me curiously. I could describe to you how my face must of look. Determination was there along with sadness. I sat next to her and took her hands in mine.

"I'm sorry." I murmured. "Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?" I asked pleadingly. Confusion marred her face.

"Whatever for?" She asked her eyebrows dipping into a frown. I took a deep breath. "I have been very thoughtless and inconsiderate. Where I should have been putting you before my own needs I didn't and I honestly don't know how you put up with my behaviour for so long because I have been nothing but disrespectful to you. You, Bella, are my life. You should be the one that dominates my every thought."

I placed our joined hands over my heart as I continued speaking, "I have been putting my own needs before yours and it simply is not acceptable, especially at a time like this. I was to wrapped up in my own problems to be there for you when you needed me."

I moved our joined hands to her stomach.

"You and this baby are more important to me than my own feelings and my own misgivings. I should have noticed it sooner and I am begging you to give me another chance to redeem myself."

She seemed momentarily shocked by my pleading words, but eventually a small smile graced her lips and a chuckle escaped her. She placed her free hand over her mouth to stop her amusement from exiting.

"Edward." She said a wry smile on her lips, "There is nothing to forgive. I know you better than you think and I knew that in time everything would smooth itself out. It's just the way things work. You just needed to get your priorities straightened out. You moods, while they tend to annoy me- and rightfully so- come and go rather quickly. You just have to realize that there is a life outside your own head."

She placed her free hand over mine where it sat on her stomach.

"We'll get through anything that gets thrown at us Edward. That's just the way we were made. If we can't get over the small things, how are we meant to get over the big things?" Once again I was astounded by her wisdom.

"Everything will work out. You'll see. I feel that this is meant to be, that we are meant to be. We merely have to work through what life throws at us." I nodded and leaned forwards capturing her lips into a sweet kiss.

My hand cupped her cheek as I poured my love and adoration into it. "I love you Bella. So much that it physically hurts." I whispered and she hummed in response. "I feel the same. Whatever it is that we have is not something I wish to dismiss easily."

Our mouths continued to move against each other for a few more moments before we pulled back. Our breaths were laboured as we sat staring into each other's eyes as our feelings poured out through them.

"Thank you." I murmured and I squeezed our joined hand. I looked down at it and smiled slightly. It seemed to signify much more than just a simple handholding. It was like it showed that we were entwined. In our hearts, our souls, even our minds. This was it for me. This was what I had been waiting for.

**End of Part 1**

**AN: Don't worry about the whole 'end of part 1' thing. It merely means that there will be no chapter next week and that we are skipping over a month or so to get to the more important parts the week after. So what did you think? Good or bad? Review and tell me.**


	24. Part Two

**AN: This picks up a month or two later. I thought that after being away you guys deserved a bit of a present...so here it is. Thanks to CarlisleCullen1645 for beta'ing this chapter form me.**

**Part Two.**

"Edward." Her voice came out in a desperate whisper, it sent shocks of electricity through my body. I hummed in acknowledgement to her plea against the skin of her back; my lips dragging down as I did. She was positioned on her hands and knees with me behind her.

While I had at first been apprehensive to take her in this position, we had soon found that it was one of the best ways to do it, without putting pressure on the baby. We had been in the bed for the past hour, just exploring each other's bodies but without actually getting to the main event.

"Please." She whimpered helplessly as I flicked my tongue out into the dip at the base of her back. The saltiness of her sweat hit my tongue as well as her usual taste did and I sighed in contentment, knowing that if I had a choice, I would spend days - no, months - just memorizing every piece of her skin.

She buckled backwards and pushed into me, I hissed and gripped her hips tighter in my hands as she brushed against my swollen erection.

My hiss turned into a groan though, and I leaned forward and buried my head in her neck. My breaths came out in sharp, heavy pants. I cursed lowly under my breath as my body surged with such distinct and powerful emotions that I wasn't sure if I could control them.

I had so much to celebrate. My Bella and the baby's health. The fact that Peter had settled in nicely and had even started to refer to me as his father. The first time it had happened had been such a surreal experience.

I had been teaching him to play the piano while Bella took a walk with Alice- she had decided to stay to look after Peter- and he had just finished playing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star on the piano; quite a feat. for a boy at such a young age, and while it still needed some work, it had been the first time he had played it all the way through without stopping.

He had looked up at me with his green eyes and beamed. "I did it, father." I had been so shocked that I had sat still for a second before answering.

"I guess you did...son."

That day had been such a turning point, for everyone. It turned out that while on their walk Alice had asked Bella to breach the subject of taking Peter with her for a month in America. I had been so happy to see a light that hadn't bee

in there before in Alice's eyes, after I had given my consent. It was obvious that Peter was the child Alice had always dreamed of having and Peter thought the world of his aunt Alice.

They didn't leave for America until after Christmas, so I still had time to solidify our relationship.

It seemed that only time had been needed to smooth out the creases in my life. What with a consenting priest to host our wedding ceremony. We but had to wait for the reply from the king, which was known to take time.

My hands tightened further on Bella's hips - she tried again to move backwards - making it impossible for her to move. I smiled against her neck. "I love you." I murmured and she stopped wiggling momentarily and turned her head to the side, awkwardly pressing her lips against mine. I shifted forwards slightly making it easier for our mouths to move in synchronization with each other.

She pulled back after a minute, panting with her brown eyes half - lidded with lust. "Love you too." She murmured and my emotions surged through harder and faster than before.

Deciding that we had waited long enough, I slipped one of my hands down from her hip and paused briefly over the slight bump of her stomach before slipping in between her legs to see how wet she was.

I already knew from our earlier activities that she would be ready, but there was nothing like feeling the slippery wetness between a woman's legs and knowing that you were the one who had caused it to come to pass.

My fingers slipped easily between the lips of her womanhood and I caressed the knot at the top of it. Her hips buckled as a needy whine left her lips. "Edward...Please!" She begged. I pulled my fingers out, sucking her juices off of them.

My body was so wound up that I was having trouble taking it slow. The thin thread that held my control was at the point of snapping and I could feel something under simmering and just waiting to come out.

"Love, I don't think I can be gentle." I panted. She looked over her shoulder at me and gave me a perplexed look.

"Edward, I know that you have it somewhere in your mind that I am some delicate, fragile flower that can be easily crushed, but I assure that I can take whatever you give me."

I could feel myself wavering at her words, "But the baby..." I argued weakly. She huffed and turned to look in front of her again. "Edward, I doubt that you could hurt the baby, no matter how rough we have intercourse."

"What if I hurt you?" I asked. She sighed, "You couldn't hurt me if you wanted to Edward, but if it makes you feel better, I will tell you if I feel you are being too rough, okay?" I nodded - though she wasn't even looking at me - and widened my legs before positioning myself at her entrance. I took a deep breath before pushing inside her slowly. I paused when I was fully there, gritting my teeth together.

No matter what Bella had said, it went against my nature to be rough. I closed my eyes and repeated her words in my head, starting to say them in a mantra.

_She wasn't a delicate, fragile flower and she could take what I gave her._

"You know, if this is you being rough with me then I would like to know what you were being before." Bella commented and my eyes snapped open at her taunt to see her looking at me. She was obviously trying to hit a nerve and she was succeeding. I know felt like I had to prove to her that I could be rough. I narrowed my eyes at her and pulled back, thrusting back in harder than I usually let myself.

My hands pulled her hips back into me as I thrust forward, causing her to gasp as I filled her to the hilt. She arched her back so far forward that her stomach scraped along the rumpled sheets.

Gaining confidence I started a fast, measured pace and it wasn't long until she was pushing back into me with each thrust, forcing me further and more forcefully into her than before. I kept the pace as I pressed in and out, almost pulling out completely before filling her until our thighs touched.

"Does this feel good?" I asked increasing my pace.

"Yes," she said breathlessly and her head lulled back to the right. Her hair that had once been neatly brushed looked like she had fallen into a bush, after she'd pulled all the leaves out and made it stand every which way.

Our skin slapped together as we moved and I noticed that her arms were shaking as every thrust sent her body forward. In one swift movement I looped an arm around her hips and pulled our bodies backward so that I was resting back on me knees with Bella straddling my legs, her back was pressed flush against my chest.

Bella squeaked in surprise and I sat still, our bodies still connected.

"W-what are you doing?" Bella asked panting. I shifted slightly and frowned, completely ignoring her question. She would see in due time. "Put your arms around my neck." I ordered and she leaned her head against my right shoulder, wrapping her arms around my neck. Her hands weaved themselves into my hair and I placed my free hand on her breast.

I pulled her even closer, needing her body to be in contact with every inch of me, as close as was humanly possible. The only words I could think of to describe it would be a total act of selfless possession.

I buried my head in her hair and inhaled her scent. She was so intoxicating.

I pressed my hips forwards so that I went deep inside of her. She gasped and I traced the shell of her ear with my nose. It was harder to have intercourse in this position, but it wasn't long before we were both thrusting in time with each other.

"I love you so much." I whispered into her ear as small whimpers and breathy noises of pleasure left her lips. I brushed her hair out of the way slightly and carried on whispering in her ear. "I can't wait to make you wife. Then you'll be mine in every sense of the word."

"Hmm...Yes!" she moaned loudly, "I'm so close Edward." Her face scrunched up slightly and I angled my head so that I could capture her lips in a kiss. My hand embedded itself deep in her hair as our lips moved against each other hurriedly. She let out a low keening noise and I knew that she needed a little extra just to push her over the edge.

My hands were pretty pre-occupied and my mind quickly ran through its options. I tore my mouth away from Bella's. "Love, do you trust me?" I asked as I continued to thrust into her, enjoying the chorus of moans and whimpers still falling from her lips.

"Yes" she cried out still deeply immersed in waves of pleasure. I pressed my forehead against hers and looked deeply into her eyes. "I need you to touch yourself." I admitted and her eyes widened and her already flushed skin darkened.

I could see the conflict in her eyes as she bit down on her bottom lip. "I don't...I never...what do I need to do?" I was surprised that she was so willing to do this, and I quickly concentrated on the point at hand.

"I need you to reach down between the lips of your womanhood and at the top of it you'll find a small knot. I need you to rub it for me." I watched with bated breath as she slowly snaked a hand down her stomach and slowly parted her lower lips before hesitantly searching out the knot I had told her about. I hissed as her fingers brushed against me and a second later her hips buckled hard,

"Oh!" She gasped, surprise etched all over face.

"I found it." She said quietly, I looked down and swallowed heavily. She certainly had found it. Not only could I see her fingers rubbing over her knot softly, but I could also see myself entering and exiting her. I quickly averted my eyes to keep myself from releasing then and there.

"Come for me, Bella." I begged, wanting to feel the gloriousness of her squeezing and tightening around me knowing that it was me that brought her release.

Her hips continued to meet every thrust I provided with equal force as her hand worked over her flesh, soon I felt her walls began to milk me. Her muscles clamped down around me making it near impossible to move, she threw her head back laying it on my shoulder and screamed my name loudly.

Before I could react everything around me exploded into a million lights and I released heavily into her, long, hot spurts entering her more powerfully than ever before. I groaned out her name in ecstasy and the hand connected to the arm that was holding her steady in my lap, gripping her hip tightly and not caring that I could be bruising her skin.

Our bodies continued to move as we rode out our release, just before we collapsed forward.

We stayed that way for a few minutes; Bella on her hands and knees - her arms visibly shaking from holding herself steady - and me leaning over her with my hands gripping the sheets on either side of her, like she was my only lifeline.

My knuckles were white from holding on so tightly and the muscles in my arms bulged and trembled as I tensed. My head rested between her shoulder blades, feeling the heat radiate off of her.

After a few minutes we managed to pull ourselves together enough to fall onto to the bed side by side, flat on our backs. I rolled my shoulder and groaned. There was no words to describe what we had just done.

I glanced over at Bella to see her doing the same. "Wow." She murmured. "That was...different."

I chuckled and folded my arms behind my head, looking up at the ceiling in content, practically glowing with contentment. "Different good?" I asked. She leaned over so that she was looking down at me.

"I don't think good quite covers it." She said wryly. I chuckled again and moved one of my arms to trail up and down her side.

"Hmmm...how about mind blowing or earth shattering?" I asked with a serious expression barely holding back the smile threatening to burst through. She giggled at that.

"I think someone is trying to get an ego boost here." She teased, her eyes alight with mischief.

I smiled and cupped her cheek. "You know me too well." I teased back and leaned up to kiss her gently.  
"Now answer this honestly." I said seriously once I had pulled back. "Are you okay?"

She sighed in an exasperated manner. "Of course I am alright. I already told you that I'm not a..." I put my hand over her mouth to stop her talking.

"I know you aren't- as you so nicely put it- a delicate, fragile little flower, but it's in my nature to worry obsessively."

"Don't I know it." She muttered as I dropped my hand.

I shot her a reproachful look and she pecked me on the cheek, "It's one of the things I love about you." She amended and I snorted.

"Of course it is." I muttered.

She nodded. "Huhmm. I also love how you pinch the bridge of your nose when you get exasperated and the way you whine like a little child when you have to dress up."

I raised my eyebrows at her, "Those are not exactly welcoming traits."

She shrugged unfazed, "It's like what you said to me that time we were at your parents house. You're refreshing. I spent a lot of my life living with a man who showed me little next to no amount of affection. It's nice to be worried about you."

She looked away as she said that, looking slightly embarrassed. I stroked her hair and frowned, not quite understanding how someone could not love this girl. She was so full of life and love herself. She always wanted to try new things and even in sadness she was beautiful.

"I'll always worry about you." I whispered and she looked back at me with tears in her eyes.

"I'm going to hold you to that." She whispered in response before snuggling down into my arms. It was then that I promised myself that no matter what, no matter where we were, I would always try to be there for her. I knew that there was much of her past that she had not told. Things that ran deep inside and I waited patiently for the day that she might feel comfortable enough to talk about them.

**AN: Oh did you see their little moment after that monumental sex? Lol. I will warn you in advance that their will be some angst, like maybe even tissue needing angst. There are still things that need to be unveiled and pasts that still need delving into. I will promise you that there will still a lot of smut though and a HEA. Now review and don't be stingy with them, you know how much I love them!**


	25. Chapter 25

**AN: Writers block attacks again. Barely managed to get this chapter done. Sorry it is so short. Thanks for all the great reviews. Thanks to Green Eyed Tabby for beta'ing this for me.**

I awoke feeling calm and refreshed. I was lying on my side, one arm draped over Bella's cocooned body, the other resting under my head. I buried my head in her neck and placed a kiss on her pulse.

She stirred and groaned trying to burrow further into the sheets. I chuckled, "Morning love," I murmured. She grunted in answer, making a grin spread across my face. She simply detested being woken up, especially after getting pregnant.

I decided to leave her be seeing as I _had_ kept her up pretty late last light with my insatiable need to be touching and loving her at every possible moment. It seemed that pregnancy really agreed with Bella because it made it almost impossible for me to keep my hands to myself when I saw her stomach.

Even though you couldn't see very much difference in her shape apart from that her hips and breasts had grown- with no complaint from me- I still knew that it was in there. It was more proof that she was mine and carrying my child.

I sighed and stretched languidly before rolling out of bed knowing that Alice and Peter were probably already up. I grabbed my clothes and hastily put them on before placing one last kiss on Bella's cheek and heading downstairs.

Alistair greeted me once I reached the bottom of the stairs and handed me the post. My heart sped up and I flicked through the two letters quickly only to be disappointed. I shook my head, there was still plenty of time, but I really would have liked to be wed before the baby had its appearance.

I sighed and thanked Alistair before entering the drawing room. I was immediately attacked by Alice who flung her arms around me and hugged my waist tightly. I raised my eyebrows at Peter in question, but he merely shrugged and greeted me calmly.

"Morning father." He murmured before going back to playing with Liam who was lying on hs back, his four paws high in the air as he waited expectantly to be get his stomach rubbed. I chuckled and extracted myself from Alice's grip.

"Morning Peter, morning sister." She beamed up at me and planted a kiss on my shoulder. She was surely exuberent than usual. "Good morning brother. Isn't today such a beautiful day?" She question as she peered out of the window where the sun was shining down through the dark clouds and onto the lawn.

"Yes, I suppose it is." I siad lettig my lips turn up into a smile. She sighed in contentment and spun round. "I am going to pick some flowers so watch Peter for me." I resisted rolling my eyes. The boy could pretty much look after himself. He was not an invalid.

"He'll be fine." She looked at me sternly and I added that I would make sure he didn't try to do anything harmful. She seemed pleased with that responce and danced off out of the room a wide grin on her face. I shook my head at her and slipped into the chair in front of the desk to see what the two letters held.

The first was from my mother telling me about the general health of the family and how Jasper, along with Rosalie, was making plans to come down here. I was surprised that he hadn't already come, seeing as how inseparable they were. Rose had been too busy with the kids to come up earlier, but now had some free time and was making her way up with the two kids.

She asked about my well-being and the rest, making sure to add a whole section about the baby. My chest had clenched at that. Though I had come to terms with the pregnancy and was- if I allowed myself to admit- quite eager to have a child that I knew was coming, a little shadow still sat in the corner of my mind festering with the 'what ifs.'

As Bella had once told me, things would fall into place because they were meant to. So I would just have to suck it up and focus on the good, not the bad.

I read on, my eyes flickering over her request that we visit soon and just general mundane things that she liked to write to me about. I smiled fondly as I finished the letter and set it aside to answer later, before turning my attention to the other. My fingers hesitated slightly as I recognized the neat script on the front before opening it.

I read it through quickly skimming over the words, not sure whether I would like the contents of it. My eyebrows raised in shock as a few words jumped out at me. Laurent was dead. It seemed that after his trip to his villa in Burgundy, that he had strayed over to the local villages where he had been killed in a dual over a woman.

I had never thought that Laurent had been seeking pleasurable elsewhere even after he had voiced his discontentment over the lack of productivity in the bedroom. I felt slightly sorry for Irina having her husband die in such a circumstance.

I'm sure she would be milking the sympathy that being a widow was sure to bring. After her little stunt back at my parent's house, it was obvious that her and Laurent had not been exactly close, so the pain would be lessened at least in that respect.

A small giggle caught my attention and I peered over the letter to see Peter getting licked by the dog. Ah...Well this brought around a whole load of new problems. I had a son that only my family knew about and while I had promised not to hide him away, it seemed as though that bringing him along would start a whole new round of gossip, and I wasn't sure if anyone wanted that.

I rubbed my face trying to think clearly about the subject.

I had made a promise to myself that there would be no more hiding, no more secrecy. That only brought on more trouble than the original problem had. I had said that if the occasion should arise, that I would bring him with me, I just didn't think it would be so soon.

I was just thankful that it was hardly noticeable that Bella was pregnant. I doubted that I wanted to bring up that subject as well as the fact that I had an illegitimate son living with me.

I pinched the bridge of my nose and leaned back in my chair just as Alice skipped back into the room with freshly cut flowers, followed by a tired looking Bella. They both immediately caught onto my mood and asked what was wrong.

I sighed. "Laurent died in France and we are invited to the funeral." I felt kind of bad that my problems seemed to outshine the fact that Laurent was actually dead, but I couldn't help the fact that my life was slightly complicated at times.

After the initial looks of shock Bella snapped into action. "What shall we do?" Her gaze flickered to Peter obviously knowing that he was the source of my worried expression. I sighed and raked a hand through my hair.

"We go." I said decisively. I couldn't let the vindictive gossip of others rule my life. Someone we knew had died and we would go and pay our respects. Alice looked shocked. "You cannot mean that!" She exclaimed. "After the ways that the Denali's treated the both of you I am surprised that you opened the letter. No one would condemn you for not going in fact; I would find it completely understandable."

"Alice, it wasn't Laurent who was ill behaved." I said gently. "I will not let a bunch of jealous gossips rule the way I live my life and where I may or may not go. Most will be too polite to ask questions at the funeral and we will leave straight after. It is in two days so we will ride the carriage down to London tomorrow and stay with our parents and then we will attend the funeral and leave straight after."

I said this firmly with no space for argument. I mean we only had to suffer through one morning and hopefully everyone would be distracted and in mourning. Alice huffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Fine, if you are going to be like that then I am going to have to pack all our stuff. Come on Bella we need to sort out what to bring." She grabbed Bella's arm and started to drag her out of the room. Bella shot me a pleading look and I barely managed to hold back my grin.

"Alice, what about Peter?" I asked causing her to pause. Peter's head shot up with a look of horror clearly written on his face. He had already suffered through Alice's dressing up games. "Come Peter. We are going to find you the perfect little suit!" Alice gushed grabbing his other hand and dragging both of them out of the room and upstairs to her torture chamber. I shivered dreading the time when she would go through my things.

I immediately wrote to my mother knowing that she would most likely have gotten the same invitation and would most likely be expecting us back down in London. I sealed it quickly and gave it to Alistair telling him that it was rather urgent.

He nodded and left immediately. I was starting to think that stress followed me around and I shook my head deciding that I wasn't going to dwell on the negative right now. If I had learnt anything recently it was that worrying didn't help, it just made me more frustrated and moody.

Everything is going to be okay, I told myself firmly and turned and went into my study. Things had just got interesting...again.

**AN: Hmm...who expected Laurent to die? Lol, its all part of the story. They'll be off to London now. Review!**


	26. Chapter 26

**AN: thanks for all the great reviews! I want to personally thank Nissa-Cullen for what she wrote about me for the breath of Twilight's ****Countdown to Halloween II One Haunted Hallows Eve, it touched me deeply. So sorry that I disappeared on you guys, but with the holidays and writer's block I decided to put this on the back burner for a while. I'm back now and have already started on the next chapter. Sorry for keeping you guys waiting.**

I felt a certain sense of déjà vu as my feet landed on the cobbled streets of London. Had it just been four months since I had done the very same thing, with the very same feeling of wanting someone who was close to me to feel welcome?

I reached inside the carriage and offered my hand to Bella as she stepped out after me, a cloak wrapped tightly around her with the hood pulled up to hide her features.

Next came Alice holding firmly onto Peter's hand, protectiveness radiating from her as she looked around suspiciously.

The night air wrapped around us as we walked up the path to my parent's house. I knocked on the door and a minute later it was opened by Randall, my parent's butler.

"Master Edward." He greeted me and bowed slightly as he moved to the side to let us in. The house was quiet and I wondered where everyone was. Just then I heard the sound of shoes on the floor and Rosalie came round the corner. "Ah, you're here. I was beginning to think you had decided not to come." She seemed rather pleased that we were here.

"I only wish." Alice murmured only loud enough for me to hear. I ignored her easily. "Do you know where everyone is?" I asked.

She sighed, "There was some complications here and there with the funeral so you're parents left to go to the Denali's house and the boys are entertaining themselves in the drawing room with chess. I'm surprised they didn't hear you." Her eyes fell on Peter who was now standing behind me clutching on the fabric of my trousers tightly, obviously daunted by the unfamiliar place we were now residing in.

"Oh! Are you going to introduce me?" She said. If there was anything that Rose loved, it was children. I think they were the only things that softened her heart. "Rosalie, this is Peter...my son." I knew she was aware of our biological connection, but it gave this slight sense of pride calling him my son. She crouched on the floor to get better look at him.

"Hello." She said and Peter looked up at me with wondering eyes.

I nodded slightly telling him that he should greet her back and he looked back at Rose. "Hello miss Rose." He said quietly. Rose beamed and stood back up. "He is so well mannered. His mother did a good job of raising him. Should we go to the drawing room to greet the boys?" We all agreed to this idea and walked down the hall.

I wasn't sure for how long we stayed up chatting and catching up with the news that we had missed before we all decided to retire. Alice had already put Peter to bed in the room shared by Alec and Jane. I could tell that they hoped that they would make friends.

Since there were no strict rules without the parent's home I managed to get Bella to retire in my room.

I had noticed that she had been rather quiet and wondered if there was something wrong. I knee being here didn't exactly bring back good memories, but she had said she was fine and brushed me off.

But lying on bed with my arms wrapped tightly around her I could tell she was distracted. Just looking in her eyes you could see the sadness she was trying to hide. I sighed, "Are you going to tell me what is wrong." I asked as I nuzzled my nose into her hair. She let out a sough of her own and held me closer to her.

"I would ask you to leave it alone, but I am sure that won't happen." She was silent for a few minutes before she opened her mouth again.

"I was thinking about my father." She murmured quietly. I stroked her hair soothingly knowing her father was always a hard subject to talk about. The little she had told me about their relationship had filled me with such hate for a man I had only met once. His neglectful nature was almost impossible for me to just brush aside as easily as Bella did.

"What about him?" I asked.

She let out a sniff. "The last I saw him."

Her voice broke slightly as she spoke. "My father, he always had to have things his way. There was no other way. He wanted to control every aspect of his life and mine. When I found out that he had pawned me off to be some whore without even letting me marry the man first I was so hurt and angry. I always held this faint hope that somewhere deep inside he actual cared for me. I swore at him and told him I hated him. I felt so numb afterwards and I started to wonder if I was worth loving, if I was worth anything."

I could feel her tears hitting my chest and although I wanted to gather her up in my arms and promise her all that I had I knew she had not finished and so I stayed silent and simply carried on stroking her hair.

"I felt so hollow and empty and I nearly didn't go to you. I didn't think I _could_ go to you. I thought you would just be another man who wouldn't care about me. That like my father you would just see me as a means to an end. I was so frightened of you and of the future that awaited me.

But when I met you it was like even though I didn't know you or anything about you that I could trust you. I've never been able to trust people easily, but with you it was easy as breathing. You showed me that being myself was better than pretending to be like someone else. You held me when I cried; you always seem to know what to say to make me feel better and you loved me. No one had ever done that before and when I watch you with Peter I just wish that my father would have been like that with me."

Tears spilled freely down her cheeks as she let out all her emotions.

"My childhood was so lonely and even though you don't think I should say it, I can't help but feel so thankful and grateful to you." She grasped my free hand and placed it on my stomach. "I know that even if I don't make it, that you will love and cherish this baby with all of your heart."

My breaths ceased as searing pain stabbed at my heart. My body seemed frozen by her words and I closed my eyes trying to fight back the emotions that had crashed onto me like waves in a storm. How coulees she say that? How could she think that I would let her slip away from me easily?

"Don't say that." I choked out. I pulled away from her completely detaching our bodies from each other as I fought the overwhelming feeling that always overcame me when things hurt too bad for me to be able to cope with it.

The numbness would encase me and nothing and no one would be able to get through to me until I had successfully blocked whatever it was that had caused pain out of my mind.

"Never say that." I said anger boiling beneath the surface. Not at her, but at myself for the lack of strength I had for dealing with hard subjects.

I raked my hands through my hair and let out a sigh of frustration as I sat up. In the time that I had been trying to control myself she had turned away from me and was sniffling into a pillow. I cursed myself mentally knowing that even though I had tried to do the complete opposite I had still managed to push her away.

Could I do anything right?

"Love..." I murmured leaning over her. I pushed the hair out of her face so I could get a better look at her. "I'm sorry." I murmured. She turned to me and started sobbing in my chest. It was safe to say that I felt like the world's biggest bastard right now.

"Love, please stop crying." She shook her head. "I can't...st-stop." I pulled her away from my chest and looked down at her face. "I'm sorry." I said again and she shook her head. "Not your fault." She muttered. I barely restrained a snort. If I had the ability to overreact and to worry obsessively, then Bella had the ability to not see things clearly.

I was the one who had been insensitive to her and pushed her away causing her to now be sobbing into my chest and yet here she was saying 'it wasn't my fault.' Of course it was my fault.

I pulled her away from my chest again and looked her square in the eye for a second before crashing my lips down forcefully against hers. She squeaked in surprise, but easily relaxed into it. I knew it was a bit of a cheap shot, but it effectively stopped the tears. I pulled away before I got too carried away, "If it isn't my fault then whose fault is it?" I asked.

She shrugged and looked away, "No one's. I'm just emotional...because of the baby." I raised my eyebrows not believing that for one-second. "Uh huh and I'm thinking of growing a beard." I happened to hate beards with a fierce passion. She huffed, "What exactly do you want me to say?" She asked.

"I want you to admit that I hurt your feelings and that is the reason why you are upset." She looked at for a long moment. "I was already upset." I released a short breath through my nose. "Bella..." She was so stubborn sometimes.

She sighed, "Fine, yes it hurt when you pushed me away, but I understand why and even expected it. I was already crying before that happened, my hormones aren't controllable. My mind was conjuring up irrelevant reasons for why I was crying so hard and I just felt fat and insecure because you haven't made love to me since getting that letter and now I'm getting bloody hysterical."

By this point she was waving her arms around and acting crazy. She slumped back against the bed looking tired. "Are you happy now?" She snapped. I raised my eyebrows at her. I had momentarily forgotten how hysterical Bella could get when you pressed her to do things she didn't want to.

I brushed her hair out of her face, "Love, you know if you want something you can always ask. Your opinion matters to me." I said gently. She sniffed, "I know that. I just didn't want to be pushy. I mean it has only been two days and we were traveling all day so I'm not sure that even counts. I guess I just got used to you always wanting it."

"Bella, the reason we haven't had intercourse is because I didn't want you to be too tired when we travelled. I didn't want to wear you out or anything." She smiled softly. "I kind of guessed. I just thought that seeing as we were sharing a bed here and that you're parents weren't around that maybe you would want to..."

I raised my eyebrows at her. "Why Miss Swan, are you feeling frisky?" I asked in mock surprise.

Her eyes twinkled and a grin spread across her face. "I always feel frisky around you." She murmured huskily as she looped her arms around my neck and dragged my mouth to hers.

I groaned and shifted until I was above before detaching our mouths and leaning back on my haunches. I reached between my legs and stroked my hardening length hoping to get it to rise quicker. "Are you sure?" I asked her, not wanting her to exhausted tomorrow morning. We needed to have our guard up for the funeral and to have her in a constant state of sleepiness wouldn't help.

She spread her legs wider apart, her eyes firmly planted on my manhood.

"Uh huh." She murmured distractedly her eyes fixed on where my hand was moving. It seemed strange to me still that I felt comfortable enough around her to be able to do something so private and intimate to myself with her watching.

I was starting to think that most of my avoidance and hang-ups came from the fact that there was never anyone who really spoke and stood up to me. Tanya had just done what I told her and did what women were supposed to do. She wasn't really her own person. She was what was expected of her and I guess I never really got out of that routine.

Things had always played out in my life in a certain order and when Tanya died I just didn't bother any more. There had seemed no point to be invested in a life I no longer wanted. Bella had revitalized me and I guess it was only a matter of time before I properly flourished.

I was holding myself back by the invisible ties that wound themselves around me tightly and I knew that once we returned to my home I would have to be completely honest with her and show her just how much things in the past had effected, causing me to cut myself off from it almost completely.

I leaned over her body and kissed her slowly and gently just enjoying the feel of her warm mouth moving with mine. The only sounds that could heard emanating from our darkened room was the heavy panting and contented sighs that escaped our mouths in heated bliss.

I cupped one of her cheeks in my hand loving the feel of her smooth, silky skin beneath my hand. My other hand massaged her inner thigh before dipping between her legs. I did not feel like drawing this out with my usual exploration and if the buckling of her hips into my hand told me anything then she didn't either.

"I can't wait." I murmured against her lips and she responded by tugging on my hair with her little fists sending a shiver down my back. "Then don't."

I entered in one smooth, swift movement causing her to gasp in surprise. My head that had been bogged down by her heady scent and luscious body suddenly realized that our position was not ideal. We had not been in this position for a while and I didn't want my weight to crush the baby.

I let my head fall into the crease where her shoulder met her neck and let out a long breath. She wrapped her legs around my waist oblivious and moaned for me to continue. "Please Edward..."

I let out a grunt as my arms shook from holding my body back as it longed to thrust repeatedly into her wet heat and relieve the throbbing ache going through my body. "Love..."I murmured, "What about the baby?" I asked.

She let out an exasperated sigh. "Couldn't you have thought about that _before_ you decided to start?" That immediately put me on the defensive. I pulled my head back and looked down at her. "Hey, you were as eager as I was. I forgot, okay?" She huffed, "Roll over."

Realizing what she meant I took hold of her hips tightly as to not break our connection and rolled onto my back. Instead of just lying under her I pushed my body back against the headboard so that I was sitting up.

I leaned my forehead against hers and stared intently into her eyes as our hips started to move slowly against each other. The frenzy that had taken over us earlier was nowhere to be seen and we just enjoyed the feeling of being complete.

Her eyes fluttered closed and she slowly let her fingers trail up and down my chest before wrapping them around my neck along her legs pulling our bodies flush against each other.

It seemed obvious to me now that we both urgently needed this. With all the thoughts and fears running through our heads we needed the one thing that kept us grounded and reminded us that no matter what, we had each other and nothing and no one could tear us apart, not unless we let it.

**AN: There we have it. Drama, drama, drama. Still a lot more of it to come. Review!**


	27. Chapter 27

**AN: Sorry it took so long to get out, my beta accidentally forgot to send this back to me. Thanks Green Eyed Tabby anyway. Thanks for all the reviews and hoped finals weren't to bad. Merry Christmas! (it's not early to say that right?)**

The wind whipped furiously around my face, stinging it as we stood silently surveying the scene in front of us. My hand clasped Bella's tightly, unwilling to let it go for even a second. My other hand was holding onto Peter's hand as he stood partially behind my legs.

The funeral had been an interesting experience to say the least. How Irina managed to muster up real tears I'll never know, but she had always been a good actress. The wails she had emitted rivaled the screech of disturbed birds and it took all of me not to cringe in distaste and repulsion. I had briefly wondered if, had me and Bella taken him up on his offer, whether he would still be alive, but I chose not to dwell on it.

No one but he and I knew about the offer and I intended to keep it that way.

My family stood around us quietly as we talked amongst ourselves, my mother fruitlessly trying to convince us to stay longer in London, and Alice trying to get me to bring the carriage around so that we could leave immediately so she wouldn't have to see more of this 'disgusting display' as she so aptly put it.

I was so worn down enough from everything that I decided not to argue with Alice. While no one had actually come up to us, I could feel their eyes boring into me and it made me just itch to just ask them what exactly they were staring at me for.

I knew our good fortune wouldn't last long, so when I saw Carmen marching in our direction I turned to Alice.

"Take Peter and Bella with you and go call one of the servants to bring the carriage around," I said hurriedly. Alice opened her mouth to argue, but I simply shook my head and looked pointedly at Peter. If she wouldn't leave for my sake I knew she would leave for his. She nodded and sighed, but Bella merely tightened her grip on my arm.

"I am not letting that woman speak to you without me by your side. If she wants to be nasty about me, she can say it to my face." I could see the determined glint in her eyes and as weary as I was about what was to come, I would rather have her by my side.

I could literally feel everything quiet down around us as Carmen stood right in front of me, her face contorted with anger.

"I cannot believe you would dare show your face here, especially with that...that whore you insist on having," she hissed.

I kept my face cool and disinterested, not wanting her to see my own anger bubbling beneath the surface. Bella's nails dug into my sleeve as she also tried to control herself which made me wish that she had just simply listened to me and not had to put up with this grief.

"We received an invitation, Carmen, so why exactly wouldn't we be here; we simply want to pay our respects to Laurent and I highly doubt that now is the time or place to be having such a discussion." My eyes flickered to the many heads that where turned in our direction. While I really didn't want to hash out my less than amiable feeling out in such a public place- as if my life wasn't a big enough scandal already- I also knew that this wouldn't do well for her reputation either.

I was a gentleman and while I may not always act or talk like one I would never, no matter how much I would have loved to, put someone in such a position as to put their reputation on the line.

Her lip curled up into a sneer as she ignored my subtle warning.

"Do not tell me what I can and cannot do. None of this would have happened if you had just done you duty and married my daughter."

My hackles rose at the words she had spoken. She had to audacity to blame me for Laurent's death! His death was no one's fault but his own.

"If I must remind you, Carmen, I did marry your daughter for duty and she died. I simply do not know why you persist in throwing your_other_daughter- who before today was a married woman- at me in the hopes that I will take her as my own wife. I have no desire to marry your daughter now or ever, so I think it rather imprudent of you to bring it up at her husband's funeral of all places! Some things do not change Carmen and my lack of feelings for your daughter is one of them."

I let my breath leave me with a whoosh as I finished my declaration hoping that for once and for all that the message had succeeded in getting through to her.

I now saw that Irina had merely been a puppet under her mother's fingers, and for some absurd reason, was willing to do anything that would make her mother happy; including trying to seduce me. I wouldn't have been surprised if it hadn't been Carmen pushing her to do it in the first place.

Her obsession on joining our families together was beyond normal!

"Which one, because I'm certain that if you still loved Tanya, you wouldn't be with_her_." I was sure everyone sucked in a breath at the same time at her words. If Bella hadn't been running small circles in the palm of my hand I swear I wouldn't have able to keep my composure.

I should have known she would bring Tanya into this. It was like her secret weapon she would wield every time she wanted me to feel guilty...and it worked. Tanya had been close to her mother and had most likely told her of the awkwardness of our marriage. She knew the inside details of my marriage and used that information against me.

"I don't know what exactly you are insinuating, but I think we should end this conversation before we each say something we will deeply regret," I said in a strained calm voice.

I doubted anything I could say would make me feel regretful, but a crowd would not be welcome participants of our argument.

She opened her mouth to respond, but thankfully Eleazer had come back from wherever he had been, placed a hand on her arm, and whispered harshly into her ear. Her skin flushed before she turned and flounced of without another word. Eleazer shot me an apologetic look, "I cannot begin to tell you how sorry I am for my wife's behavior..." He began, but I held up a hand.

"There is no need for you to concern yourself with matters that are not within your control. I feel that Isabella and myself have overstayed our welcome and shall take our leave now. Thank you for the invitation to pay respects to Laurent, may he rest in peace." I gave a small bow and Bella curtsied beside me before we turned and made our way to the front where the carriage was waiting.

I helped Bella into it before getting in myself and it wasn't long before we were on our way out of London. I was slightly sad that I had not had time to say my goodbyes to my family, but I knew I couldn't have stayed in that place for a minute longer. I untied my cravat and pulled my hat off my head feeling the restricting bonds that always suffocated me when I was in town loosen as I ruffled my hair, ruining the slicked back locks. I let out a sigh and slumped back against my seat, closing my eyes as I let my thoughts stew.

I hated how much power Carmen had over me. With just a few words she could bring back the guilt, the nightmares, and the insecurities.

_Maybe if I loved her more..._

_I should have been there with her..._

_I never said goodbye..._

_My fault..._

I'm not sure for how long I sat there battling against myself. No matter how many times I told myself that it was in the past, that it could have happened to anyone, it still ate away at me, tearing me in different directions.

"Edward..."

My eyes snapped open and immediately feel on Bella's worried gaze.

"Are you okay?" She asked.

I nodded, "Yes, just thinking."

I glanced across the carriage to see Alice and Peter sleeping peacefully before looking at the slowly darkening sky as the green scenery of fields surrounded us. There is just something about the smell of dew and grass that relaxes me. It is where I belonged.

"About?"

I sighed, "Everything."

As much as I wanted to talk to her about Tanya, I didn't want her to feel that my feelings for Tanya ever came close to what I felt for her. It would just be another thing to be added to the pile of guilt. I knew that I should talk to her about it, but right now I was just too exhausted.

"You know you can tell me anything?" I looked into her brown, imploring eyes and was tempted to just tell her everything that was bugging me, but I knew this was neither the time nor place for such a discussion. I gave her a small smile, "I know. Thank you." I placed a kiss on her forehead and buried my head in her hair, inhaling her soothing scent.

"Soon," I whispered. I knew keeping everything trapped inside was the exact opposite of healthy, but it was a habit I had developed; one which was not easy to break. I wrapped my arms around her and closed my eyes.

"You should sleep," I murmured knowing that all the traveling wasn't good for the baby. She hummed in agreement and snuggled deeper into my arms.

It seemed that with every obstacle that came, we grew closer. And it was with those thoughts dominating my mind that I decided it was time that I was completely honest with Bella. It was time to show her every single part ofme. The parts I hid from everyone, but my pen and paper. It was time to show her the journals.

**AN: Ohhhh! What are the journals you may ask? You'll have to wait till next chapter to see. So what did ya think? Review!**


	28. Chapter 28

**AN: I cannot begin to tell you how sorry I am for the delay in this chapter. Everything has been a bit up in the air recently and my memory is like a freaking strainer and then there was complications with my beta so yeah...sorry.**

I sighed and closed my eyes as the sun shine down on the bench I was sitting on. It was too early for anyone else in the house to be up and I had decided to take my dogs for a walk to clear the mess that was my head. The dew shone and glinted on the grass and I thought about the last week. I had been meaning to show Bella the journals I kept, but the day after we came back we had been too busy putting away bags and getting back into the flow of things.

I told Alice about my desire to show Bella them and she had told me to wait until the opportune moment. A time for which I was dubious enough to think that it most likely didn't exist. When exactly is the time to tell your loved one, or show as the case may be, the very depths of your soul written down on paper? My every thought, my every sin and confession, splayed along the pages in black ink.

After Tanya had died I had devoted hours to writing down every feeling and thought that entered me. Nothing was hidden in the words I wrote, it was me laid bare.

The subsequent arrival of Jasper and Rosalie had pushed any and all thoughts of my journals to the back of my mind. I would need a separate time, a time when it was just me and her, to show her it. I wasn't sure what her reaction to the journals would be, let alone the room that they had been stored, hidden away, in.

I opened my eyes and stared out around me to see that the world was coming alive. The sun had lit up the once darkened sky and the birds chirped in greeting of the new day.

"Edward?"

My head whipped to the left to see Bella walking towards me. My heart constricted and left in my chest, nerves mixed with happiness dominating my emotions. She was already dressed for the day, even though it couldn't have been more than six in the morning. She clutched her shawl closely around herself as the wind brushed to and fro through the trees. Even though the sun was out, it did little to stop the sting of the autumn wind.

"Bella, what are you doing out here? You should be resting inside." I admonished. She simply shook her head and took a seat beside me.

"I woke up and you were gone. It worried me. You've been acting distant and I wanted to make sure you were all right." She always saw through me, no matter how hard I tried to conceal things. I sighed again and looked over at her, "I've just been doing a lot of thinking." I said vaguely. She frowned, "About what?"

I paused for a second before tilting my head at her. I think this was the time that Alice had been talking about. I doubted anyone would be up this early and the likeliness that they would disturb us was slim.

I took a deep breath and stood up, offering Bella my hand, "I want to show you something." I could sense her confusion, but thankfully she didn't question me, she just put her hand in mine and stood up. I whistled to the dogs and they came bounding over as we made our way back to the house.

I could feel the trepidation pushing at my chest, the niggling doubt pressing me to not do this, but I ignored it. I had to do this, not just for Bella, but for me also.

When we entered the house I didn't waste time in climbing up the stairs and walked down the long corridor until we came to the door near the end. I felt up on the top of the door ram until my fingers brushed against the metal of the key. I took it down and unlocked the door before replacing it.

The door creaked from disuse as I turned the doorknob and opened it to reveal a staircase. I took hold of Bella's hand again and pulled her up the staircase behind me.

"Where are we going Edward?" she asked, but I just shook my head.

"You'll see."

I opened the door at the top of the stairs and stepped into the dark, musky smelling room. I hadn't been up here in months, yet it still looked the same as I had left it. I let go of her hand walked across the room, navigating it easily despite the darkness of it, and went around flinging open the curtains so she could see the room in all its glory.

She gasped loudly and I didn't dare turn around to look at her. I wasn't sure I could take her reaction to it. I kept my back straight and stared blankly out of the window. This room was where I kept a part of me hidden. A part of me that I knew I would have to revisit. This room held the last piece of Tanya in it. This was the nursery we had set up for our child.

I could hear Bella's hesitant feet move across the floor as she moved the heavy sheets covering the furniture away.

"You've kept this locked away all this time," she whispered, "since..." She trailed off, knowing that we both knew the end of that sentence.

I nodded slightly and turned around steeling myself for the sight that greeted me. She had uncovered the crib and a rocking chair that had gifts from my parents. I let out a shaky breath, had it really been so long since it had happened?

"The last time I came up here was a few months before I left for the army. I kept a journal after her...their...death and when I left I stored them up here." I could still remember that day like it was yesterday.

It was just after the last of the things I needed had been packed up and I had placed the journals that I had been writing in since she died on the dusty, empty bookshelf. I had sworn to myself that I would leave this all behind when I left, that I would focus on my life now, not on my past.

My feet felt heavy as I moved towards the bookshelf and picked up the thick, bound journals. I walked back over to Bella and offered them to her.

"I brought you up here so you could see the side of me that I always hide. In these journals are every self-depricating, selfish, guilty thought that entered my mind between the time Tanya died and when I left for the army." She looked down at the journals that I was offering to her and then looked back uo at me with tears in her eyes.

"Oh Edward, you don't need to show me this," she murmured and I shook my head wanting desperately for her to understand.

"You don't understand Bella. I do need to show you this. I want to be completely honest with you. I hold so much of myself back because I'm afraid to get hurt again. What I felt for Tanya doesn't hold a candle to my feelings for you. If anything ever happened to you it would kill me, but not as much as the fact that you never got to know me properly. I want you to know me, every flaw, every shortcoming, everything. I need you to know me as I am and I can't do that if I hold so much of myself back from you. This is the only way I know how to show you the real me."

She nodded wordlessly and gently took them out of my hands. She brushed her hand of the first one's cover almost reverently.

"Are you sure?" she asked, searching my eyes for the sincerity that she needed to open it. I nodded and gave her a small smile. The weight that rested heavily on chest balanced precariously on the tip of a knife. It could wither crush me or be lifted off me and as she opened the journal to the first page I found I didn't want see her reaction. I couldn't bare it if she rejected me.

I turned away from her and walked back to the window, staring aimlessly at the scenery as the world woke up.

"_May 1st, I don't know what I'm meant to be feeling. Pain, anger, sadness, grief? It seems that right now all emotion escapes me. I feel paralyzed in my own skin. Merely drifting in a life that no longer seems my own..." _My fingers dug into the windowsill hard enough to draw blood and my jaw clenched tightly as she read it aloud.

Just hearing my written thoughts spoken from her mouth was enough to make me knees weaken.

_"Alice think that somehow writing down my feelings and thoughts will make me feel better, but how can I feel better when I don't feel at all. Maybe if I had someone other than myself to blame then I could face it. They keep telling me that it it wasn't my fault, that it happened to many girls because they were simply to young and small to bear children. If she was too young and small why did they make us marry so young, why did they let me put my seed in her if they knew she wasn't ready to carry it. I can't really blame them though, they didn't know she would die. They weren't the ones who put the wheels of her death in motion. The responsibility of that lies solely on me. I can see it every time I close my eyes. There was so much blood, it looked so red against her pale skin. I can feel the weight of her lifeless blue eyes searing into me, blaming me for her demise, accusing me of not giving her enough, not loving her enough..."_

Bella trailed off and I turned to see tears falling down her cheeks. Her fingers shook as she closed it and held it close to her chest almost reverently. "Edward..." Her eyes stared into mine imploringly and I couldn't take it any longer.

No matter what her decision was, whether she rejected me or not, I had to take her in my arms and just hold her. I strode across the room and took her in my arms gently as she sobbed against my shoulder. I rocked her gently and placed a kiss in her hair.

"Don't cry love," I whispered, closing my eyes from the onslaught of my own emotion. "Not for me, or for what I wrote. It isn't worth it, I'm not worth it." She recoiled away from me like I had slapped her and stared at me in disbelief.

"Do you actually believe that?" she asked tears still streaming down her face. I sighed and looked away. The rawness of the wound that had been re-opened weakening me. "Edward Anthony Cullen, you look at me right now and answer the question." I looked back at her to see anger flashing in her eyes.

"Bella..." I started, but she cut me off. "Don't 'Bella' me Edward. Answer the question. Do you believe you aren't worth my tears?" I clenched my jaw and raked a hand through my hair before slumping into the rocking chair and letting my head fall back.

"I don't know. I look at myself, my life and see every mistake that I ever made. Maybe I deserved every folly and pain that befell me. I don't know what I do and do not deserve..." I trailed off. I was too emotional exhausted to carry on this conversation. The thoughts in my head no longer made sense as they muddled together and tripped over themselves trying to gather in an orderly fashion.

I closed my eyes and let out a sigh as I felt Bella's hands cup my face.

"You do deserve my tears. Every one that falls. Whether they be angry, hurt or sad. Every one belongs to you and I wouldn't have it any other way. You showed me how beautiful the world can be if you look at it in the right way and no matter what, you will always be in my heart." I opened my eyes slowly and drew her into my lap. I placed a hand at the back of her neck and drew her head down so that I could mold my lips with hers. How did she always know what to say to me to make me feel better?

She let out a small moan as she fisted on her hands into in shirt, pulling me closer to her.

"You show me such passion Edward, such love," she murmured between heavy kisses as her hand pulled my shirt from my trousers and dipped under to touch the hard plains of my chest. "What are you doing to me woman?" I groaned into her mouth feeling the need in my trousers bulge as my desire grew.

Just then I heard the stairs creak and my head immediately shot up as my eyes widened. Bella looked at me with an equal amount of panic and tried to climb off my lap as I hurriedly pulled my shrt back into my trousers and straightened out my hair. I quickly yanked her back into my lap shaking my head and motioning to the erection protunding in my lap.

She blushed but stayed put as Alice and Jasper came up the stairs.

Alice smiled warmly as she looked around, "So you showed her the nursery...I think with a bit of redecorating that this place would be perfect for the little one on the way." Jasper eyed me cautiously, having been in the family long enough to know my reaction towards anything that had to do with Tanya was generally not positive.

Neither commented on the intimate position they had found us in.

I loosened my grip around her waist nodding slightly, telling her that it was safe to move now. Bella moved off my lap and brushed out any creases from her dress that had formed from our impromptu kissing. She moved effortlessly to where she left the journals and picked them up.

"I think anything you do will be lovely Alice," she commented causing Alice to beam. I leaned forwards in the chair placing my feet firmly on the ground so the chair wouldn't rock. I leant my head on my elbows and looked around at all the old memories in the room. Maybe it was time to start making new ones.

Jasper came over to me while Alice and Bella started talking about ways to make the room pretty without it being for a specific gender.

"She's really started to heal you, hasn't she?" he said quietly. I let a small smile tug at my lips,"Yes, she's turned my whole world upside down and I wouldn't have it any other way."

**AN: There we have it! Review!**


	29. Chapter 29

**AN: This chapter ended up being kind of pointless. I was bored and this is just smut... with a small (very small) bit of plot. Sorry about that, there will be plot next chapter. I promise!**

"Edward...Edward...Edward..." My eyes shot open as I felt Bella's hands clawing at my chest as she tried to get as close as possible to me. Her legs twisted between mine and her arms wrapped around my chest as she buried her head in my neck. The hold of sleep exaporated as I felt wetness hit my skin and panic took its place.

"Bella, what's going on?" I asked panicked as I pulled her away from me so that I could look at her. She resisted, clutching onto me, digging her nails into the skin of my back. "Don't let him take me, don't let him take me, don't leave me with him Edward."

She was making absolutely no sense at all and as my mind cleared I deduced that she had a bad dream and the after effects were crushing.

"Shh love...I got you. I'm not going to let anyone take you away from me." I sat up and pulled her into my lap before rocking her gently to and fro in my arms. I kept on whispering to her, telling her that I had her and that I wouldn't ever let her go.

She buried her head in my shoulder as she whispered, "It was so real. He was there and you let him take me away. You didn't want me anymore..." Her voice trailed off as I felt the tears multiply.

"Shh, my beautiful girl. How could I ever not want you? You mean everything to me." I consoled her.

She pulled back and looked at me with her big, brown, watery eyes filled with so much uncertainty and vulnerability that I was reminded of just how young she really was. "Really?" She asked, hope coloring her tone.

"Of course! I don't even want to think about a world without you in it." I put all the love and sincerity I had into my eyes trying to tell her just how much she meant to me. She must have believed me because her look of uncertainty transformed into one of determination.

Her small fists wound themselves deep into my hair and her lips smashed against mine with such ferocity that I fell back against the mattress in surprise. I pulled away from hers as she gripped my bottom lip between her teeth.

I hissed at the jolt of pain that shot through me, but felt wierdly aroused at the same time. I successfully managed to pull away from her after a minute and panted out, "What are you doing?" She looked down at me from her perch on my chest all traces of tears gone and whimpered.

"I need you Edward, so much. I need to feel you deep inside of me, consuming me, filling me." Her hands trailed up her stomach until they gripped her breasts. My eyes widened as she threw her head back and moaned. Never had I seen her as wanton as she was now.

She rubbed her womanhood against my stomach making the wet heat of her arousal seep onto me from between her swollen lips. It surprised me how she could go from heartbroken to wanton in less than a minute.

She looked down at me with such desire and lust that I didn't quite know what to do. She raised herself up onto her knees, placing them on either side of me as she slid a hand down to her womanhood. I swallowed heavily, was she about to do what I thought she was going to do?

Her fingers parted her swollen flesh giving me a clear look as she dipped them inside searching for the knot at the top of her womanhood that I had showed her. She pulled them back and placed her glistening fingers at my lips, "Taste me," she whispered and I wrapped my lips around her fingers, licking and suck her essence off them with a groan before I sat up and pushed her onto her back so that she was lying with her head at the end of the bed.

To see her laying spread out for me, her legs parted enough to see how wet and ready she was for me, was enough to make any reservations about her emotional state vanish. My hands gripped her hips and pulled her towards me as I placed my head between her thighs and ravished her womanhood, not wanting to let one drop of her juices escape my hungry mouth.

The heat and taste wrapped around my head adding to lust haze my mind had fallen into.

To think that I had not tasted this sweet ambrosia since that day in my parent's house was enough to make me want to kick myself. How I had resisted this fine bouquet was beyond me. I was suddenly brought out of my thoughts by Bella's moans and mewls of pleasure as I lapped and sucked her swollen flesh.

"Yes! Oh my...Edward!"

I was aware that we were not alone in the house and we were not exactly being quiet, but once her hands embedded themselves into my hair and pulled and yanked it closer to her core, sending delicious shivers down my spine to my throbbing manhood, all thoughts of my siblings and their spouses flew out of mind.

I groaned into the heat of her flesh and her thighs clamped tightly around my head, trapping me. I could feel the tremors running through her body as she panted heavily, signaling that she was close.

I increased the vigor of my tongue against her knot before dipping it lower to where her entrance sat. The pressure of my tongue pushing against her tight entrance was all the encouragement that she needed to fall off the edge. Her hips rose off the bed, my head still placed firmly between her thighs as I licked the essence of her release. Her head was thrown back in rapture as she screamed out, rather loudly I might add.

When she had come down from her high, I pulled back, a satisfied smirk playing on my lips. I hoped that none had been disturbed by her screams of pleasure, but I couldn't quite bring myself to care if they had. To bring Bella pleasure, in whatever form that may come, was the highest joy I could ever hope to achieve.

I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand and crawled up her body.

The moon shone down on her pale body, highlighting the light sheen of sweat that covered her. Her eyes stayed closed as her chest heaved up and down with each breath, causing her breasts to move with the movement. Just thinking about how she had held them in her hands, barely able to contain them as they spilled between her fingers, was enough to bring my own painful need to the front of my mind.

I traced my tongue around her nipple hoping to revive her from her almost sleep like trance. She moaned quietly, arching her chest closer to my mouth as I took her pink, hardened nipple into it, licking, sucking, scraping my teeth gently over her sensitive skin.

She whimpered, her eyes still not opening as she rolled her head to the side, exposing the long column of her neck.

She looked so serene and calm lying there with her pale skin glowing almost white in contrast to her dark hair. Her fingers trailed down my chest, curling at the tips so her nails could scrape along my skin. Her eyes flickered open and she grasped my hair in her free hand and yanked my head down to mold my lips with hers.

I hesitated knowing just where my mouth had been not but minutes ago, but as her tongue thrust into my mouth I gave up caring.

I felt her hand brush against the hairs at the base of my manhood and I could barely suppress the moan that escaped me as she wrapped her hand around my thick shaft.

She pulled back breathing heavily and dragged her lips to my ear, "I need you inside of me," she whispered, her breath tickling my ear and causing me to shiver. I groaned as my hips jerked forwards, causing me to push myself further into her grip. Sparks flew behind my eyelids and I reared back, leaning on my haunches as I looked at her with a wild expression.

"On your hands and knees now!" I ordered with a growl. Her eyes shot wide open and she scrambled to turn over. Once she was situated properly in front of me I let my eyes wander over her body. I parted her thighs wider and kneaded the soft flesh of her pert buttocks greedily as she writhed and whimpered.

I leaned down so that my mouth was level with her ear, "This isn't going to be slow or gentle, its going to be hard and rough because I simply cannot control myself right now." Not waiting for her answer I jerked my hips forwards sheathing myself deep inside her, making a strangled gasp escape from her as she gripped the sheets tightly in her fists.

I let out a grunt at just how tight she was before rearing my hips back and thrusting forwards hard with no lenience or hesitancy. Her walls spasmed around me as she slammed back against me with equal vigor. I felt so raw and unhinged in that moment as I repeatedly drove myself deep inside her, our animalistic grunts and growls reverberating through the room.

I looked up to see the mirror on the vanity reflecting back at us exactly what we are doing. I had never known that it could reflect the bed, having always been facing in the opposite direction. It was oddly disturbing and arousing watching myself piston in and out of her, my hair falling in my lust-filled eyes as my muscles clenched with every thrust.

I wound my hand in her hair and tugged it making her lean her head back with a hiss. I leaned down and whispered breathlessly, "Look in the mirror."

She groaned and looked up into the mirror, our eyes connecting as we continued to move. Her lips parted and her eyes widened as she watched me enter and exit her body. The way her breasts swayed enticingly with each thrust was almost mesmerizing to watch, I felt hypnotized and couldn't look anywhere else if I had wanted to.

"More...please Edward, I need more," she rasped out desperately. I let out a strained chuckle, "Quite demanding aren't we?" I murmured huskily before pulling out of her and moving my hands, that had been lying on her hips to help her meet thrust with a powerful thrusts as my own, to her waist and twisted my body so that I threw her to lie at the top of the bed amongst the pillows.

She shrieked as she bounced on the bed, but it soon turned into a giggle as I moved to hover over her and claimed her lips in a heated, passionate kiss. I leaned back on my knees and motioned for her to turn around. "Put your hands on the headboard," I rasped. She obeyed willingly and I took a second to just drink her in.

The soft, round shape of her buttocks as she arched them towards me, the strong slope of her back partially hidden behind the long tresses of mahogany hair. I smoothed my hands down her back and rested my chin on her shoulder.

"Are you ready?" I whispered and she nodded vigorously, still panting in want. "Please Edward..." I cut her off easily as I entered her again, turning her plea into an appreciative moan. I focused my attention on every movement I made, slipping and sliding into her wet heat as she pushed back against me. I pumped my hips at a rate that would ultimately leave me sore in the morning.

Our skin was slick with sweat and my chest slid against her back. I pushed her hair to the side and attacked the skin of her neck, loving the slight salty, all Bella taste that hit my taste buds. I would never tire of having her, of feeling the tightness of her womanhood almost strangle me as it tried to keep me deep inside of her.

I moved the hand that lay flat against her stomach-an unconscious gesture I seemed to do more often than not-down to rub her knot. There was no way I could last longer than a few minutes.

A lone finger parted her lips and entered her slick heat and rubbed her engorged knot. The walls of her womanhood clung to me like the embrace of a lover-one that didn't want to be detatched willingly- as they collapsed and a cry of pleasure escaped her lips. Her hips buckled wildly forcing me in deeper as my hips thrust erratically, my own orgasm falling on me without thought.

I cannot aptly recall exactly what happened in those next few minutes, but I can say that by the time we collapsed, exhausted, side by side on the mattress, we were both completely sated and satisfied.

When my mind had finally caught up with the events that had just taken place and I turned to Bella, ready to ask her more about her dream. Who had been trying to take her away from me and what could possibly make me not want her anymore? But as my gaze fell on her peaceful face already taken over by sleep, I decided that it could wait.

As long as she knew that I was hers as much as she was mine then there was nothing more that I could do to eviate her fears. All I could give her was time and patience and one day she would know she was mine in every sense of the word.

**AN: So what did you think? Good? Bad? Review!**

_**http:/fandomagainstdomesticviolence(.)blogspot(.)com/**_**_ I will be contributing an outtake o_****r side-shot for Preconceived Notions** for this very, very important cause. The outtake will be in Edward POV and will have their wedding and other little snippets in it. **Please check out the site. The list of contributing authors is enormous! ****Donations will be accepted from Feb 1-28th. ****Minimum donation is $10.00 and will go directly to National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.**


	30. Chapter 30

**AN: I wasn't actually going to update today, but I had some extra time on my hands so here it is! This chapter is for all of you who don't have anyone on this day. Fuck men! All we need is sappy movies, chocolate, and Ben and Jerry.**

Bella snuggled deeper in my arms from where she sat between my legs, wearing only her shift and a blanket while I was topless and barefoot. We had decided to take a ride through the grounds before winter set in and it got too cold to go out without at least three layers on.

I was leaning back against a tree, reading, and while I knew that redressing would be a good idea, it had been decided that it would take too long to undress again.

"Edward."

I hummed in acknowledgment and flipped the page of the book I was currently reading, _Utopia_.

"Why is it that women don't enjoy sexual intercourse?" Seeing as I had not expected the conversation to head in that direction, it was safe to say I was a little shocked. I lowered the book and looked down at her as she twisted around to face me. I raised an eyebrow at her, but couldn't quite keep the amused smile from stretching across my lips.

"Do you not enjoy our private times together?" I asked and she gave me a look that told me that I already knew the answer to that particular question. "You know I do Edward. What I mean is that, before I met you I used to go to these ladies lunches and from there I gathered that martial relations was something only the husband enjoyed."

I couldn't but laugh at that, "Love, those lunches were held by women who's husbands were cads and didn't give two hoots about their wives. Those women are most likely unsatisfied harpies who spend their days sewing and forcing their children to eat boiled cabbage for dinner."

I looked down fondly at her, once again having forgotten just how young she was and how much more she had to learn of the darker parts of the world that were hidden.

"That's a little dramatic, don't you think?" she said, frowning.

I shrugged, "The world isn't all flowers and rainbows, there is a lot of things that are hidden away. No relationship is perfect, but some are worse than others. Some things that happen behind closed doors should not happen, marriage sometimes becomes a loose word, thrown around mainly for convenience. Without love or even the slightest bit of decency of taking another's feelings into account, the goings on of the bedroom become stale and dreaded."

She was silent for a moment before she spoke again, "What about with you and Tanya?" I grimaced and sighed, wondering why I always had to compare how drastically different my two relationships were.

"Bella, I am not going to tell you about the intimate goings on of my marriage. All I will say is that while I loved Tanya, I did not love her in the right way as to make any and all intimate and sexual encounters comfortable. I did not hold even an ounce of desire for her compared to what I have for you. We were both too young and inexperienced and altogether too naive to see what the real problems of our marriage were."

While I would never say it out loud, I hated to think what mine and Tanya's marriage would have become if she had lived. I could see now that we were not fit for each other and my mind conjured up scenes of frustration and unhappiness. If I thought long enough about it, I could see that neither of us would have been happy and as loath as I was to admit it, it was most likely fate that had took her away from me when it did.

It had been for the better and even though it had taken so long for me to let go of her and there would always be a corner of my heart reserved for her memory, I now had the means to fully embrace my life with Bella. No secrets or doubts niggling at me.

My eyes drifted up to the sky, where the clouds overhead were looking thick and hard, and sighed, "We should head back. It looks like the storm is coming in early and I don't want you to get sick."

She sighed, clearly unhappy about the fact that our alone time had been thrwarted by the weather. With the house as full as it was, it wasn't that easy to find time to spend together and as our nights were for more strenuos activities than talking, it seemed that we didn't spend nearly enough time together.

After redressing and making ourselves look presentable, I lifted Bella onto her horse before climbing onto my own. I was now exceedingly glad I had decided to head home because the clouds were moving much too fast for my liking and I could hear the quiet timber of thunder in the distance as I dug my feet into the horse's flanks and started to trot back home.

It was only when we were in sight of the stables that the heavens decided to open, spilling its contents down on us. We weren't as wet as we could have been, but after giving the horses to the stable hand I decided that a bath would be the best way to go. Thankfully the stables were near the back door of the kitchen and we raced for it and entered into it in a heap of wet limbs, laughing at the absurdity of the situation.

The kitchen staff were by no means unsurprised by our actions, having long ago gotten used our-I'm sure what they would call-childish behavior. After managing to straighten up, we made our way through the kitchen. After giving orders that a bath should be drawn, we made our way into the hall.

"Master Edward." I turned to see Alistair looking nervous by the door. I frowned, eager to get out of my wet clothes and not stand about chattering.

"Can it wait, Alistair?" I asked and his face turned pensive as he shook his head.

"You have visitors," he clarified and I sighed wondering what possibly worse timing could there be for visitors to be here. With the storm now raging as it was, there would be no chance of leaving until at least tomorrow.

"Could you possibly hold them off while I change. As you can see I am in no condition to entertain anyone." He nodded and disappeared down the hall as I pulled Bella along up the stairs to our room. There went any and all chances of having a bath, I thought sourly. We quickly stripped of our wet things, only pausing to kiss and run our hands over each other's nude bodies.

It was only when I pushed her against one of the bed posts and hitched her leg over my hip that she protested. She pulled her lips away from mine gasping, "What about the visitors?" I grunted and trailed my kisses along her jaw and now to her neck.

"I'm sure Alistair is finding a way to keep them busy," I responded, pushing my erection through her wet, swollen lips and inside her. I groaned at the feeling of her wrapped around me.

"God Bella, you make me so insatiable for you," I murmured into her ear as her head fell back and her nails dug into the skin of my shoulder, a moan fresh on her lips as I thrust into her.

I wasn't sure that the way I craved, the way I continuously wanted my body to be connected with hers, was natural. It was like I was obsessed, no addicted, to the feel of her under my fingertips, to the heat that squeezed and tightened around me, to the taste of her skin and juices on my tongue.

Everything about her drew me in, from the noises she made, to the way she responded. I could never get enough of her, get my fill of her.

I palmed her breast carefully, knowing that they were sore and captured her lips back into a deep kiss. Our tongues swirled and wrapped around each other as I let a hand drift between her legs and rub her swollen knot.

The amount of wetness that coated my hand was enough to send a strangled moan from my throat as her hips buckled forwards. I moved my other hand from her breast and collected both of her hands in it and held it above her head. She arched her chest out in front of her, her hardened pink nipples saluting the air. She squirmed and writhed against me, her body pleading and begging for more as my fingers circled her knot furiously.

"Come for me love, I want to feel you come for me." I whispered into her ear. She gasped out panting breaths as I felt her intimate walls collapse around my throbbing manhood. Curses spilled from my lips as my eyes shut tightly and I released heavily into her.

We came down from our high sweating and panting and it was only because my hands were holding onto her so tightly that she hadn't fallen down. I leaned my forehead against hers, keeping my eyes shut, and sighed, "I presume we should ready ourselves to meet our guests," I murmured reluctantly.

We dressed quickly and Bella went off to seek Rosalie. Ever since Rose had been here, she had been stuck to Bella's side as they swapped stoires about being pregnant and re-decorating the nursery. Hence the reason I had stolen her away to take a ride.

I straightened my cravat as I walked down the stairs and into the parlour where the quests were. My feet froze as my eyes met a pair of very familiar brown eyes.

"Charles Swan," I murmured, trying to keep as much of a civil tone as possible. He smirked, amused and took his hat.

"Ah, Edward Cullen. Just the man I was hoping to see."

**AN: Ohhhh, why do you think Charlie is there? Its sad to think that we are nearing the end of our story. Only about five chapters left, so sad...anywho, Happy Valentines Day and don't forget to review!**


	31. Chapter 31

**AN: I recommend that you read the first chapter of 'In The name of the King" if you want to know how Charlie is in this story.**

We stood, our eyes meeting in a calculating manner, as we regarded each other silently. I could feel my hackles raising at his mere presence in my house and the way he seemed smug made me cautious. I could feel myself strategizing why he was here and what he wanted. He obviously had the upper hand in this meeting as he had the element of surprise on his side and I didn't like being nervous or paranoid in my own home. I was only glad that Bella had made herself scarce.

"What can I do for you Charles?" I asked, making my face a smooth canvas, unwilling to let him see even a hint of weakness. He smirked at me before turning and walking at a leisurely pace towards the fire place.

"Well," he murmured, "I was sitting in my office, back up north-it's been so quiet without all the noise of the fighting-when I stumbled upon something." He paused and ran his hand over the marble of the fireplace. "You should get someone to clean this thing. Its filthy," he commented, completely getting off subject. Irritation flared up in me.

"Charles, will you please get to the point?" I asked with barely restrained annoyance. He turned and his smirk widened, "I'm sure you can a little bit of patience since I had to sit here and listen to you and my daughter do things a father never wants to hear their daughter doing." I could see that he had carefully planned this to try and put me in a corner. As if his hand wasn't higher than mine already.

I didn't let an ounce of emotion seep into my face as I leveled a firm glare at him, "I guess you should have thought of that before you gave her to me to produce an heir for you. Immaculate conception is something only heard of in the Bible. I am merely doing my duty." The words left a bitter taste in my mouth. I knew what me and Bella had surpassed all forms of duty, but to let me know that would only give him more leverage for whatever he wanted from me.

He nodded, conceding, "I'm sure you're right, but what you forget is that soon your 'duty' will be over." He leveled me with a glare of his own and let his mouth turn up into a sneer. "I know about her pregnancy and I know about the letter you sent to the king asking for her hand in marriage. I presume that she forgot to inform you that I told her before she left that a marriage between the two of you was forbidden. I will not hand my daughter over to a man such as yourself."

I tensed at his words and hardened my glare, "A man such as myself?" I asked and he gave me a look of disgust. "Do you think the fact that you have a child out of wedlock would escape my notice. I know everything that happens in this place. I know of your so called 'love' for my daughter. I know you want a willing wrench to spread her legs for you, but my daughter will not be that women."

I opened my mouth to let loose some of the anger building when I heard a crash behind me. I spun to see Bella standing there, a tray of tea smashed on the floor. Her complexion was pale as her eyes darted around the room.

"Father?" she questioned, confusion and timidity in her voice.

I hated how as soon as her eyes met his she seemed to fold in on herself, hiding the beautiful woman she was from him in fear.

"Isabella," he murmured his smile-if it were possible-widening even more, "would you care to explain to Mr. Cullen here why you did not tell him that I specifically told you that a marriage between was forbidden?"

Bella straightened up and I saw a flash of anger in them as she crossed her arms over her chest. "It was probably for the same exact reason that you didn't tell him that I told you that I hated you and never wanted to see you again." I raised my eyebrows in surprise at the coldness of her voice. While I knew the relationship between her and father was strained at best, I hadn't known that it had been so bad as for her to say such things, not that I didn't think he deserved every word of what she told him.

She made her way to my side, "So father, what exactly was the reason that you decided to bother coming down here because we both know it wasn't to see me." He scowled at her, his glare hard enough to smash through rock. She leveled him with a steady glare of her own, the only indication she was in the slightest bit intimidated was the way she stood a little bit behind me.

"Well, since you think so very little of me then I won't bother beating around the bush any longer. The king wrote to me to confirm that I was in agreement of this wedding you decided to have without my consent. Did you really think you could do it without me knowing? I know we never really got on Isabella, but really trying to worm your way into this man's fortune is really not the way to go. I have a perfectly suitable suitor for you. He is rich and will give you whatever your heart desires."

I placed a hand in the small of her back to comfort and encourage her. It seemed as though she had been wanting to do this for a very long time. Her back straightened at my silent encouragement, "My heart desires Edward, as does my soul and body. I do not need the weight of a ring on my finger to know that he feels the same. I will not be your pawn any longer. I dread to think what mother would have thought of you had she seen you in the state that you are now. Have you never known love or any sort of emotion that does not revolve sorely around you?"

Something passed through his eyes briefly before it contorted into a furious mask of anger. He strode towards us, his hand raised menacingly and I quickly pulled Bella behind me and gripped his wrist. "You will not lay a hand on her," I said in a low voice and tightened my grip to a painful degree. He winced and I dropped it. He cradled it towards himself and shot me a hateful look.

"I guess we should concentrate on the more important things," he muttered. "Jacob!" A movement in the corner of the caught my attention and I finally looked at the man that had accompanied him. Jacob was a tall man, at least a few inches taller than me with long, black hair that was pulled back into a greasy ponytail. His eyes were dark and beady and his teeth were a disgusting yellow color when he smiled.

Jacob walked gracefully towards us, his hands clasped behind his back, completely at ease. It was as if, to him, the tension that curled and coated us was nonexistent. He stopped a few feet away from us and looked us over an overly optimistic look on his face.

"Well," he said in a simpering tone. "Now that we have all the pleasantries out the way I would like to have a look at my bride to be."

I let my lip curl back from my teeth and let out a noise akin to a growl as he tried to peer around me. Over my dead body was he going to get anywhere near Bella. "If I were you," I snarled, "I would turn around and leave before I decide that your presence is very unwelcome. I can get Alistair to bury your remains." My eyes drifted to the rifle mounted on the mantle.

His face didn't change. It was almost like he didn't register my threat. He continued to try and peer behind me before giving me giving a pitying look.

"Look Mr. Cullen, you seem like a nice chap and I would hate for either of us to have to do anything we regret, so if you would move and stop this body guarding nonsense then I am sure we could all get along fine." I stared at the guy, was he being serious? Was he really that oblivious that was going on around here? Sure, he didn't know the full story, but he could have gotten the gist of the technicalities by the arguing that had been going on.

"Are you being serious?" I asked and he looked blankly at me like he had no idea what I was on about. "Deadly."

I raised my eyebrows at his choice of words and started to back away slowly. I did not like how this was going.

"Why don't we settle this in the morning? I think we can all benefit from a nice rest before any kind of showdown happens," I said calmly. Charles narrowed his eyes at me, most likely wondering what the hell I was doing. "With the storm the way it is, it's not like we can do anything right now anyway. So how about we have a spot of dinner and I'll have rooms set up for you?" I was not so subtly trying to buy myself time to figure out a way to get out of this situation, but thankfully it seemed to be working.

Jacob straightened the collar of his shirt and puffed his chest, "Why that sounds quite lovely, don't you think Charles?" Charles nodded slowly, almost grudgingly, and I continued backing out of the room, Isabella still behind me. "Excellent! I will go and talk to the staff immediately." I turned quickly, grabbed Bella's hand and walked swiftly down the hallway.

"What do you think going to happen?" Bella asked after I had pulled her into my office. I shook my head, having no idea how to proceed in such a circumstance. "There is no way of knowing for sure. But I doubt he will leave without you. He knows more than he should so I'm guessing he has someone on the inside giving him information. There is no way we can run without drawing attention to ourselves."

Ideas of heading for Gretna Green in Scotland passed through my mind briefly before being discarded. There was simply not enough time for such a rash move. I paced the length of the room, trying to find a quick and easy solution that didn't include bloodshed.

"Edward, please stop." Bella begged and I turned to her and pulled into my arms just wanting to feel her in my arms. "There is no easy solution," I murmured.

"Something bad is going to happen and there isn't a thing I can do, but prepare for it."

**AN: For those who don't know, Gretna Green was a small village famous for "runaway marriages" began in 1753 when _Lord Hardwicke's Marriage Act_ was passed in England; it stated that if both parties to a marriage were not at least 21 years old, then parents had to consent to the marriage. This Act did not apply in Scotland, where it was possible for boys to marry at 14 and girls at 12 years old with or without parental consent (see Marriage in Scotland). Many elopers fled England, and the first Scottish village they encountered was Gretna Green.**

**What do you guys think of Jacob? I made him rather oblivious and unassuming. He is merely a puppet in Charlie's game. Review!**


	32. Chapter 32

**AN: I apologize for leaving you guys hanging for so long. Especially since we are practically at the end. Writer's block was very inconvenient and I couldn't get a word out.**

_Dear Edward,_

_By the time that you read this letter I will be long gone. I don't expect you to forgive me or even like me once you read this. When I met you, you swept me off my feet and I fell in love with you easily. You gave me everything I could have wished for and treated me like a princess, but I realize now that while you'll always have my heart, that it just wasn't meant to be. We don't live in a fairytale where everything goes accordingly to plan and we live happily ever after. It was by fate that we met, but we cannot be and I cannot marry you. My place is by my father, the man who raised me from a baby, and I'll have your baby and raise him after Jacob and I marry like we were supposed to in the beginning. I should never have led you to believe that there could have been more to us than what the agreement stated, but I held on to the false hope that maybe if I ignored it then it wouldn't come to pass .I was wrong and I am deeply sorry for that. I know one day that you'll find someone worthy of your love and she will be the luckiest girl in the world and it is with that, that I beg you not to come after me._

_Yours No More,_

_Isabella._

My hands clenched the paper tightly, crumpling and ripping it. How had this happened? Was it not yesterday that she told him of her hate for him? I pushed back the pain and hurt threatening to break through. I refused to believe a word that she had spoken. It was not possible to change your mind that quickly unless it was somehow changed by someone else. In actuality, this letter was a load of...

"Shit," I muttered, not caring that my family was anxiously waiting around me. "This is a load of shit." I ripped the letter up into little pieces and threw it into the fire. She had not left willingly, of that I was sure. I gritted my teeth together and started strategizing. There was no way that they could be too far away and I was going after them.

"What are you planning on doing?" Alice finally spoke up. I looked up at the rifle hanging above the mantel piece and pulled it down.

"I'm going after them and I'm not going to stop until I get her back. Even if I have to kill them." I heard some gasps, but I ignored them because I knew the consequences of killing them. I found my bullets and filled the rifle up calmly.

"You can't be serious Edward." That was Rosalie. "If you kill them then you'll be arrested and hung." I scoffed at that, "You make it sound like I don't know that. Someone things are just worth it."

I made my way over to the door, but turned back to them when I reached them. "I'll miss you guys. If I don't make it back you're welcome to have everything I own." With that I exited the room and headed for the stables. I saddled up my horse and said one last goodbye to the house before riding hard in the direction of north.

The hours passed quickly as I rode through the well worn trails and I found that I was catching up easily. They were slowed down due to the fact that they only had two horses and three people, while there was nothing stopping my horse from galloping as fast as possible. It was just before nightfall that I came upon them. I ha slowed down, ready to head into the nearest town for lodging when hushed voices caught my attention.

I dismounted quickly, tying my horse to a tree before grabbing my rifle and heading towards the noise. My teeth ground together as I saw the scene in front of me. That dog Jacob sat by my Bella on a log, his hand stroking her cheek and murmuring to her as she tried to move away from him. It was then that I noticed her bound hands. Triumph flooded me as any doubt that she had left on her own accord vanished.

Jacob, clearly ignoring the signs that she clearly didn't want him anywhere her, continued talking and stroking her cheek until she turned and viciously spat at him. He seemed completely unfazed by her hostility and wiped his face with a handkerchief before patting her condescendingly on the head. He stood up and sauntered over to where Charles was building a fire.

They shared a few heated words, to which Jacob responded to by stomping off into the foliage. I drew back and followed him at a distance. I found him cursing and kicking a tree and I crouched behind a bush before drawing out the knife in my belt. I closed my eyes briefly to get myself in the place I knew I needed to be if I wanted to be able to do this.

I moved quietly and swiftly, internally shaking my head at how unaware he was. He didn't even realize I was there until I had an arm wrapped around his neck and a hand over his mouth. I placed the tip of the knife against his neck and hissed, "Fight me and it'll be the last thing you do." He relaxed in my grip and let out a small chuckle. I frowned and removed my hand from his mouth.

"Really, Edward Cullen? I should have known you would try so sort of hero act. We both know you can't kill me, you'll be hanged." I pressed the knife harder into his neck. "That is where you are wrong. Did you really think I would not be prepared for something like this to happen? My brother-in-law has a beautiful house in France which he gave to me after his death. I have a Captain waiting on demand for me to arrive at the docks. We both know that as soon as I leave the country, I'll be free. So running this knife through you is a very possible outcome.

He was quiet for a moment before he spoke, "What exactly do you want from me?"

"I want Bella,"

He sighed, "You know I can't give you her."

"So your life is less important than a girl?" I asked. He sighed again, "Fine, take her. I never wanted her in the first place. It was our father's that were so focused on getting us together. Do you realize how many willing girls are out there, begging for my attention? Take the wrench, just don't tell Charlie I was part of anything you plan on doing."

I took a step back, letting him go, an incredulous expression on my face. "You never wanted her?" He shrugged, "It was all duty." I smacked his head against the tree he was standing next to and he slumped to the ground, unconscious. I didn't even pause as I walked right out into the clearing where Bella and Charles were.

He didn't even look surprised while Bella's eyes bugged out of her head. "I wondered when you would turn up," he muttered dryly. I raised my rifle and pointed it right at him. "Let Bella go and I won't kill you," I said plainly. He raised an eyebrow and tapped his chin in contemplation. "Sorry...not going to happen. You see, even if you did kill Jacob-something that I seriously doubt-the baby that my daughter is carrying is too valuable to just give up. If I give her to you, then I'll never see the child again and you will turn him against me. I need that child to do gain control and so you might as well shoot me."

He seemed completely unfazed by the fact that there was a rifle pointed right at him and I pulled safety catch off.

"Don't Edward," Bella exclaimed and I weakened slightly. Charles mouth twitched up in a smile, "Yes Edward, listen to the girl. She doesn't want you, never did. How do you think I knew of her pregnancy? Or the fact that you claim to love her?" My hand shook as I tried to concentrate.

"Don't listen to him Edward, its all lies." My jaw clenched and I placed my finger on the trigger. The cool of the metal was familiar to me and I pressed down hard on it. My body jolted as the shot rang out, but I found myself lying on the ground, Bella lying on top of me, tears streaming down her face. "I can't let you do it. I can't let you kill him," she sobbed. "Do you know how dangerous that was?" I spat angrily. She recoiled slightly and I whipped my head as a maniacal laugh rang out.

Charles stood there, a handgun in his hand, pointing it right at me.

"Thanks Sweetpea," he said sweetly, "you're making my job so much easier." Bella scrambled up and faced him. 'Don't do this, father. It doesn't have to be like this. I'll go with, just don't hurt him." My eyes darted around for my rifle and cursed when I saw it nearly half way across the clearing. I stood up and pulled Bella away from him.

"You will do no such thing," I snarled, my gaze on Charlie. I started towards him, walking purposefully. "Don't come any closer," he warned, but I ignored him and lunged at him.

The next few moments were a blur as three shots rang out. Charles froze, his eyes widening and I took the moment to stab my knife into the side of his neck. Blood squirted everywhere as we both fell to the ground. "You will never touch her again," I hissed into his ear as he gurgled and choked on his own blood.

Jacob stood in the clearing my rifle in hand looking pale. He dropped the smoking gun and smoothed his hands down his trousers. "is he dead?" he asked quietly after a few tense minutes. I cast one last look at Charles, taking his paled skin and bloodied body, and nodded. It seemed that now that the drama of the day had ended, exhaustion had started creeping in. I lay next to him, trying to block the throbbing pain in my shoulder.

"Edward," I saw Bella's face hovering over me and a frown marred her face. Her hands felt incredibly warm as she cupped my face, worry now evident in it. "Edward?" she called more urgently as my eyelids fluttered. Her gaze lowered to my chest and a gasp left her lips as she pulled my jacket away to reveal the blood soaking through my shirt where my chest was.

"Edward, Edward, Edward. Stay with me. Don't you dare close those eyes." I smiled up at her weakly. "He'll never touch you again," I whispered, feeling even more tired. My eyes closed on their own accord as I sunk into the abyss of sleep. Everything seemed to fade away slowly until there was nothing left.

**AN: Don't hate me. I always planned for it to end like this. The Epilogue should hopefully come out sooner rather than later. Review!**


	33. Chapter 33

**AN:Hey Look! Gasp* It hasn't been two months, so no threats need to be followed through with. I just want to say that Jacob isn't the bad guy in this. He just trying to get people off his back by doing whatever they tell him to. Edward isn't dead guys, if you read the last chapter carefully, he said there was pain in his _shoulder._ Thanks for all the great reviews and I hope you enjoy the epilogue.**

The screams grew louder, clawing at my skin, as I paced back and forth in front of my desk. Sweat ran down my brow and the ache in my shoulder started to increase. It had been a bumpy six months to say the least. While my shoulder was well on its way to healing, I still wasn't able to move it properly and it would most likely never function right.

Me and all my family migrated to France, along with Jacob, to avoid the noose and had been living comfortably in the house Laurent had given me. It made me realize just why Carmen had been so unhappy to see me. The stress from her father's visit had caused Bella's pregnancy to hard, forcing her into bed rest for most of it.

Each day, fear hovered nearby, and I spent a lot of time praying that she would make it through this okay. Jacob had thrived in France, opting to live in Paris where the girls and drinks were never ending-his words not mine. Bella and I had gotten married as soon as it was prudent for me to be up and about. It had been a small affair, but knowing that she know had my ring on her finger made me rejoice internally.

Peter was doing well and was currently in America with Alice and Jasper and if the trip went well he may eventually become a permanent fixture with them.

I felt my father lay a hand on my shoulder, causing me to stop wearing a hole in the carpet. "Everything is going to be fine son," he soothed, but I ignored him. "Why is it taking so long? They've been in there for hours." My hands tugged furiously at my hair, the fear and panic threatening to drown my in its grip.

"The first child always takes the longest. It'll be quicker next time." My head whipped to stare at him in shock. I didn't think I could survive through more children. The panic must have shown in my eyes because my father was quick to remind me, "There is a chance that the child could be a girl you know?" I let out a breath that I didn't know I had been holding. You never realized just how dangerous pregnancy could be until you had to watch the woman you love go through it. I swallowed my feelings down only to be strung up tight again when screams started up again.

How could I just sit here while she was doing this? What if as I stood here panicking, she was dying a slow and horrible death.

"EDWARD! EDWARD." She had started screaming my name between sobs and I snapped.

"I can't take this anymore," I muttered, striding towards the door. I could hear my father calling after me as I nearly ran down the hall, all the while hearing her scream my name, begging me to come to her. I burst into the room where she lay panting and sweating, tears falling down her face. The midwife immediately started shouting at me and cursing me in French as my mother tried to diffuse the situation. Bella whimpered my name and I shot the midwife a look that shut her up quickly. I went to Bella's side and took her hand in mine before stroking a hand over her forehead.

"Shhh love, I'm right here," I soothed and she let out another whimper as her eyes darted to mine.

"If he's going to stay in the room then he needs to be out of the way. Either he sits behind or he stands in the corner," the midwife snapped. I huffed and rolled up my sleeves before climbing behind Bella, my legs on either side of hers as I held her. "You can do this love," I whispered as another contraction came.

The birth lasted well through the night and I did my best to make her as comfortable as possible by running a cool cloth over her forehead and telling her just how much I loved her. Dawn was just breaking when the midwife exclaimed, "I can see the head. Not much more now. I need you to do a few more big pushes and you'll be free."

Instead of being happy about the news, Bella started bawling her eyes out.

"I can't do this anymore," she sobbed. "Please don't make me do this. I'm so tired. I can't..." I could tell she was spiraling down into a panic attack and I turned her face to look at me. "Bella," I said firmly. "You can do this. You can do anything. It's nearly over and then you can sleep for as long as you want. I just need you to push for my love, okay?"

She nodded wearily and I kissed her tear streaked face. Her face scrunched up as another contraction hit and she yelled as she pushed, all the while gripping my hand tight enough to reduce my circulation. She relaxed her grip slightly as she panted, trying to gulp down huge mouthfuls of air before trying again.

It took another hour before the sound of a small, feeble cry reached our ears.

"Congratulations, you have a beautiful baby girl." I relieved laugh escaped me as Bella sunk against my chest, exhausted.

"You did it Mrs. Cullen," I whispered in her ear and she shook her head tiredly. "It was supposed to be a boy," she muttered. "I guess we'll have to try again them," I joked lightly, trying to hide just how happy I was that she had made it through this. "If you think I am going to let anywhere near me then you have another thing coming," she said weakly.

The midwife came back in the room, interrupting what I was going to say, with our baby wrapped in a blanket in her arms. She placed the child in Bella's arms and stepped back as she covered Bella to give her modesty.

My parents came in then and cooed over the baby who slept soundly.

"Have you thought of a name for her?" My mother asked. We nodded, "Renee Elizabeth Cullen."

It wasn't long after that, that we were forced out of the room so that the doctor could check over Bella and baby. "I'm proud of you son." My dad told me as we sat in the study having a well deserved glass of scotch. I nodded and looked out of the window that overlooked the vineyard. "I'm proud of myself," I admitted. "I never thought that any of this was possible. I can't even imagine what my life would be like without Bella in it. She brought me back to life and gave me more than I ever thought I could have."

There was no denying that I was finally completely happy and I knew somewhere up in heaven that Tanya and our baby would be happy for me to.

**THE END.**

**AN: I bet you didn't expect me to update so quickly, did you? In other news please check out my blog Welcome2MyWorldxoxo(dot)blogspot(dot)com to see what I writing and what is coming soon.**


	34. Outtake 1

**AN: It was requested that I write their wedding as an outtake. So here we have it.**

I felt an odd sense of calm as I slicked my hair back. Even dressed up in a fine suit, a silk waistcoat, and a restricting cravat, I was not my usual fidgeting self. Maybe it was the fact that in mere hours, the woman who I would give anything to was becoming my wife.

"Careful with your shoulder," A gentle voice chided and I turned to find Bella behind me. While it was considered bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding, we had decided that seeing as none of our relationship had been traditional, it would be a shame to start now.

I sighed, reluctantly giving my brush to her so that she could finish up my hair. Being incapacitated, no matter how blessed, as I was to keep the arm, was something that I did not like in the slightest.

Once she had straightened my cravat and brushed some invisible dust of my suit jacket she took a step back. "You look rather dashingly handsome," she murmured, a small smile playing on her lips. I wrapped my good arm around her, drawing her as close as her swollen stomach allowed before capturing her lips in a kiss. "And you, my dear, look utterly ravishing," I murmured once our lips had separated themselves from each other.

She did look ravishing, wearing only her undergarments covered by a flowing silk robe. Her skin seemed to glow as she beamed up at me. Her hair hung loosely around her shoulders and it was all I could do not to just bend her over the nearest surface and take her.

She must have seen the hungry glint in my eyes because she pulled away from me. "Now, now Mr. Cullen, we both know that an expression like that will only lead to trouble and with your mother and sister in the next room, I don't think you want to risk that."

The mention of my mother and sister caused my arousal so sink somewhat, but I merely sighed and placed a chaste kiss on her cheek. "You know me too well, love. I shall go check on the rest of them to make sure they are all well."

I walked through the halls of the villa; thankful for the medicine my father had given me for my shoulder. Without it, I found myself not venturing far from bed, knowing that the pain was neigh unbearable.

I was happy though, that it had not affected my performance in the act of being intimate. While I could not be on top, it did not diminish the times that I would indulge in her body. She simply controlled our coupling from above me.

I tried not to think of my shoulder as a weakness, but being mostly bed ridden would make any man's pride whittle away, especially when I hadn't even been allowed to relieve myself without help. The sponge baths that Bella gave were a rather nice highlight to the depressing situation and I wouldn't have taken back saving her for the world.

After we had fled the country, neither me nor Jacob wanting the investigations surrounding Charles death to get us hanged, Jacob had bid farewell and went to make his fortune in Paris. I still did not see how he would find it when he spent all his time in seedy bars and brothels, but it was his life to do with as he pleased.

I entered the study to find it full of friends and family, early awaiting the ceremony.

"Edward, it's good to see you boy," Eleazer clapped me round the back and I did my best to react as little as possible to the pain that shot through me with the action. Eleazer, along with Kate and Garret, had come along with Emmett and Rosalie from England to be here for the wedding.

It was their first public outing after the scandal of Irina running off with a stable boy and I was thankful that they seemed at ease. I was also thankful that Carmen had decided not to grace us with her presence. There was only so much we could put up with before things took a physical turn.

We talked for a while, sipping on fine brandy, before I excused myself to talk with other's who had come for the joyous occasion.

Surprisingly the time flew by quickly and Benjamin, my new butler, came to tell us that the carriages had arrived to take us to the church of St. Nicholas on the other side of Meursault. Meursault was a beautiful village, built in medieval times, and famous for its white wine.

Everyone took their seats and I stood up front with Emmett as my best man. I had been rather disappointed when Alice and Jasper had been unable to attend due to the distance, but wished them, along with Peter, well in their endeavours.

"Are you nervous?" My brother asked, fidgeting more than I was. I looked at him calmly, "I have no reason to be." He merely snorted in an ungentleman like fashion. "Welcome to hell my brother. Its a one way ticket with no refunds," he quipped.

"Its so nice to know you're relationship with Rosalie is going so great," I quipped back. He shook his head and kept quiet, most likely from the fact that the minister was giving us filthy looks. The fact that Bella was over six months pregnant probably didn't help with his attitude towards us.

It wasn't long before I heard the organ start and the chatter die down, signalling that it was time.

My heart beat abnormally fast in my chest from excitement and anticipation and I watched the procession start to make their way down the aisle. I inhaled a sharp breath as Bella came into view looking almost angelic in her white gown, her arm in my father's.

My father nodded at me as he handed Bella over to me and told me to look after her.

As we faced the Minster, our hands clasped gently between us, I felt any and all tension leave my body.

Our eyes never felt each other through the whole ceremony, even during the rings and the vows. The minister even had to tell me twice that we had been pronounced husband and wife and that I could kiss my bride. It was something earned a few snickers from the crowd, but I ignored them and cupped Bella's face in my hands and kissed her deeply.

I had only hoped for a chaste kiss, so when I tried to pull back only to find that Bella's hands in my hair didn't allow me to do so, resulting in a slightly inappropriate kiss. After some loud throat clearing, Bella let me go. I shot her a look, telling her silently that we would pick up where we left off later on.

She blushed and chewed self-consciously on her bottom lip before turning to face the aisle. "We did it, Mrs. Cullen," I murmured. "So we did, Mr. Cullen, so we did."

**AN: I know its short, but I had a bit free time to write so I got it down quickly. I'm thinking of maybe doing an sponge bath outtake as well *wiggles eyebrows*Review!**


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